The Anger Toolkit: Quick Tools to Manage Intense Emotions and Keep Your Cool
128
The Anger Toolkit: Quick Tools to Manage Intense Emotions and Keep Your Cool
128eBook
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Overview
A quick-relief guide for calming anger in the moment—just when you need it most.
Do you struggle with problem anger? If so, you are far from alone. Sometimes anger can be a helpful emotion. It pushes us to stand up for ourselves or the people we care about—or to advocate for a cause we believe in. But sometimes, anger can become intense and overwhelming, and lead us to act in destructive or harmful ways—impacting relationships, work, and our health. So, how can you take charge of your anger before it gets the best of you?
Written by a team of anger experts, The Anger Toolkit offers evidence-based anger-cooling skills, exercises, and tools drawn from cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), and acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT). With this powerfully effective pocket guide, you’ll learn to:
- Find calm right away with “emergency” anger management skills
- Understand your anger, as well as your anger triggers
- Get unstuck from anger before it gets the best of you
- Be good to yourself by creating a life where your physical and emotional well-being are high priorities
If you’re ready to stop letting anger rule your life, this easy-to-use guide has everything you need to stay calm, cool, and in charge of your emotions.
Product Details
| ISBN-13: | 9781648481352 |
|---|---|
| Publisher: | New Harbinger Publications |
| Publication date: | 01/02/2023 |
| Sold by: | Barnes & Noble |
| Format: | eBook |
| Pages: | 128 |
| File size: | 963 KB |
About the Author
Matthew McKay, PhD, is a professor at the Wright Institute in Berkeley, CA. He has authored and coauthored numerous self-help books, including The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook, Self-Esteem, and Couple Skills, which have sold more than four million copies combined. He received his PhD in clinical psychology from the California School of Professional Psychology, and specializes in the cognitive behavioral treatment of anxiety and depression.
Peter Rogers, PhD, (1941–2004), was administrative director of Haight Ashbury Psychological Services. He coauthored When Anger Hurts, The Divorce Book, The Anger Control Workbook, and The Community Building Companion.
Ronald T. Potter-Efron, MSW, PhD, is a psychotherapist in private practice in Eau Claire, WI; who specializes in anger management, mental health counseling, and the treatment of addictions. He is author of Angry All the Time and Stop the Anger Now, and coauthor of The Secret Message of Shame.
Patricia S. Potter-Efron, MS, is a clinical psychotherapist at First Things First Counseling Center in Eau Claire, WI. She is coauthor of Letting Go of Shame and The Secret Message of Shame, as well as several professional books on anger and shame.
William J. Knaus, EdD, is a licensed psychologist with more than forty-six years of clinical experience working with people suffering from anxiety, depression, and procrastination. He has appeared on numerous regional and national television shows, including The Today Show, and more than one hundred radio shows. His ideas have appeared in national magazines such as U.S. News & World Report and Good Housekeeping, and major newspapers such as The Washington Post and the Chicago Tribune. He is one of the original directors of postdoctoral psychotherapy training in rational emotive behavior therapy (REBT). Knaus is author or coauthor of more than twenty-five books, including The Cognitive Behavioral Workbook for Anxiety, The Cognitive Behavioral Workbook for Depression, and The Procrastination Workbook.
Alexander L. Chapman, PhD, RPsych, is professor and coordinator of the clinical science area in the psychology department at Simon Fraser University in Canada, as well as a registered psychologist and president of the DBT Centre of Vancouver. Chapman directs the Personality and Emotion Research and Treatment laboratory, where he studies the role of emotion regulation in borderline personality disorder (BPD), self-harm, impulsivity, as well as other related issues. His research is currently funded by major grants from the Canadian Institutes of Health Research. Chapman has received the Young Investigator’s Award from the National Education Alliance for Borderline Personality Disorder (NEABDP), the Canadian Psychological Association’s Scientist Practitioner Early Career Award, and a Career Investigator award from the Michael Smith Foundation for Health Research. He has coauthored ten books, three of which received the 2012 Association for Behavioral and Cognitive Therapies’ Self-Help Book Seal of Merit Award. Board certified in cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) (Canadian Association for Cognitive and Behavioral Therapies) and dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) (DBT®-Linehan Board of Certification), Chapman cofounded a large psychology practice, and regularly gives workshops and presentations to clinicians and community groups both nationally and internationally. He also has been practicing martial arts, Zen, and mindfulness meditation for many years, and enjoys cooking, hiking, skiing, and spending time with his wife and sons.
Kim L. Gratz, PhD, is professor and chair of the department of psychology at the University of Toledo. Gratz directs the Personality and Emotion Research and Treatment laboratory, in which she conducts laboratory and treatment outcome research focused on the role of emotion dysregulation in the pathogenesis and treatment of BPD, self-injury, and other risky behaviors. Gratz has received multiple awards for her research on personality disorders, including the Young Investigator’s Award from the NEABPD in 2005, and the Mid-Career Investigator Award from the North American Society for the Study of Personality Disorders in 2015. She has been continuously funded since 2003 (with continuous federal funding as principal investigator since 2008), and has authored more than 145 peer-reviewed publications and six books on BPD, self-injury, and DBT.
Matthew McKay, PhD, is a professor at the Wright Institute in Berkeley, CA. He has authored and coauthored numerous books, including The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook, Self-Esteem, and Couple Skills, which have sold more than a million copies combined. He received his PhD in clinical psychology from the California School of Professional Psychology, and specializes in the cognitive behavioral treatment of anxiety and depression.
Peter Rogers, PhD, was the administrative director of Haight Ashbury Psychological Services. He was the coauthor of When Anger Hurts, The Divorce Book, The Anger Control Workbook,and The Community Building Companion.
