100 Ways to Motivate Others, Third Edition: How Great Leaders Can Produce Insane Results Without Driving People Crazy
256
100 Ways to Motivate Others, Third Edition: How Great Leaders Can Produce Insane Results Without Driving People Crazy
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Overview
They have crafted a vital, user-friendly, inspirational guide for executives, managers, and professionals…and those aspiring to reach their level. 100 Ways to Motivate Others is based on years of successful live workshops, seminars, and personal coaching programs on communication and leadership.
This new edition includes fresh insights into communication and rapid decision-making, the importance of personal self-leadership and physical energy, and exciting new methods for enrolling clients and selling to customers in service-oriented ways that leave behind the old paradigm of manipulation and persuasion. The authors will help you learn:
Product Details
| ISBN-13: | 9781601632432 |
|---|---|
| Publisher: | Red Wheel/Weiser |
| Publication date: | 10/22/2012 |
| Series: | 100 Ways Series |
| Edition description: | Third Edition |
| Pages: | 256 |
| Sales rank: | 669,402 |
| Product dimensions: | 5.20(w) x 8.20(h) x 0.60(d) |
About the Author
Scott Richardson graduated from The College of Law at Arizona State University and has been practicing for more than 25 years and has been coaching executives for more than a decade.
Read an Excerpt
CHAPTER 1
Know Where Motivation Comes From
Leadership is the art of getting someone else to do something you want done because he wants to do it.
— Dwight D. Eisenhower
There was a manager named Tom who came early to a seminar we were presenting on leadership. He was attired in an olive green polo shirt and white pleated slacks, ready for a day of golf. Tom walked to the front of the room and said, "Look, your session is not mandatory, so I'm not planning on attending."
"That's fine, but I wonder why you came early to this session to tell us that. There must be something that you'd like to know."
"Well, yes, there is," the manager confessed. "All I want to know is how to get my sales team to improve. How do I manage them?"
"Is that all you want to know?"
"Yes, that's it," declared the manager.
"Well, we can save you a lot of time and make sure that you get to your golf game on time."
The manager Tom leaned forward, waiting for the words of wisdom that he could extract about how to manage his people.
We told him: "You can't."
"What?"
"You can't manage anyone. So there, you can go and have a great game."
"What are you saying?" asked the manager. "I thought you give whole seminars on motivating others. What do you mean, I can't?"
"We do give whole seminars on this topic. But one of the first things we teach managers is that they can't really directly control their people. Motivation always comes from within your employee, not from you."
"So what is it you do teach?"
"We teach you how to get people to motivate themselves. That is the key. And you do that by managing agreements, not people. And that is what we are going to discuss this morning."
The manager put his car keys in his pocket and sat down in the first seat closest to the front of the room for the rest of the seminar.
CHAPTER 2Teach Self-Discipline
Discipline is remembering what you want.
— David Campbell, founder, Saks Fifth Avenue
The myth, which almost everyone believes, is that we have self-discipline. It's something in us, like a genetic gift, that we either have or we don't.
The truth is that we don't have self-discipline; we use self-discipline.
Here's another way to put it: self-discipline is like a language. Any child can learn a language. (All children do learn a language, actually.) Any 90-year-old can also learn a language. If you are 9 or 90 and you're lost in the rain in Mexico City, it works when you use some Spanish to find your way to warmth and safety. It works.
In this case, Spanish is like self-discipline. You were not born with it. But you can use it. In fact, you can use as much or as little as you wish. And the more you use, the more you can make happen.
If you were an American transferred to Mexico City to live for a year and needed to make your living there, the more Spanish you used the better it would be for you. If you had never used Spanish before, you could still use it. You could open your little English/Spanish phrases dictionary and start using it. You could ask for directions or help right out of that little dictionary! You wouldn't need to be born with anything special.
The same goes for self-discipline. Yet, most people don't believe that. Most people think they either have it or they don't. Most people think it's a character trait or a permanent aspect of their personality. That's a profound mistake. That's a mistake that can ruin a life.
Listen to how people get this so wrong: "He would be my top salesperson if he had any self-discipline at all," a company leader recently said. "But he has none."
