Read an Excerpt
When Mom and Dad Divorce
A Kid's Resource
By Emily Menendez-Aponte, R. W. Alley Abbey Press
Copyright © 1999 Emily Menendez-Aponte
All rights reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-4976-8297-9
CHAPTER 1
Lots of Things Are Changing
When your mom and dad get a divorce, it may feel like your life has just been turned upsidedown. It's hard to think that the two people in the world who you love most don't love each other anymore.
So many things are changing all at once. In the middle of everything, you may wonder: "What's going to happen to ME?" Tell your parents what you wonder and worry about.
It's Not Your Fault
Parents get divorced for lots of different reasons—grown-up reasons. You may have seen or heard your parents fighting. They may have loud fights, or they may have quiet fights and not talk to each other much.
Whatever the reason for your parents' divorce, IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT. Your parents aren't getting divorced because you did something wrong. And there is nothing you can do better or differently to keep them from getting divorced. Sometimes it's just better for parents not to be married to each other anymore.
Your Parents Still Love You
Many things in your life are changing right now, but one thing will always stay the same—your parents will always love you.
Even if one of your parents doesn't live in the same house as you, you still have a mom and a dad. You still have two parents to love and care for you.
Though your parents may not love each other anymore, they both still love you very much. Parents only divorce each other. They don't divorce you!
All of Your Feelings
You might have all kinds of different feelings about what's happening in your life. You may be really angry, upset, or sad. Or maybe you are scared, worried, or confused.
It's okay to have these feelings—whatever they are. Many kids whose parents are going through a divorce have these same kinds of feelings.
Let yourself feel the way you feel. Talk about it with your mom or dad. It will take some time to sort through all your feelings.
Feeling Better
Remember that it's okay to cry when you are upset. Letting your feelings out can help you to feel better.
Doing things you like might also help you feel better. Drawing or playing with a favorite toy can help. Hugs can help, too. When you are upset, get a big hug from someone you love.
Talk to People
It's good to talk to people about what you are feeling. It's not good to keep all of your feelings hidden inside you.
Besides your mom or dad, it might help to talk with other grown-ups in your life, like a grandparent or teacher.
Your mom or dad might ask you to talk to a "counselor." A counselor is someone who helps people with their problems. You don't need to be embarrassed. Counselors are very good at listening and they can really help.
(Continues...)
Excerpted from When Mom and Dad Divorce by Emily Menendez-Aponte, R. W. Alley. Copyright © 1999 Emily Menendez-Aponte. Excerpted by permission of Abbey Press.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
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