Read an Excerpt
There was once a charming little devil who was red all over, with two little black horns and two bat-wings. His daddy was a big green devil and his mother a black she-devil. All three of them lived together in a place called Hell, which can be found right in the centre of Planet Earth.
Hell is not like how it is round here. Indeed, it’s quite the opposite: everything that here we think is good, is considered bad in Hell; and everything that here we think is bad, is considered good down there. This is why, officially, devils are supposed to be wicked. For them, it’s good to be bad.
But our little devil, well he wanted to be good, and so he was the despair of his whole family.
Every evening when he came home from school, his father would ask him:
"What did you do today?"?
"I went to school."
?"What an idiot! Had you done all your homework?"
"Yes, Papa."
?"What a dummy! Had you learnt your lessons?"
"Yes, Papa."
?"Miserable child! You have at least, I hope, wasted a few hours?"
"Mmm..."
"Did you fight with any of your little schoolfriends?"
"No, Papa."
?"Did you flick some balls of soggy paper at them while the teacher wasn’t looking?"
"No, Papa."
"You didn’t even think of putting drawing pins on your teacher’s chair so that he pricked his bottom when he sat down?"
"No, Papa."
?"In that case, what did you do?"
?"Well, I did a dictation, two maths problems, a bit of history, some geography..."?
Hearing this, the poor daddy devil held his horns in both hands, as if he felt like tearing them out, and shook his head:
"What did I do to deserve such a child? When I think of the years your mother and I have spent, what we sacrificed to give you a bad education, to set you a bad example, to help you grow up into a fine, tall and wicked devil! But no! Instead of giving in to temptation, this young gentleman has to cause trouble! In fact, let’s think seriously: what would you like to do when you’re grown up?"
"I’d like to be nice," replied the little devil.
Of course, his mother wept and his father punished him. But there was nothing to be done: the little devil stuck to his plan. In the end, his father told him:
"My poor child, I despair of you. I would have liked you to grow up to be Someone, but I see now that it’s impossible. Only this week, you came top in maths! In view of this, I have decided to take you out of school and make you an apprentice. You shall never be worse than a minor imp, a mere boiler-room stove-stoker... A shame for you, but it is your own fault!"
