Slow to Judge: Sometimes It?s OK to Listen

by David Capes, Refraction

Overview

God invites us to judge and to help correct wrongs from a place of understanding. Sometimes we pre-judge a person based on our own biases and superficial experiences. We stifle dialog before the conversation even begins. If all we know is our own faith, and we never put it side-by-side with what others believe, our spiritual growth and commitments can be easily stunted. By truly listening and learning from those with different beliefs, we can broaden and deepen our kingdom commitments.

It is possible to stand up for Jesus, to articulate our faith clearly as witnesses, and to defend our faith effectively, while at the same time not being perceived as judgmental. Christians need to be faithful witnesses to God who are willing to listen to people with drastically different stories. In those exchanges, when we suspend judgment and truly listen, we will find truth and beauty and goodness in some of the most unexpected places. We will also find that, if we truly listen, we may be given a chance to speak.

Features include:

• Help for interfaith and intercultural dialog
• Thought-provoking questions for spiritual conversation or reflection

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781401680190
Publisher:	Nelson, Thomas, Inc.
Publication date:	07/07/2015
Series:	Refraction
Pages:	192
Product dimensions:	5.90(w) x 8.90(h) x 0.60(d)

About the Author

David Capes is the Thomas Nelson Research Professor at Houston Baptist University. He is a noted Pauline scholar, and he served as the senior Bible scholar for The Voice Bible translation. He is the author and editor of several books, includingThe Last Eyewitness: The Final Week, The Voice of Hebrews, Rediscovering Paul, and Thriving in Babylon.

Refraction books speak to the most troubling issues we face today in a candid dialog that interacts with our culture through a biblical lens, utilizing a holistic approach of intellectual engagement, emotional vulnerability, and spiritual challenge for the next generation.

Read an Excerpt

Slow to Judge

Sometimes It's Ok to Listen

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By David B. Capes

Thomas Nelson

Copyright © 2015 David B. Capes
All rights reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-4016-8019-0

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CHAPTER 1

A LISTENING HEART

"Please give Your servant a listening heart for judging Your people and for knowing the difference between what is good and what is evil." —King Solomon (1 Kings 3:9)

"Whenever it shows up, we expect wisdom may have a face." —Mark McMinn

Like many, I've stumbled Into some of the best things of life. Without really meaning to or planning It, I've found friendships and connections that have profoundly Influenced and shaped my life. How did this Georgia boy who grew up Baptist end up with a conservative rabbi and Catholic priest as two of his best and most enduring friends? It wasn't planned; It just happened. Providence, you say? I agree.

I didn't start life with an Interest In Interfalth or Intercultural dialogue. It just sort of happened. I didn't have a deep desire to study other religions formally or Informally, but I did take an occasional course In world religions along the way, the kind offered by most colleges and universities. Still, engaging people of different faiths, backgrounds, and cultures has become a weekly—If not dally—part of my life. On more than one occasion, those experiences have meant that I have had to be slow to judge and quick to listen.

Now, before we go any further, let me relate to you a story from the Bible that ought to set the table nicely. If you've read the Bible, you are probably familiar with this account. If not, then this may be brand new. Still, even If you have read the story, I'll bet there Is a detail or two In It that you have never noticed because—to be honest—most English translations don't make It that easy. Let me tell the story and then get down to some precise language In one of the verses.

Solomon had become king. He had been anointed by God's prophet, Indicating God's choice for who would lead His people. Then he had been acclaimed by the people, demonstrating that he was the people's choice to rule over them. Many years earlier, David's court prophet Nathan had said this day would come. Saul's dynasty had not lasted—In fact, he was a one-king dynasty—but God promised David that his son would sit on the throne of Israel and would build Him a temple (2 Sam. 7:12–16). So when King David breathed his last, he had confidence that his son Solomon would Inherit a united and strong Israel. There were challenges that had to be met for the young king to consolidate power; but once those challenges were behind him, Solomon had a chance to sit back and think seriously about the future. What kind of king would he be? How would he make the tough decisions that kings and other rulers are always called to make? What kind of leaders would he choose to advise him? How would he lead the people In a time of war? How would he deal with his own people when they opposed him? Although Solomon had already received a royal education, he knew he needed more. Solomon needed wisdom.

