Upside Down: Understanding and Supporting Attachment in Adoptive Families

by Shannon Guerra

Overview

Adoptive families working through attachment issues often feel alone. It doesn't have to be this way, though.

The communities around them want to help, yet they usually don't know how to help when it comes to attachment issues.

A little perspective can change all of that.

Upside Down shares stories from dozens of families healing through the spectrum of attachment issues, from general attachment concerns to Reactive Attachment Disorder. It demonstrates ways adoptive families can explain these often invisible special needs to the community around them, and also shows how these communities can provide support without causing more damage to a hurting child and further isolating the families working so hard to heal them.

Topics include:

- the reality behind the rose-tinted movies

- the why behind the weird limits

- the tangle of community

- what adoptive families really want...besides coffee

- sample letters for care providers

- links and further resources

The message of Upside Down is two-fold: Adoptive families are not alone, and the communities around them can be equipped to make sure they never feel that way again.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781512759624
Publisher:	WestBow Press
Publication date:	01/17/2017
Pages:	92
Product dimensions:	5.00(w) x 8.00(h) x 0.22(d)

About the Author

Shannon Guerra is a lifelong Alaskan who stays warm by running around after her six children and drinking ridiculous amounts of tea and coffee. She loves to read Dickens, Austen, C. S. Lewis, and her children's handwriting. Shannon passionately believes in God's extravagant love for humanity and His desire to speak and move through His people. She and Vince have been married since 1997, and they enjoy hiking, watching movies, ministering through prayer, reading, and snapping each other with kitchen towels, to the shocked amusement of their kids.

Shannon writes in (mostly) complete sentences at copperlightwood.com.

Editorial Reviews

2017-06-06
A candid self-help book about forming bonds with adopted children. Guerra (Upside Down, 2014) uses a pragmatic, straightforward voice to address the challenges that stem from attachment issues with adopted kids. She's an adoptive mother herself, and a key aspect of her approach—limiting kids' interactions with outside adults—seems counterintuitive, she says, and it's often not understood by those outside adoptive families. Due to past traumas, adopted kids often experience confusion about whom they can trust, the author says, and they often have difficulty attaching to their new parents. As a result, they can develop manipulative behaviors in an attempt to feel in control. Interactions with well-meaning adults can then lead to setbacks—troublesome behaviors that can last for weeks. The book illustrates its central concept with many examples from Guerra's and other adoptive family members' own lives. It also talks through the sometimes-trying realities of life in an adoptive family, contrasting them with "rose-tinted" fictional portrayals of the experience. The author establishes why limits are necessary, how to recognize and respond to difficult behaviors, how to deal with judgmental members of the larger community, and how others can help. The author's many references to Christianity underscore how her faith has been an integral part of her parenting experience. The book might have benefited from early, precise definitions of what the author describes as "the entire spectrum ranging from general attachment issues to Reactive Attachment Disorder," to assist the uninitiated. That said, she does helpfully include information on further resources and is adept at illustrating ideas with metaphors. For example, in the second chapter, Guerra uses the metaphor of a plaster cast, noting that "the broken child is set into their family for healing and protection," and "their sharp edges must be treated with care." Perhaps most importantly, this book reminds adoptive parents that it is acceptable, and even expected, to be imperfect and sometimes overwhelmed. A thoughtful, faith-based read that provides engaging insights on attachment issues.

Kirkus Reviews