Not true. He has as much self-discipline as anyone else does; he just hasn't chosen to use it yet. If the person you lead truly understood that self-discipline is something one uses, not something one has, then that person could use it to accomplish virtually any goal he ever set. He could use it whenever he wanted, or leave it behind whenever he wanted.
Instead, he worries. He worries about whether he's got what it takes, whether it's in him, whether his parents and guardians put it there. (Some think it's put there experientially; some think it's put there genetically. It's neither. It's never "put there" at all. It's a tool that anyone can use. Like a hammer. Like a dictionary.)
The good news is that it is never too late to correct that mistake in yourself and your people. It's never too late to learn the real truth. Enlightened leaders get more out of their people because they know that each person already has everything it takes to be successful. They don't buy the excuses, the apologies, the sad fatalism that most non-performers skillfully sell to their managers. They just don't buy it.
CHAPTER 3Tune in Before You Turn on
Don't tell people how to do things, tell them what to do and let them surprise you with their results.
— George S. Patton
You can't motivate someone who can't hear you.
If what you're saying is bouncing off their psychological armor, it makes little difference how good you are at saying it. You are not being heard. Your people have to hear you to be moved by you.
In order for someone to hear you, she must first be heard. It doesn't work the other way around. It doesn't work when you always go first. Because your employee must first appreciate that you are on her wavelength and understand her thinking completely.
As leadership guru Warren Bennis has said:
The first rule in any kind of coaching is that the coach has to engage in deep listening. Which means that the coach must relate to the context in which the "other" is reasoning — they must "tune in" to where the other is coming from. In short, perhaps the basis of leadership is the capacity of the leader to change the mind-set, the framework of the other. That's not easy, as I needn't tell you for most of us, thinking that we have tuned into the other person, usually we are listening most intently to ourselves.
We were working with a financial services CEO named Lance who had difficulties with his four-woman major account team. They didn't care for him and didn't trust him and dreaded every meeting with him as he would go over their shortcomings.
Lance was at his wit's end and asked for coaching.
"Meet with each of them one at a time," we advised.
"What do I say?"
"Say nothing. Just listen."
"Listen to what?"
"The person across from you."
"What's my agenda?"
"No agenda."
"What do I ask them?"
"How is life? How is life for you in this company? What would you change?"
"Then what?"
"Then just listen."
"I don't know if I could do that."
The source of his major account team's low morale had just been identified. The rest was up to Lance.
CHAPTER 4Be the Cause, Not the Effect
Shallow people believe in luck. Wise and strong people believe in cause and effect.
— Ralph Waldo Emerson
A masterful motivator of others asks, "What do we want to cause to happen today? What do we want to produce?"
Those are the best management questions of all. People who have a hard time managing people simply have a hard time asking themselves those two questions, because they're always thinking about what's happening to them instead of what they're going to cause to happen.
When your people see you as a cause instead of an effect, it won't be hard to teach them to think the same way. Soon, you will be causing them to play far beyond their own self-concepts.
You can cause that to happen.
CHAPTER 5Stop Criticizing Upper Management
Two things are bad for the heart — running uphill and running down people.
— Bernard Gimbel
It is a huge temptation to distance yourself from your own superiors.
Maybe you do this to win favor and create bonding at the victim level with the team, but it won't work. In fact, what you have done will eventually damage the confidence of the team. It will send three messages that are very damaging to morale and motivation:
1. This organization can't be trusted.
2. Our own management is against us.
3. Yours truly, your own team leader, is weak and powerless in the organization.
This leads to a definite but unpleasant kind of bonding, and it leads to deep trust problems and further disrespect for the integrity of the organization. Running down upper management can be done covertly (a rolling of the eyes at the mention of the CFO's name) or overtly ("I don't know why we're doing this; no one ever consults with me on company policy, probably because they know I'd disagree"). This mistake is deepened by the repeated use of the word they. ("They want us to start. ..." "I don't know why they are having us do it this way. ..." "They don't understand what you guys are going through here. ..." "They, they, they ...!").
The word they used in excess soon becomes a near-obscenity and solidifies the impression that we are isolated, misunderstood victims.
A true leader has the courage to represent upper management, not run it down. A true leader says we.
CHAPTER 6Do the One Thing
Management is doing things right; leadership is doing the right things.
