You Can't Please Everyone!

by Ellen Flanagan Burns, Tracy Bishop (Illustrator)

Overview

This is a hopeful, helpful story for kids who need reassurance that they can be nice to others and be true to themselves.  

Ellie feels like she is disappointing people if she says “no.” One way or another, she thinks she is hurting someone’s feelings. Or she puts other people’s wants or needs in front of her own. With help from her parents and her teacher, Ellie finds the strength to be honest with people and do the right thing for herself by learning how to say “no.”

Dear Reader
Chapter One: Put on the Spot
Chapter Two: Heavy Feelings
Chapter Three: Jenna the Jacket
Chapter Four: Empty Cup
Chapter Five: It’s Not My Job to Pick Your Ice Cream
Chapter Six: It’s Okay to Say No
Chapter Seven: Not Guilty
Chapter Eight: Doing the Right Thing, Not the Pleasing Thing
Chapter Nine: Friends for Life

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781433839252
Publisher:	American Psychological Association
Publication date:	05/03/2022
Sold by:	Barnes & Noble
Format:	eBook
Pages:	64
File size:	6 MB
Age Range:	8 - 12 Years

About the Author

Ellen Flanagan Burns is a school psychologist and the author of The Tallest Bridge in the World: A Story for Children About Social Anxiety, Nobody's Perfect: A Story for Children About Perfectionism, and Ten Turtles on Tuesday; A Story for Children About Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder. She devotes her writing to helping children overcome anxiety. She believes that children's books can be a powerful therapeutic tool and supports cognitive-based interventions for children with anxiety-related issues. She lives in Newark, Delaware. Visit @ellensbooks on Instagram.

Tracy Nishimura Bishop has a degree from San Jose University in graphic design, with a focus on illustration and animation, and is the illustrator of more than 20 children’s books. She lives in San Jose, California. Visit tracybishop.com and @tracybishopart on Instagram and Twitter.

Table of Contents

Dear Reader
Chapter One: Put on the Spot
Chapter Two: Heavy Feelings
Chapter Three: Jenna the Jacket
Chapter Four: Empty Cup
Chapter Five: It’s Not My Job to Pick Your Ice Cream
Chapter Six: It’s Okay to Say No
Chapter Seven: Not Guilty
Chapter Eight: Doing the Right Thing, Not the Pleasing Thing
Chapter Nine: Friends for Life

Editorial Reviews

2022-03-02
The earnest tale of a girl who just can’t say no.

Ellie is a people-pleaser—the thought of disappointing others petrifies her. When faced with the choice of cancelling her own plans or telling a friend she can’t do an activity, she’ll always opt in favor of the friend. Caring people in Ellie’s life begin to notice her self-sabotaging behavior. There’s Rosie, a new girl at school, who notices that Ellie’s people-pleasing is making her unhappy. There’s Ellie’s mom, who knows Ellie would rather paint than put her plans on pause for her blithely oblivious friend Sam. Only when Ellie has a talk with her parents does she own up to her problem and begin conveying her true feelings and preferences. Authorial advice prefaces the story, providing useful context, but some of it is delivered with too broad a brush. For example, unable to dole out much more than generalities, Flanagan Burns urges child readers to ditch toxic friendships and “find friends who lift you up, not bring you own. Find friends who like you just the way you are.” Would that it were so simple. The writing is straightforward and serviceable. Simple illustrations in earth colors depict Ellie as White, Rosie as Black, and other classmates as racially diverse.

A worthwhile, if sometimes heavy-handed, primer on setting boundaries, but the storytelling feels rote. (Chapter book. 7-10)

Kirkus Reviews