Zentivity: How to Eliminate Chaos, Stress, and Discontent in Your Workplace.

by Marianne Clyde

Overview

If you had heart disease, cancer, or another physical malady, would you let it run its course, or would you treat it? Physical illnesses can cause you to be less happy, less focused on the task at hand, and less productive. They can lead to increased absence from work or poor job performance. We seek treatment to feel better and to be happier and more productive so we can live our dreams. Why is it then that when illness is related to emotional, mental, or relationship factors that cause similar outcomes, we are more likely to hide and deny it, hoping it just goes away? This doesnt make sense. If we simply addressed the issues up front and learned techniques to help ourselves and our employees overcome them, we would see direct results in enhanced job performance, a more positive outlook, and focused productivity. Drawing from twenty-seven years of experience as a marriage and family therapist, Marianne Clyde uses stories and examples from the lives of clients that have experienced a happier and more passionate life by implementing the principles in this book. Zentivity offers clear strategies that are easy to understand and implement so that you can see immediate results in your workplace: better relationships and performance, as well as increased productivity.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781504383035
Publisher:	Balboa Press
Publication date:	07/07/2017
Sold by:	Barnes & Noble
Format:	eBook
Pages:	110
File size:	3 MB

About the Author

Marianne Clyde, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, has been helping people build strong, healthy relationships and live the abundant lives that they were created to live for more than a quarter-century. She is the founder of the Marianne Clyde Center for Holistic Psychotherapy, based in Warrenton, VA, as well as the founder of the Be the Change Foundation, which helps women build successful businesses to improve the quality of life for themselves, their families, and their communities. Her articles have appeared in numerous publications, and she has been featured worldwide on television and radio, commenting on relationship issues, emotional wellness, and empowerment. She lives in the foothills of the Blue Ridge Mountains with her husband and two Labradors.

Read an Excerpt

CHAPTER 1

Raising Awareness

Here are the facts:

Approximately one million U.S. employees miss work each day due to workplace stress. (Health Advocate, Inc. 2009)

Job stress carries a price tag for U.S. industry estimated at over $300 billion annually as a result of absenteeism, employee turnover, diminished productivity, and other workplace related expenses. (American Institute of Stress)

Unscheduled absenteeism costs roughly $3,600 per year for each hourly worker and $2,650 per year for salaried employees. (Forbes, July 10, 2013)

Eighty percent of workers feel stress on the job; nearly half say they need help in learning how to manage stress; and 42% say their coworkers need such help. (American Institute of Stress, August 2011)

With 65% of U.S. employees citing work as a significant source of stress and more than one-third reporting chronic work stress, workplace stress can affect both individual well-being and organizational performance. (American Psychological Association, 2016)

Fifty-one percent of workers say that they are less productive at work because of stress. (American Psychological Association, 2009)

A study by economists at the University of Warwick found that happiness led to a 12% spike in productivity, while unhappy workers proved 10% less productive. As the research team put it, "We find that human happiness has large and positive causal effects on productivity. Positive emotions appear to invigorate human beings." (Fastcompany.com, Jonha Revesencio 07/22/15)

Awareness is the first step to change. Most of us recognize when something is not working. The most common response to that, however, is that we keep our heads down and continue to put one foot in front of the other, just like we always have. We may complain that things aren't right; we may gossip about who we think is at fault and form cliques with others who agree with us because misery loves company. But this creates division, and division breaks apart families, communities, and countries, as well as businesses. Diversity and division are two entirely different things. Diversity adds variety, different perspectives, and the magnificence of learning to look at things in a new light. Division just creates walls that "need" to be protected, causing dissention, alienation, and dissolution.

It's not a bad thing to recognize that things aren't working. Again, awareness of the problem is important; but complaining and doing the same things over and over while expecting different results is a sign of insanity, according to Albert Einstein. Yet that's exactly what we do.

We believe that we can keep our home and work lives separate. Our employers actually expect us to do that, too. And when we get home, our spouses, partners, kids, and friends expect us to leave work at the office. It seems to me that it's easier said than done.

Because I think this is difficult to do, I asked the experts. I spoke to business people whom I admire and asked them to be honest and frank about their thoughts regarding what contributes to workplace stress and dissatisfaction. I asked if they thought personal problems contribute to problems in the workplace, and I heard a resounding "Yes!" When people are experiencing stressors in their personal lives, it's very difficult to stay focused on the task at hand. And when they aren't focused, things fall through the cracks, deadlines are missed, and sick leave gets out of hand.

One of the business owners that I spoke to acknowledges that "these issues are always at hand, and good management recognizes that." You can't pretend it doesn't exist and not do anything to resolve this problem, but still expect quality results.

If Zentivity is a peaceful, calm environment in which employees are actively engaged in the creative and productive process so that they can make more money and everyone can be happy and well- motivated, we need to take a look at what inhibits that.

What leads to less Zentivity? Feelings of captivity, negativity, projectivity and reactivity.