— Peter Drucker
I can't motivate others if I am not doing the right thing. And to keep myself in a relaxed and centered state, it's important for me to not be scattered, distracted, or spread thin. It's important that I don't race around thinking that I've got too much to do. I don't have too much to do. The truth is, there is only one thing to do, and that is the one thing I have chosen to do right now.
If I do that one thing as if it's all I have to think about, it will be extremely well done, and my relationship with any other person involved will be better and more relaxed and full of trust than before.
A careful study of my past week shows me that I did a lot of things, and they all got done one thing at a time. In fact, even in my busiest time ever, I was only able to do one thing at a time, even though I stressed myself and other people out by always thinking of seven things at once. When I talked to someone all I could think about was the seven other people I needed to talk to. Eventually, all seven people felt that stress and that lack of attentiveness, that absolute lack of warmth. Doing more than one thing at a time produces fear, adrenaline, and anxiety in the human system, and people pick up on that. People are not drawn to that. They keep away from that.
The mind entertains one thought at a time, and only one. The greatest cause of feeling "swamped" and "overwhelmed" in life is not knowing this.
The greatest source of stress in the workplace is the mind's attempt to carry many thoughts, many tasks, many future scenarios, many cares, many worries, many concerns at once. The mind can't do that. No mind can; not even Einstein's could.
I need to choose from the list of things that need to be done, and then do the one thing as if that were the only thing. If it's a phone call, then I need to slow down and relax and let myself be in a good mood so that the phone call will be a good experience, and the recipient and I can be complete afterward.
We talked to Jason, a national sales manager who had just finished a brutally long phone conference with his team. He spent the conference call nervously urging his team on to higher numbers and warning them that the team goals were not going to be met at the rate they were going. He had called the meeting because his own superiors had just called him to question him about his team's poor performance.
Although Jason had been working 12-hour days, he felt he was falling behind in everything. On top of that, his superiors' anxiety was then passed down to him. Because it was passed down into a hectic, disorganized mind, he freaked out and took it out on his team.
This is not motivation. Motivation requires a calm, centered leader who is focused on one thing, and only one thing.
CHAPTER 7Keep Giving Feedback
The failure to give appropriate and timely feedback is the most extreme cruelty that we can inflict on any human being.
— Charles Coonradt, management consultant
Human beings crave feedback. Try ignoring any 3-year-old. At first, he will ask for positive attention, but if he is continually ignored, soon you will hear a loud crash or cry, because any feedback, even negative feedback, is better than no feedback.
Some people think that principle only applies to children. But it applies even more to adults. The cruelest form of punishment in prison is solitary confinement. Most prisoners will do anything — even temporarily improve their behavior — to avoid being in a situation with little or no feedback.
You may have briefly experienced the relaxing effect of a sensory deprivation chamber. You are placed for a few minutes in a dark, cocoon-like chamber, floating in body-temperature saltwater, with all light and sound cut off. It's great for a few minutes. But not for long.
One day the sole worker at one of these sensory-deprivation tanks walked off the job in a huff over some injustice at work, leaving a customer trapped in the chamber. Several hours later, the customer was rescued, but still had to be hospitalized. Not from any physical abuse, but from the psychosis caused by deprivation of sensory feedback. What occurs when all outside feedback is cut off is that the mind manufactures its own sensory feedback in the form of hallucinations that often personify the person's worst fears. The resulting nightmares and terrors can drive even normal people to the point of insanity.
Your own people are no different. If you cut off the feedback, their minds will manufacture their own feedback, quite often based on their worst fears. It's no accident that trust and communication are the two organizational problems most often cited by employee surveys.
Human beings crave real feedback, not just some patronizing, pacifying words. The managers who have the biggest trouble motivating their people are the ones who give the least feedback. And when their people ask, "How are we doing?" they say, "Well I don't know, I haven't looked at the printout or anything, but I have a sense that we're doing pretty well this month."
(Continues…)
Excerpted from "100 Ways to Motivate Others, Third Edition"
by .
Copyright © 2012 Steve Chandler.
Excerpted by permission of Red Wheel/Weiser, LLC.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.
