★ 03/20/2023
Actor Kelly recalls her far-from-privileged upbringing and reflects on the skills that helped her survive it in this heart-stopping debut. In nonlinear vignettes, Kelly recounts her chaotic childhood as the daughter of an addict—which she paints in stark contrast to her breakout role as pampered Friday Night Lights cheerleader Lyla Garrity—and recalls her intense longing “to have a regular mom who did regular things.” She bounced from one stranger’s home to another, stayed in storage units, and endured ruthless bullying, eventually working in a peep show as a teenager to earn enough money for her first apartment. Resisting pressure to undergo cosmetic surgery for the sake of her budding entertainment career, Kelly instead trained as a surgical nurse, resolving that “my career as an actress can vanish tomorrow, but no one will ever be able to take away from me what I can do with my mind and my hands.” She also details moving reunions as an adult with her father, Aerosmith guitarist Rick Duffay, and her mother, with whom she made peace before she died of cancer. Despite sometimes horrific obstacles, Kelly resists painting herself as a victim, instead suffusing her story with gratitude and humility. It’s an immensely moving story of one woman’s unconquerable spirit. (May)
04/01/2023
Raised by a single mother who was also a stripper and experienced addiction, Kelly's upbringing was laced with domestic violence, drug abuse, and sexual abuse. Her eventual celebrity and success as an actress on Friday Night Lights are mere footnotes in this memoir that is otherwise her coming to terms with the neglect and turmoil of her childhood. With extremely brief moments of optimism sprinkled solely in its final chapters, Kelly openly exposes her most complicated relationships and how they shaped her into someone habitually attracted to chaos. Recounting recurring trauma and abuse, she attempts to break free of a difficult past. But the retelling of these memories is neither educational nor inspirational; they are simply deeply upsetting. Her introspection into her past is ultimately the defense and justification of the adults responsible for her troubled childhood—a roller coaster ride of one minute praising them for their affection, the next sparing no detail about her abuse and abandonment. It's clear she's still navigating their long-term consequences. VERDICT Use caution when recommending this particular celebrity memoir. It should come with a trigger warning, considering its cover-to-cover instances of abuse, neglect, drug use, violence, and trauma.—Alana R. Quarles
2023-02-11
An actor’s account of growing up with her erratic single mother.
Beautiful and childlike, Kelly’s mother, Maureen, was a charming drug addict who treated her daughter like her “favorite playmate.” Maureen thought nothing of taking Minka with her to the Hollywood strip club where she worked or home with the men on whom she depended. They moved often, sometimes living in places like storage units and friends’ garages; yet Maureen, “who brought the party wherever she went,” always managed to turn difficulty into a magical adventure. By the time the author was in middle school, Maureen, who had worn out her welcome with every friend in Los Angeles, decided to move to Albuquerque to stay with the bighearted Mexican American family of an ex-lover named David. Kelly readily embraced the warmth of her new environment and learned how to fight against those who bullied her for being a “white girl.” At the same time, she began repeating her mother’s patterns of behavior by seeking out men “to confirm my worth.” When her mother and David suddenly left Albuquerque when Kelly was 16, she began working in a peep show for money to live independently before going to LA with the help of her estranged father. There, she became a scrub nurse, fell out with her increasingly volatile mother, and studied acting. Not long into her new life, Kelly received invitations to do commercials and guest appearances on TV shows, and then she landed a starring role in the hit series Friday Night Lights. Rather than shield Kelly from her past, however, fame forced her into an excruciating but necessary confrontation with it and her troubled—and now dying—mother. The author is not shy about discussing difficult topics, and this candid text will appeal to Kelly’s fans and to readers seeking a courageous story of self-acceptance.
A generous and humane memoir.
A Washington Post best celebrity memoir of 2023
An Audible best celebrity memoir of 2023
“An intricate portrait . . . vulnerable, self-aware and admirably introspective.”
—The Washington Post
“Tell Me Everything is honest, nuanced, and completely gripping…The result is a stunner of a celebrity memoir: unexpected and moving, with a storyline that could easily power a prestige drama.”
—Harper’s Bazaar
“I’m struck by how Minka manages to preserve an intelligent curiosity even when describing moments of the most egregious neglect. This generous tone allows the reader to see Minka the girl and Minka the woman together on the page at the same time, and to observe the triumph of her struggle. It’s a space of hard-won clarity, a grace-filled investigation of all that she and her mom endured. I feel lucky to have read this book.”
—Lacy Crawford, author of Notes on a Silencing
“Tell Me Everything is a gorgeous debut that transcends the celebrity category.”
—Elle
“[A] heart-stopping debut…suffuse[d] with gratitude and humility…An immensely moving story of one woman’s unconquerable spirit.”
—Publishers Weekly, *starred*
“Minka Kelly seeks and destroys any preconceived expectations we may have over who she is and where she came from. Tell Me Everything is an epic tale of survival, family, and love; a Little Red Riding Hood fable set deep in the heart of strip clubs, garage apartments, rock stars, of a brave little girl trying to not get eaten by the big bad wolves.”
—Peter Berg, writer, director, and creator of Friday Night Lights
“Tell Me Everything is a timely, urgent portrait of working-class American women, told through the emotionally gripping story of a mother and daughter you will fall in love with. A brave and necessary book that shows you how to survive, overcome, and ultimately heal from the universal hardships facing women today. A must-read.”
—Gabrielle Union, New York Times bestselling author of We’re Going to Need More Wine and You Got Anything Stronger?
“Tell Me Everything is a powerful and passionate tale about Minka Kelly’s unlikely path from childhood trauma and neglect to a life of resilience, wonder, and hope. Against all odds, Minka rose above the ashes of her past and soared like a phoenix, heading straight toward the light. This is exactly the kind of book we need right now.”
–Mira Bartók, author of The Memory Palace
“From living out of a storage room, to being passed off from one unfamiliar grown-up to the next, to earning straight As in nursing school and assisting in surgeries, to filming a hit TV show—Minka Kelly does with her past what great memoirists do: excavates how it influences her present. Tell Me Everything is a propulsive book with impeccable insight and compassion, showing what happens when love and abuse come into conflict. It’s also a moving love story about a mother and daughter. Tell Me Everything proves Minka Kelly can do almost anything.”
—Jeannie Vanasco, author of Things We Didn't Talk About When I Was a Girl and The Glass Eye
“Tell Me Everything is a fascinating, intense, horrifying, witty, wise, and often funny story of transformation. From persistent, unpredictable childhood neglect and abuse to stardom with the raw twists and turns, and ups and downs along the way, Minka Kelly’s story can inspire anyone to whom life has been unfair. As a psychiatrist for more than 40 years, I applaud the hard work Minka has done, and her ability to share it with sometimes brutal honesty and love. I highly recommend it.”
—Dr. Daniel Amen, founder of Amen Clinics and author of Change Your Brain Every Day
“A generous and humane memoir.”
—Kirkus Reviews
