Table of Contents
Introduction Aging Ain't for Sissies 13
Part 1 Mind
Chapter 1 How Old Would You Be If You Didn't Know How Old You Are? 21
Chapter 2 Six Sure Signs I'm Aging 31
Chapter 3 Old Age! Are We There Yet? 39
Chapter 4 Strollers. Cars, and Wheelchairs! 47
Chapter 5 I'm Not Old: I'm 45 Plus Shipping and Handling 59
Chapter 6 Not Only Is My Short-Term Memory Bad. So Is My Short-Term Memory 67
Part 2 Body
Chapter 7 Why Can 11 Lose Weight Like I Lose My Keys, Phone, and Sex Drive? 85
Chapter 8 Strong Is the New Skinny 105
Chapter 9 Become the CEO of Your Health 113
Chapter 10 Think Like a Doctor 125
Chapter 11 A Heart-To-Heart About Your Heart 133
Chapter 12 Keep Moving! It's Harder for the Undertaker to Catch Up with You 141
Chapter 13 We're Basically a Houseplant with More Complicated Emotions: Why We Need Water 155
Chapter 14 Sometimes I Laugh So Hard, Tears Run Down My Leg 167
Chapter 15 Sleeping Beauty Was On to Something 179
Chapter 16 Did You Know Chocolate Makes Your Clothes Shrink? 191
Part 3 Soul
Chapter 17 Will It Matter Five Years from Now? 207
Chapter 18 Life Would Be Easier with Piñatas Placed Throughout the Day 225
Chapter 19 Mistakes & Regrets: It's Time to Let Them Go! 241
Chapter 20 When There are Lumps in the Road 251
Chapter 21 Decline to Decline 257
Chapter 22 Friends Are Therapists You Can Drink With 269
Chapter 23 An Attitude of Gratitude 275
Chapter 24 Be the Person You Want to Have Lunch With 281
Chapter 25 Be Happy; It Drives People Crazy 291
Chapter 26 I Want to Be Cremated: It's My Last Chance for a Smokin' Hot Body 307
Chapter 27 It's Never Too Late to Be the Person You Want to Be 323
Acknowledgments 327
Index 331