One night, the Eternal God came to the king in a dream and invited him to make a single request (I Kings 3:5). Wisely, Solomon didn't just blurt out the first thing that popped into his mind. He began by rehearsing all the ways God had been faithful to his father David, and how David had remained faithful to God. For a time, he contemplated God's loyal love, especially when He allowed David's own son to sit on the throne of Israel. But Solomon knew he was young and inexperienced. He knew, too, the immensity of the task ahead. To lead a nation so young and vulnerable to its enemies, to shepherd a flock so large and diverse—how was he to do it? So Solomon made his simple request: "Please give Your servant a listening heart for judging Your people and for knowing the difference between what is good and what is evil. Who is capable of judging Your chosen ones, a great people?" (I Kings 3:9).

So what exactly did Solomon ask for? He asked for "a listening heart," a heart that truly listens, not seems to listen, not pretends to listen while trying to figure out how to reply or how to get one up on an opponent. Solomon had watched his father well. He knew that being king meant making hard decisions and passing judgment, not just on big things but on little things, as well. He knew he needed "a listening heart" to pull it off. He knew he needed "a listening heart" to be a great king.

Other translations have rendered the same phrase a bit differently:

an understanding mind (ESV, NRSV)

a discerning heart (NIV)

an understanding heart (NKJV)

Now, all these are legitimate and helpful renderings of the Hebrew, but I prefer the more literal translation of "a listening heart" because it reflects the profound need we have to speak and be heard. Today there is no lack of speaking—everyone Is speaking, blogging, writing, and clamoring to be heard—but how many are listening? I mean, truly listening? I heard a funny line about blogging once, "Never have so many said so little to so few." The point Is that everybody's talking but few are listening. In order to judge well, understand well, and discern right from wrong, you must start with a listening heart.

The king's wise request pleased God. Most people would have asked for a long, healthy life or great personal fortune or honor In battle. Instead, Solomon asked for the ability to understand his people and be able to administer justice, one of the main things a king had to do In those days. So God granted his request and gave him the ability to hear and to know what Is right. In a word, God gave Solomon "wisdom."

This Is why Solomon's name has become so closely associated with wisdom. According to tradition, the good king authored, collected, and Inspired the composition of many proverbs. We will consider a few of these In this book because, to be wise, one must learn to listen, and the best place to begin listening Is to the wisdom of the ages recorded In Holy Scripture. Tradition credits Solomon with writing two of the most significant wisdom books In the Old Testament: Ecclesiastes and Song of Solomon. But perhaps most significantly for our purposes, many of the proverbs are known broadly as the proverbs of Solomon. Moreover, Israel's wise king Inspired the poets and singers of Israel to compose wisdom psalms, such as Psalms I and 14.

We will define wisdom from the Bible's point of view—but first, let's consider five things that wisdom Is not.

1. Wisdom Is not automatic. No one gets wisdom routinely. You aren't just born with It. There Is no "Wisdom DNA." It Is not the result of some natural process. Wisdom must be cultivated like a garden. Everyone may have the capacity for wisdom, but not everyone develops It. Even Solomon, In all his glory had to cultivate wisdom, seek It out, and make It his own.

2. Wisdom Is not raw Intelligence. Some people are gifted with raw Intelligence. They have unusual academic abilities and can excel In their studies If they put their minds to It. But wisdom Is not equated with raw Intelligence or Innate smartness. Many Intelligent people end up making foolish decisions and living badly.

3. Wisdom also has nothing to do with education. A person may have a PhD In any number of subjects and still be a fool, from the biblical perspective. Education Is the acquisition of skills, competencies, and knowledge, but at a very basic level that has nothing to do with wisdom. Recently, I was talking with a psychology professor who was telling me that doctors—some of the most educated people In society—have one of the highest rates of successful suicides. The acquisition of knowledge often takes place apart from wisdom.

