Read an Excerpt
TEASER
INT.NIGHTCLUB--NIGHT A
Opening credits over the following:
Jerry
Do you know what this is all about? Do you.know why we're here? To be out.This is out.Out is one of the single most enjoyable experiences of life.People--you know how many people come home at night--"We should go out?" This is what they're talking about.This whole thing--we're all out, no one is home.
Not one person here is home.We're all out.There are people trying to find us.They don't know where we are."Did you-I can't find them, where did he go? I don't know.He didn't tell me where he was going.He must have gone out." You want to go out.You get ready, you pick out the clothes, right? You take the shower, get all ready.Get the cash, get your friends, the car, the spot, the reservations, when you stand around, what do you do? You go, "We gotta be getting back." Once you're out, you want to get back.You want to go to sleep, you want to get up, you want to go out again tomorrow, right? Wherever you are in life, it's my feeling, you've gotta go.End opening credits.
ACT I
SCENE A
FADE IN:
EXT.COFFEE SHOP--ESTABLISHING SHOT--DAY (STOCK)
INT.COFFEE SHOP--LATE AFTERNOON (DAY I)
A typical New York City coffee shop.It's not rush hour, but there's activity and we hear that unmistakable din.Jerry and a longtime friend, George, are sitting at a table.George, slightly insecure, has an opinion on everything.He lives life at a higher intensity level than Jerry.
Jerry
See, now to me, that button" is in the worst possible spot.The secondbutton literafly makes or breaks the shirt.Look at it, it's too high, it's in no-man's-land.You look like you live with your mother.
George
Are you through?
Jerry
You do, of course, try on when you buy.
George
Yes, it was purple, I liked it.I don't recall considering the button.
Jerry
Oh, you don't recall.
The Seinfeld Scripts. Copyright © by Jerry Seinfeld. Reprinted by permission of HarperCollins Publishers, Inc. All rights reserved. Available now wherever books are sold.