The Journey of Forgiveness: Fulfilling The Healing Process

by Carolyn Baker

Overview

THE JOURNEY OF FORGIVENESS: Fulfilling The Healing Process, first and foremost, emphasizes the process nature of forgiveness. The author, a former psychotherapist, has come to believe that forgiveness is not an event willed by an ego which desires to be free of guilt, which may long for connection with those who have harmed oneself, or which hopes to comply with the admonitions modern awareness gurus. Rather, forgiveness, the author insists, is a conscious journey requiring a thorough knowledge of the offense(s) and its effects, as well as the most essential pre-requisite, self-forgiveness. The book offers a compassionate yet courageous challenge to look deeply into the wounds inflicted, the emotional and spiritual effects of the wounds, and the psyche of the offender(s) in order to enter and complete what is nothing less than a daunting rite of passage. The author's style, poignant, poetic, and frequently disturbing, relentlessly dispels all illusions of quick-fix forgiveness but offers supportive, no-nonsense exercises for embarking on a life-changing, transformative journey.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781469767291
Publisher:	iUniverse, Incorporated
Publication date:	12/19/2000
Sold by:	Barnes & Noble
Format:	eBook
Pages:	204
File size:	219 KB

Table of Contents

	Introduction	xi
	It is I Who Must Begin	xvii
Chapter 1	Do I Want to Forgive?	3
	Misconceptions about Forgiveness	4
	Forgiving and Forgetting?	6
Chapter 2	The University of Life	9
	Reality's Many Layers	10
	Lifetime Homework	11
	Seeing in Cycles	12
	Letting Go: Is it Possible?	12
	Necessary Allies	13
Chapter 3	Initiatory Vision	17
	Initiation in the Modern World	18
	The Pattern of Initiation	18
	Suffering or Pain?	19
	The Purpose of Initiation	20
Chapter 4	Being Carried	25
Chapter 5	To Forgive or not to Forgive?	39
	Permission not to Forgive	39
	"Wrong" Reasons for Forgiving	40
	The Importance of Motive	42
	Exercise: Exploring Motives for Forgiving	43
Chapter 6	Forgiving Oneself	47
	The Essential Element of Compassion	48
	Exploring One's Own Dark Side	48
	The Essential Element of Suffering	49
	The "Right" Reason to Forgive	51
	Exercise: Reflecting on the Offense and the Offender	51
Chapter 7	On the Way to My Mother's Funeral	55
	A Story of Self-Forgiveness	57
	Rituals of Forgiveness	64
	Forgiveness as "Birthing"	65
	Things are not Always as They Seem	67
	Self-Forgiveness Inventory Exercise	70
	Exercise for "Giving Birth"	71
	An Exercise for Developing Compassion	72
Chapter 8	Layers of Forgiveness	75
	Foregoing	76
	Forebearing	77
	Forgetting	78
	Forgiving	79
	The Presence of the Divine	81
	The Body Knows More	82
	Exercise: Exploring the Layers	82
Chapter 9	How Do I Know if I have Forgiven	85
	Finding Meaning	88
	Mythic Suffering	90
	Exercise: Writing Your Story	91
Chapter 10	Forgiving the Unforgivable	95
	Transforming the Power of Victimhood	99
	Exercise: A Forgiveness Inventory	102
Chapter 11	The Cost of Forgiveness	105
	The Transformation of Ego	106
	Unforeseen Losses	114
	Journeys and Sub-Journeys	122
	The Alchemy of Forgiveness	123
	Another Personal Experience	125
	The Necessity of Exploring the Darkness	129
	Exercise: Forgiveness Fears	131
Chapter 12	The Soul of Forgiveness	135
	The Difference Between Soul and Spirit	136
	Soul and Forgiveness	137
	Soul's Messiness	140
	Soul's Danger	142
	Soul's Safety	145
	Exercise: Forgiveness and Your Soul	150
Chapter 13	Cultivating Accountability: Forgiveness in the World	153
	The Shadow Erupts in America	155
	The Shadow Recedes	156
	The Soul of Collective Repentance	158
Chapter 14	When the Offender is Me	165
	The Daunting Challenge of Accountability	168
	Exercise: A Moral Inventory	173
Chapter 15	Outcome Unknown	177
	About the Author	185