Table of Contents
Introduction to the Third Edition 13
100 Ways to Motivate Others
1 Know Where Motivation Comes From 15
2 Teach Self-Discipline 16
3 Tune in Before You Turn on 18
4 Be the Cause, Not the Effect 20
5 Stop Criticizing Upper Management 20
6 Do the One Thing 21
7 Keep Giving Feedback 23
8 Get Input From Your People 25
9 Accelerate Change 26
10 Know Your Owners and Victims 28
11 Lead From the Front 31
12 Preach the Role of Thought 32
13 Tell the Truth Quickly 34
14 Don't Confuse Stressing With Caring 37
15 Manage Your Own Superiors 38
16 Put Your Hose Away 39
17 Get the Picture 41
18 Manage Agreements, Not People 42
19 Focus on the Result, Not the Excuse 46
20 Coach the Outcome 50
21 Create a Game 54
22 Know Your Purpose 58
23 See What's Possible 59
24 Enjoy the A.R.T. of Confrontation 62
25 Feed Your Healthy Ego 63
26 Hire the Motivated 65
27 Stop Talking 67
28 Refuse to Buy Their Limitation 68
29 Play Both Good Cop and Bad Cop 69
30 Don't Go Crazy 71
31 Stop Cuddling Up 73
32 Do the Worst First 74
33 Learn to Experiment 79
34 Communicate Consciously 80
35 Score the Performance 81
36 Manage the Fundamentals First 84
37 Motivate by Doing 86
38 Know Your People's Strengths 88
39 Debate Yourself 94
40 Lead With Language 96
41 Use Positive Reinforcement 98
42 Teach Your People "No" Power 99
43 Think Friendly Customer Thoughts 101
44 Best Time? Biggest Challenge 104
45 Use 10 Minutes Well 105
46 Know What You Want to Grow 106
47 Soften Your Heart 108
48 Coach Your People to Complete 109
49 Do the Math on Your Approach 111
50 Count Yourself in 112
51 First, Just Relax 114
52 Don't Throw the Quit Switch 118
53 Lead With Enthusiasm 119
54 Encourage Concentration 122
55 Inspire Inner Stability 123
56 Give Up Being Right 125
57 Wake Yourself Up 126
58 Always Show Them 127
59 Focus Like a Camera 130
60 Think of Managing as Easy 133
61 Cultivate the Power of Reassurance 134
62 Phase Out Disagreement 135
63 Keep Learning 136
64 Learn What Leadership Is Not 137
65 Hear Your People Out 138
66 Play It Lightly 139
67 Keep All Your Smallest Promises 140
68 Give Power to the Other Person 141
69 Don't Forget to Breathe 144
70 Know You've Got the Time 145
71 Use the Power of Deadlines 146
72 Translate Worry Into Concern 147
73 Let Your Mind Rule Your Heart 148
74 Build a Culture of Acknowledgment 149
75 Seize Responsibility 150
76 Get Some Coaching Yourself 153
77 Make It Happen Today 154
78 Learn the Inner Thing 155
79 Forget About Failure 157
80 Follow Consulting With Action 158
81 Create a Vision 159
82 Stop Looking Over Your Shoulder 160
83 Lead by Selling 161
84 Hold on to Principle 164
85 Create Your Relationships 165
86 Don't Be Afraid to Make Requests 166
87 Don't Change Yourself 168
88 Pump Up Your E-mails 170
89 Stop Pushing 171
90 Become Conscious 173
91 Come From the Future 174
92 Teach Them to Teach Themselves 176
93 Stop Apologizing for Change 177
94 Let People Find It 178
95 Be a Ruthless Optimist 180
96 Pay Attention 182
97 Create a Routine 183
98 Deliver the Reward 186
99 Slow Down 187
100 Decide to Be Great 188
101 Show Your People the "Want to" 189
102 Learn to Encourage Testing 190
103 Teach the Love of Challenge 194
104 Learn How to Help a Pessimist 198
105 Switch to Enthusiasm 200
106 See Your People as Perfect 201
107 Learn to Master Problem-Solving 203
108 Welcome Every Circumstance 206
109 Do What's Required 209
110 Transformation, Not Information 210
Bibliography 213
Index 215
About the Authors 221
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