4. Wisdom Is not the result of hard knocks. We should not equate It with "street smarts." Now sometimes, people who endure a life of hardship develop wisdom, but there are no guarantees. There Is no direct cause-and-effect relationship between suffering and wisdom. More often than not, people who experience life's hard stuff turn out to be bitter and angry. No one would describe them as wise.

5. Wisdom is not the result of growing old. Let's consider the well-known American proverb, "There's no fool like an old fool." Age may temper us and in ways make us calmer and better; it may smooth off the rough edges. But none of that is guaranteed. Everyone has met older people who are harsh, opinionated, unkind, and Impatient. The term "old codger" comes to mind. Many old people are not wise at all. In order to be wise, growing old must be combined with something else.

Well, then, what Is wisdom, biblically speaking? Let me give a brief—and what I hope will be helpful—definition, and you will see how It relates to King Solomon and the concerns of this book.

Wisdom is the ability to live life well and make good decisions.

That's It. It's so simple most people stumble over it. But think about It for a moment. Wouldn't It be wonderful If we could live life well? Wouldn't It be magnificent to look back over our lives and say we have lived well and made the right decisions? We married the right person (though It may be wise for many to remain single). We chose the right vocation. We went to the right schools. We spent our time and money wisely. We had good and lasting friendships with the people who made us better. We enjoyed relatively good health because we feasted well, fasted often, and rested enough. Wisdom Is that ability to live well, and It comes, according to Solomon, by developing a listening heart and truly listening to wise people like our parents, our mentors, our friends, our spiritual leaders, our employers, our neighbors in need, and sometimes even people who are very different from us.

Now, notice a key to what Solomon says about wisdom and knowledge, "The worship of the Eternal One, the one True God, is the first step toward knowledge" (Prov. 1:7). Knowledge in the poetry of Proverbs is a synonym for wisdom. The mechanism for developing wisdom and knowledge is this, "a listening heart." But the first step in that direction is to know the one True God and stand in respect and awe of Him. Worship is our appropriate response to knowing who God is and knowing who we are in relation to Him. Trouble comes and fools rush in when we imagine we are more than we are—stronger than we are, smarter than we are, more important than we are—and when we dare to think that we as creatures can somehow get on without our Creator.

Fast-forward to the New Testament letter of James. This little book in the back of the Bible is widely understood to be the most thoroughgoing example of early Christian wisdom. Here are a few key verses from the opening chapter:

If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for he who doubts is like a wave of the sea driven and tossed by the wind. For let not that man suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways. (James 1:5–8 NKJV)

What does James add to the mix? Simply this: wisdom is God's gift to those who ask. Again, wisdom is not a natural by-product of just living; it comes to us as God's gift when we pause long enough to ask sincerely for it. Notice, too, that we have to be wise enough in the first place to know that we lack wisdom. Some unfortunately don't ever get that far. God gives, James says, "liberally and without reproach"—in other words, "He gives lavishly and never scolds you for asking" (James 1:5).

When we ask for wisdom, James teaches, we must ask in faith. Faith in this instance means trust; it is a sense of absolute dependency on God. As a poker-playing friend of mine says, "Faith is the decision to go 'all in' with God." Some translations, I'm afraid, miss the point when they render the Greek original "ask in faith, with no doubting," as if doubt is the opposite of faith.

Let me suggest something that may strike you as a bit radical: doubt is not the opposite of faith. People of great faith often struggle with doubts. Consider how often the biblical psalms question God and dabble in "doubt." Recall how Mother Teresa—one of the greatest saints of the twentieth century—struggled at times with intellectual questions and doubt. Most men and women of great faith I have known have worked through doubts at key moments in their spiritual journeys. In fact, doubts may be important signposts along the journey of a life well lived. The opposite of faith is not doubt; it is willful disbelief. In fact, the word often translated "doubt" here in James 1:5–8 means to make a decision on your own without reference to God. It is the opposite of the counsel found in Proverbs.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths. (Prov. 3:5–6 NKJV)