Ronald T. Potter-Efron, MSW, PhD, is a psychotherapist in private practice in Eau Claire, WI, who specializes in anger management, mental health counseling, and the treatment of addictions. He is the author of Angry All the Time and Stop the Anger Now and coauthor of The Secret Message of Shame and Anger, Alcoholism, and Addiction.
Patricia S. Potter-Efron, MS, is a clinical psychotherapist at First Things First Counseling Center in Eau Claire, WI. She is coauthor of Letting Go of Shame and The Secret Message of Shame, as well as several professional books on anger and shame.
William J. Knaus, EdD, is a licensed psychologist with more than forty-six years of clinical experience working with people suffering from anxiety, depression, and procrastination. He has appeared on numerous regional and national television shows, including The Today Show, and more than one hundred radio shows. His ideas have appeared in national magazines such as U.S. News & World Report and Good Housekeeping, and major newspapers such as The Washington Post and Chicago Tribune. He is one of the original directors of postdoctoral psychotherapy training in rational emotive behavior therapy (REBT). Knaus is author or coauthor of more than twenty-five books, including The Cognitive Behavioral Workbook for Anxiety, The Cognitive Behavioral Workbook for Depression, and The Procrastination Workbook.
Alexander L. Chapman, PhD, RPsych, is professor, director of clinical training, and coordinator of the clinical science area in the psychology department at Simon Fraser University in Canada, as well as a registered psychologist and president of the DBT Centre of Vancouver. Chapman directs the Personality and Emotion Research Lab, where he studies the role of emotion regulation in borderline personality disorder (BPD), self-harm, impulsivity, as well as other related issues. His research has been funded by major grants from the Canadian Institutes of Health Research. Chapman has received the Young Investigator’s Award from the National Education Alliance for Borderline Personality Disorder (NEABPD), the Canadian Psychological Association’s Scientist Practitioner Early Career Award, and a Career Investigator award from the Michael Smith Foundation for Health Research.
Chapman has coauthored twelve books for consumers and clinicians. Board certified in cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) (Canadian Association for Cognitive and Behavioral Therapies) and dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) (DBT-Linehan Board of Certification), Chapman cofounded a psychology practice focused on DBT, and regularly gives workshops and presentations to clinicians and community groups both nationally and internationally. He also has been practicing martial arts and mindfulness meditation for many years, and enjoys cooking, reading, outdoor activities, and spending time with his family.
Kim L. Gratz, PhD, is a senior clinical quality manager and clinical lead of the DBT program at Lyra Health. She also maintains an appointment in the department of psychology at the University of Toledo, where she previously served as professor and chair. Gratz directs the Personality and Emotion Research Lab, where her laboratory and treatment outcome research focus on the role of emotion dysregulation in BPD, suicidal and nonsuicidal self-injury, and substance use, as well as the intergenerational transmission of BPD-relevant mechanisms. Gratz has received multiple awards for her research on personality disorders and self-injury, including the Young Investigator’s Award from the NEABPD in 2005, the Mid-Career Investigator Award from the North American Society for the Study of Personality Disorders in 2015, and the President’s Award for Excellence in Creative and Scholarly Activity from the University of Toledo in 2022. She was also recognized by the University of Toledo Catharine S. Eberly Center for Women as an Influential Woman (Innovator) for her research on BPD, self-injury, and emotion regulation. She has been continuously funded since 2003 (with continuous federal funding as principal investigator from 2008-2020), and has authored more than 240 peer-reviewed publications and seven books on BPD, self-injury, and DBT.
Table of Contents
Introduction 1
Part 1 Get Anger Relief Right Away
1 Stop Blaming Yourself 6
2 Anger and Its Costs 8
3 Act the Opposite 10
4 Take a Good Time-Out 13
5 Mindfully Attend to Your Anger 15
6 Replace Negative Thoughts with Positive Ones 18
7 Breathing and Relaxing in Stressful Situations 20
8 Anger Invitations 23
9 Defuse a Potential Conflict 25
10 Twenty-Four-Hour Commitment to Act Calm 29
Part 2 Understanding Your Anger
11 Your Anger Cues 34
12 Physical Sensations That Go Along with Anger 37
13 Thoughts That Go Along with Anger 39
14 Actions That Go Along with Anger 41
15 The Short Fuse Problem 44
16 Managing Intensity by Rating Your Anger 46
17 Reacting Too Quickly or Strongly 48
18 Getting Too Angry to Listen 51
19 Becoming Resentful 54
20 Knowing Your Payoffs 57
Part 3 Getting Unstuck from Anger
21 Avoiding Anger as a Permanent Condition 62
22 Don't Let Anger Drive the Bus 63
23 Identify the Feelings Underneath Your Anger 65
24 Three Strategies to Cope with Painful Feelings 67
25 Putting Yourself in Someone Else's Shoes 70
26 Deep Breathing 73
27 Progressive Muscle Relaxation 75
28 Using I-Statements 78
29 Fair-Fighting Guidelines 81
30 Deep Resentments and the Need to Forgive 83
31 Anger-Turned-Inward and Self-Forgiveness Challenges 86
Part 4 Being Good to Yourself
32 TLC (Tired, Lonely, Craving) Issues 90
33 Put a Cork in the Self-Hating Voice 92
34 Find Core Qualities in Yourself That You Value 94
35 Practice Acceptance 98
36 Nourish Yourself 102
37 Self-Soothing Skills 106
38 Managing Guilt 109
39 Managing Shame 112
40 Practicing Self-Compassion 114
Moving Forward 116
Further Reading 118
References 119