The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred, the Vampire Accountant

by Drew Hayes

Overview

Some people are born boring. Some live boring. Some even die boring. Fred managed to do all three, and when he woke up as a vampire, he did so as a boring one. Timid, socially awkward, and plagued by self-esteem issues, Fred has never been the adventurous sort.

One fateful night – different from the night he died, which was more inconvenient than fateful – Fred reconnects with an old friend at his high school reunion. This rekindled relationship sets off a chain of events thrusting him right into the chaos that is the parahuman world, a world with chipper zombies, truck driver wereponies, maniacal necromancers, ancient dragons, and now one undead accountant trying his best to “survive.” Because even after it’s over, life can still be a downright bloody mess.

Product Details

BN ID:	2940046073843
Publisher:	REUTS Publications, LLC
Publication date:	07/29/2014
Sold by:	Smashwords
Format:	eBook
Sales rank:	116,667
File size:	607 KB
Age Range:	18 Years

About the Author

Drew Hayes is an aspiring author from Texas who has written several books and found the gumption to publish a few (so far). He graduated from Texas Tech with a B.A. in English, because evidently he’s not familiar with what the term “employable” means. Drew has been called one of the most profound, prolific, and talented authors of his generation, but a table full of drunks will say almost anything when offered a round of free shots. Drew feels kind of like a D-bag writing about himself in the third person like this. He does appreciate that you’re still reading, though.

Drew would like to sit down and have a beer with you. Or a cocktail. He’s not here to judge your preferences. Drew is terrible at being serious, and has no real idea what a snippet biography is meant to convey anyway. Drew thinks you are awesome just the way you are. That part, he meant. Drew is off to go high-five random people, because who doesn’t love a good high-five? No one, that’s who.

Editorial Reviews

"[Kirby] provides a good range of character voices for the various monsters, which capture the creatures' strangeness." ---AudioFile

From the Publisher

Fred just wanted to live a calm afterlife as an accountant who happens to be a vampire. But his high school friend, Krystal, has other plans for him as she takes him on a series of adventures involving all sorts of monsters. Kirby Heyborne narrates this first-person narrative with a good vocal balance, which can be challenging for this production. Initially, Fred is supposed to be a flat character, but Heyborne balances Fred's flatness with a stronger inflection during the narrative passages. He also provides a good range of character voices for the various monsters, which capture the creatures’ strangeness without distracting from the story. L.E. © AudioFile 2015, Portland, Maine

APRIL 2015 - AudioFile