Captivity

Feeling trapped can make anyone unhappy or anxious, either in one's personal life or at work. Whether it is in a relationship or a dead-end job, this feeling of constriction and limited options can lead to frustration, anger, lashing out, or just escaping. The latter is often attempted in a variety of ways, such as self-medicating with alcohol, drugs, or food, or through extramarital affairs or disconnecting emotionally, which leads to all kinds of unhealthy communication patterns and behaviors. When people feel that they are in captivity, they can lose their motivation to be engaged or take care of themselves physically. In the extreme case, imagine how it would feel to be in a concentration camp where someone else is in control of when and what you eat, when and how you work, when and if you sleep, and who you talk to. And that someone doesn't care how you feel about any of that.

Negativity

It's easy to slip into despair and become addicted to negativity when you feel powerless, believe you are not being heard or validated, or struggle to make ends meet. You can easily fall prey to it yourself, or you can be caught up in an environment in which others are held in its hypnotic trance. It manifests in many ways, such as constant complaining, gossiping, whining, feeling weighed down, experiencing insecurity, or focusing on what's not working instead of looking for solutions. In your job, if you are focused on what is not working or what hasn't worked in the past but neglect to look for solutions, then you find yourself and your department living in the past and not moving forward, which of course will lead to decreased productivity.

Projectivity

When people are unable to take responsibility for their own feelings and actions, they often project their own negativity or bad feelings on others. They will accuse those around them of the feelings that they actually disown in themselves.

"Why are you always so angry?" you ask your boss.

"You're the one who's angry."

"Who me?" you bellow. "I am not angry! Dammit!" We all know someone who does this. Always complaining about how rude or inconsiderate everyone is to them, they fail to recognize the behavior or attitude that they themselves show to others. This can easily be seen in drivers experiencing road rage or people who never get their reports in on time.

Projectivity is a way of refusing to take personal responsibility by blaming others for unacknowledged feelings in oneself.

Reactivity

Those knee-jerk reactions that just come out before you think things through ... do you know anyone in your office who does that? Do you have certain automatic reactions? Anger, revulsion, judgment, annoyance? How do we keep from expressing them?

Holocaust survivor Viktor Frankl says, "Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom." You will learn how to identify that space in which reactive emotions and behaviors are triggered, and how to put a cushion of detachment in between the stimulus and the reaction, so that you have control over your response and experience better results.

The purpose of this book is to help you recognize troubling emotions, patterns, and reactions before they grow out of control and not only damage your personal relationships, but your professional reputation and effectiveness.

Everything you do is changing the world. Every word. Every thought. Every action. What does your impact look like?

Marianne Clyde - mœrtfnneclyde.com

CHAPTER 2

You Can't Run When Your Feet Are Stuck

Through talking to business owners, I discovered that the list of personal problems keeping employees mired in fear — feelings of captivity and negativity — seems endless.

Divorce or marital problems, financial strain, and employee or family member health issues are all on that list. But then again, so are pregnancy and upcoming weddings.

As you can see, not all family issues are negative; some are happy and fun. Yet good or bad, they increase stress levels, providing an opportunity for lack of focus, distraction, or extensive time spent on the phone or computer. All potential energy that ideally would be on the task at hand is diverted and watered down when employees don't practice healthy coping mechanisms, good communication, and conflict resolution skills. And of course, the company needs to provide good communication structure and clear guidelines to keep things as predictable as possible and offer ways to handle the unpredictable.

One of the business owners said, "Secrets are the death of morale because for staff, they mean that management does not trust them." This business owner has 60-90 employees, depending on the season. It is a high-service industry, so if employees are unhappy, chances are huge that negativity will trickle down to the customers, which in turn trickles down to the community, establishing a negative reputation for the business and impacting sales.

Another business owner stresses the need for both happy employees and customers because the "YELP culture" is very stressful. Disgruntled customers and employees can use this online platform to air their grievances, which can damage a company's reputation and ultimately its profits.

Living in Fear

So fear hovers over employees who may not trust management because "secrets" might mean that they are being talked about and not included in the company's future plans. It makes them feel on edge and insecure.

And business owners have to constantly monitor their reputation online where one bad review by a disgruntled employee or customer can take years to redeem. According to the software company Zendesk, this is a valid concern since 88% of customers indicate that they have been influenced by an online customer service review when making a buying decision. While you may not be able to control everything posted online, you can certainly lay the groundwork to minimize negative reviews and unhappy employees, which can influence how a customer feels about your business.

Fear is also present when an employee has to struggle to make ends meet. The focus is not on this particular job, but on looking for another higher-paying job or working a second job. One observant business owner noticed that a particular employee was often quick- tempered and close to tears due to financial pressures. While this employee was doing her best not to let that spill over into her customer service, a wise business owner pays attention and asks questions. Straightforward, direct, and kind communication can solve many problems before they get out of hand.