James, I believe, was inspired by Proverbs 3 when he reflected on wisdom. Ask in faith and do not lean on your own understanding. Leaning on your own understanding is the opposite of faith; it is contrary to trusting in the Lord with all your heart. If we say to God, "God, I've got this one," or "God, I'll take it from here," we aren't doubting God's existence or His good name or His power to help us; what we are doing is taking the wheel and telling God to take the back seat. That's not wisdom, that's foolishness. It's as if we say, "God, You take care of the big stuff—like healing my diseases and getting me to heaven when I die—but I'll take care of the little stuff' (secretly knowing that much of life is made up of the little stuff). James's point is this: when we ask for wisdom from God, we must not fall back into trusting—or preferring—our own finite, flawed knowledge. Once we launch the ship of faith, once we leave the shore, we don't look back or choose to take the helm in our own hand.

The apostle Paul addresses wisdom, but he adds an interesting twist that we must not miss:

Look carefully at your call, brothers and sisters. By human standards, not many of you are deemed to be wise. Not many are considered powerful. Not many of you come from royalty, right? But celebrate this: God selected the world's foolish to bring shame upon those who think they are wise; likewise, He selected the world's weak to bring disgrace upon those who think they are strong. God selected the common and the castoff, whatever lacks status, so He could invalidate the claims of those who think those things are significant. So it makes no sense for any person to boast in God's presence. Instead, credit God with your new situation: you are united with Jesus the Anointed. He is God's wisdom for us and more. He is our righteousness and holiness and redemption. As the Scripture says: "If someone wants to boast, he should boast in the Lord." (I Cor. 1:26–31)

When all is said and done, Paul makes a profound point that we must not fail to notice. Ultimately wisdom is not a what, it is a Who. Jesus, the Messiah, is God's wisdom for us. Though we may not have expected it, wisdom has a face. Jesus embodies the totality of God's wisdom. As Jesus walked the earth, He was a sage who dispensed heaven's wisdom to His disciples and any who would truly listen.

Now, He has sent the Holy Spirit as our Paraclete, the One who is called to our side, the advocate who Is to guide us Into all wisdom and remind us of Jesus' words and ways. Ultimately, our pursuit of wisdom will lead us to a person: Jesus of Nazareth. As He lives In us and as we abide In Him, we move closer to experiencing God's wisdom In our lives.

But before we leave Paul, let's also notice something else he said. There Is a quality which this world calls wisdom that Is not wisdom at all; It Is more akin to foolishness. Oh, on a popular level, It Is honored as wisdom, treated as wisdom, celebrated as wisdom, but In the end the world's bogus wisdom will not lead to good decisions, a good life, or a good society. This worldly wisdom looks down on God's chosen ones and deems them fools. But radically and subversively, God Is on the move undermining everything the worldly wise hold dear and significant. God selects the poor and weak, the marginalized, and the castoffs to demonstrate the ultimate bankruptcy of the world's wisdom. And It all began with the cross:

For people who are stumbling toward ruin, the message of the cross Is nothing but a tall tale for fools by a fool. But for those of us who are already experiencing the reality of being rescued and made right, It Is nothing short of God's power. This Is why the Scripture says:

I will put an end to the wisdom of the so-called wise, and I will Invalidate the Insight of your so-called experts.

(Continues...)

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Excerpted from Slow to Judge by David B. Capes. Copyright © 2015 David B. Capes. Excerpted by permission of Thomas Nelson.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
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Table of Contents

Acknowledgments xi

Introduction xvii

Chapter 1 A Listening Heart 1

Chapter 2 "Do Not Judge"… Really? 15

Chapter 3 A Book by Its Cover 27

Chapter 4 Love and Forgiveness 43

Chapter 5 Homophobia, Islamophobia, Christophobia 65

Chapter 6 The Problem with Tolerance 79

Chapter 7 Authentic Tolerance 95

Chapter 8 Listening to a Muslim Leader: Fethullah Gulen 115

Chapter 9 Listening to the Pagans: C. S. Lewis 129

Conclusion 141

Notes 147

About the Author 153