There is no doubt that sooner or later, the employee's stress levels will cause distraction. For example, she might seek a second job. While this might meet the immediate need of allaying fears about finances, this employee was already working at full capacity, so where would she find time to juggle a second job? The employer wasn't sure. But because the employer addressed the situation before stress levels got out of hand, she provided a safe environment for the employee to discuss her problems, and together they found a way to restructure her pay so that it was more predictable, relieving fears of a less-than-steady income. The stress was immediately lifted from the employee, and the open, trusting communication with the employer set a precedent of flexibility and feelings of a safer, more secure environment.

However, keep in mind that it is not your job to "fix" every employee problem, financial or otherwise. It's important to recognize that your employees should have the ability to figure out their own problems. As the employer, you can offer a safe space to explore those options and offer suggestions, but the employee should choose which option works best for her.

As in any healthy relationship, it's important to hold steady when the other person experiences strong emotions. They might need to struggle with fear, anger, or any other emotion before they work out what is best. You can't fix it by taking away the fear; neither can you fix it by taking on the fear yourself. Hold steady; be kind and flexible if possible, but detach enough to let the other person work out his or her own solution.

Feeling Trapped

When employees feel trapped by finances or lack of opportunity, work begins to look like a prison that inhibits their growth and freedom. Most employees bristle under this feeling of captivity.

Some business leaders address the issue of employees feeling "handcuffed" by a variety of things. Sometimes it is the closing time at day care, where they charge you extra or even kick your child out if you are late too many times. The tension between the need to finish a job and the need to pick up a child creates a lot of stress.

In addition, an employee or executive can feel handcuffed by a contract that is no longer being honored or involves changed circumstances. So it is important to address these changes in circumstances and make modifications when necessary.

On the other hand, one employer indicates that some of his 16 employees actually want "handcuffs" so they don't have to take ownership and be responsible for their actions. However, employees who do take ownership and feel some responsibility for the outcome are far more invested in the company's success and enjoy their work more.

Negativity is Contagious

These feelings of fear or captivity can cause discomfort that spreads: employees begin to mumble under their breath, whisper to other employees, or form cliques that make it difficult to get work done in a synergistic manner. Underlying discontent and lack of communication with managers are important causes of negativity.

But there are also those who bring negativity to the workplace with personal issues of anger, reactivity, and defensiveness that can wreak havoc with relationships among employees. Simply put, if an employee has a personality issue that is causing trouble at home — gossip, anger, sense of superiority, or entitlement — chances are good that it will cause problems at work, and vice versa. Learning good communication skills is vital because habits that create knee- jerk reactions perpetuate themselves. Reactivity and anger lead to defensiveness and projectivity; the combination creates a spiral that turns into a tornado of unhealthy feelings and reactions, while the focus on the job at hand gets lost in the fray.

CHAPTER 3

Becoming Proactive

This section is about how we actually create change in our lives. And let's just get this out up front: you don't make change by continually talking about how bad the problem is. As a matter of fact, that simply makes things worse. If we continue to focus on the problem, it will increase and never go away. We often link so strongly with the problem that it becomes part of our identity.

I am depressed. I'm broke. I hate the lady in the next cubicle. Do you ever find yourself in that trap? Yes, we absolutely have to identify the problem, but only so we know what we have to fix. We don't focus on it to bring blame or to shame anyone. We name it so we can know what to aim for and bring resolution.

Once we have identified the problem, we can set ourselves on the path to resolve it. We need to identify where we want to go.

If we don't want reactivity, negativity, projectivity, or captivity, what is it that we do want? How about connectivity, sensitivity, objectivity, activity, creativity, and productivity?

Connectivity

When there is a thriving synergy in our workplaces, things get done quickly and efficiently, and are often wrapped in an added layer of fun. We like to feel good and included. We like to sense that our contribution is not only accepted, but sought out and valued.

Free to ask questions and consider thoughts that hadn't crossed our minds before, we embrace a new way of thinking and keep our systems flexible and running through economy changes, governmental upsets, and the ever-winding thread of shifting regulations and expectations. The rigid reed breaks.

Connecting with our team in a way where everyone is heard and respected, we find that we become more adaptable to change. When joining with others in a constructive way, making the most of our diversity, personality differences, and variety of skills and talents, we create a better product or service.

(Continues…)

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Excerpted from "Zentivity"
by .
Copyright © 2017 Marianne Clyde.
Excerpted by permission of Balboa Press.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.

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Table of Contents

Foreword, xi,
Acknowledgements, xv,
Introduction: Are You Ready for the Unexpected?, xix,
Part 1: Things that Keep Us Stuck,
Chapter 1: Raising Awareness, 3,
Chapter 2: You Can't Run When Your Feet Are Stuck, 9,
Part 2: Creating the Solution,
Chapter 3: Becoming Proactive, 15,
Chapter 4: Principles to Keep You Centered and Focused, 23,
Chapter 5: Communicating to Connect, 39,
Chapter 6: Now You See It. Now You Don't!, 45,
Chapter 7: Establishing a Firm Foundation for Change, 55,
Chapter 8: Implementing Healthy Practices in the Workplace, 65,
Part 3: Productivity,
Chapter 9: Happy Employees, Happy Bottom Line, 73,
Chapter 10: Achieving Zentivity, 81,