Salty
From the author of Moist and Delicious comes a raucous comic novel where anything goes. Turk Henry, an overweight, unemployed rock star married to a supermodel, has discovered that Thailand is probably the last place a recovering sex addict should go on vacation, yet here he is, surrounded by topless groupies and haunted by the stares of hundreds of luscious bar girls. Turk's struggles with monogamy, however, pale beside a greater challenge when his wife is abducted by a group of renegade, shipless Thai pirates. As Turk, whose life skills are limited to playing bass and partying, navigates the back alleys of Bangkok and the deadly jungles of Southeast Asia to save his wife, Salty heats up and sweats bullets. Featuring skinflint American tourists, topless beaches, a hypochondriac U.S. government agent, suitcases loaded with cash, an over-eager full-service personal assistant, a horny Australian commando, inventive prostitutes, and an urbane pirate with a fetish for alabaster skin, this is a hilariously entertaining, thoroughly debauched caper novel - with a happy finish. "In Carl Hiaasen-like fashion, Smith exuberantly spins out a busy plot loaded with over-the-top characters while taking a few well-aimed potshots at cultural expectations..Absurd, grotesque, and plain fun reading." -Booklist "Smith gets the details of mid-level rock stardom just right . mixing laughs and satire like a cross between Carl Hiaasen and Ross Thomas. A-" -Entertainment Weekly "Graham Greene meets the Marx Brothers and the result is Salty, Mark Haskell Smith's riveting new novel of unquiet Americans on the loose in Thailand. Profane, endearing, and just absurd enough to be totally convincing, Salty is both a comic thriller and a thoughtful meditation on love, lust, and the American way." -Tom Drury, author of The Driftless Area "For Turk, saving the day is almost as impossible as staying monogamous. Luckily, being funny comes easily to screenwriter Smith, who writes like Carl Hiaasen, cheerfully skewering Homeland Security, heavy metal, compromised Hollywood morals, American arrogance, fetishes and anything else worth taking a shot at, i.e. . everything. Through it all, Turk rocks on. Smith just plain rocks." -Miami Herald "[Mark Haskell Smith's] characters include a not-so-usual suspect lineup of hustlers, sex addicts, supermodels, failed rock stars, wine-buff cops, psychos and flakes. Haskell Smith writes well, especially about sex and food, and the multilayered plots move so fast they feel fresh. Think Elmore Leonard meets Mario Batali." -Richard Rayner, Los Angeles Times "There is one word for this farce about a fat alcoholic rock star whose wife is kidnapped by Thai pirates: vulgar.. On further thought, a couple of other words describe this book - colorful, satirical, and hilarious!" --Library Journal "Smith alternates spoofy, lush travel-writer prose with dead-on dialogue and jibes at the lives of
"1100379361"
Salty
From the author of Moist and Delicious comes a raucous comic novel where anything goes. Turk Henry, an overweight, unemployed rock star married to a supermodel, has discovered that Thailand is probably the last place a recovering sex addict should go on vacation, yet here he is, surrounded by topless groupies and haunted by the stares of hundreds of luscious bar girls. Turk's struggles with monogamy, however, pale beside a greater challenge when his wife is abducted by a group of renegade, shipless Thai pirates. As Turk, whose life skills are limited to playing bass and partying, navigates the back alleys of Bangkok and the deadly jungles of Southeast Asia to save his wife, Salty heats up and sweats bullets. Featuring skinflint American tourists, topless beaches, a hypochondriac U.S. government agent, suitcases loaded with cash, an over-eager full-service personal assistant, a horny Australian commando, inventive prostitutes, and an urbane pirate with a fetish for alabaster skin, this is a hilariously entertaining, thoroughly debauched caper novel - with a happy finish. "In Carl Hiaasen-like fashion, Smith exuberantly spins out a busy plot loaded with over-the-top characters while taking a few well-aimed potshots at cultural expectations..Absurd, grotesque, and plain fun reading." -Booklist "Smith gets the details of mid-level rock stardom just right . mixing laughs and satire like a cross between Carl Hiaasen and Ross Thomas. A-" -Entertainment Weekly "Graham Greene meets the Marx Brothers and the result is Salty, Mark Haskell Smith's riveting new novel of unquiet Americans on the loose in Thailand. Profane, endearing, and just absurd enough to be totally convincing, Salty is both a comic thriller and a thoughtful meditation on love, lust, and the American way." -Tom Drury, author of The Driftless Area "For Turk, saving the day is almost as impossible as staying monogamous. Luckily, being funny comes easily to screenwriter Smith, who writes like Carl Hiaasen, cheerfully skewering Homeland Security, heavy metal, compromised Hollywood morals, American arrogance, fetishes and anything else worth taking a shot at, i.e. . everything. Through it all, Turk rocks on. Smith just plain rocks." -Miami Herald "[Mark Haskell Smith's] characters include a not-so-usual suspect lineup of hustlers, sex addicts, supermodels, failed rock stars, wine-buff cops, psychos and flakes. Haskell Smith writes well, especially about sex and food, and the multilayered plots move so fast they feel fresh. Think Elmore Leonard meets Mario Batali." -Richard Rayner, Los Angeles Times "There is one word for this farce about a fat alcoholic rock star whose wife is kidnapped by Thai pirates: vulgar.. On further thought, a couple of other words describe this book - colorful, satirical, and hilarious!" --Library Journal "Smith alternates spoofy, lush travel-writer prose with dead-on dialogue and jibes at the lives of
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Salty

Salty

by Mark Haskell Smith

Narrated by Peter Berkrot

Unabridged — 8 hours, 23 minutes

Salty

Salty

by Mark Haskell Smith

Narrated by Peter Berkrot

Unabridged — 8 hours, 23 minutes

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Overview

From the author of Moist and Delicious comes a raucous comic novel where anything goes. Turk Henry, an overweight, unemployed rock star married to a supermodel, has discovered that Thailand is probably the last place a recovering sex addict should go on vacation, yet here he is, surrounded by topless groupies and haunted by the stares of hundreds of luscious bar girls. Turk's struggles with monogamy, however, pale beside a greater challenge when his wife is abducted by a group of renegade, shipless Thai pirates. As Turk, whose life skills are limited to playing bass and partying, navigates the back alleys of Bangkok and the deadly jungles of Southeast Asia to save his wife, Salty heats up and sweats bullets. Featuring skinflint American tourists, topless beaches, a hypochondriac U.S. government agent, suitcases loaded with cash, an over-eager full-service personal assistant, a horny Australian commando, inventive prostitutes, and an urbane pirate with a fetish for alabaster skin, this is a hilariously entertaining, thoroughly debauched caper novel - with a happy finish. "In Carl Hiaasen-like fashion, Smith exuberantly spins out a busy plot loaded with over-the-top characters while taking a few well-aimed potshots at cultural expectations..Absurd, grotesque, and plain fun reading." -Booklist "Smith gets the details of mid-level rock stardom just right . mixing laughs and satire like a cross between Carl Hiaasen and Ross Thomas. A-" -Entertainment Weekly "Graham Greene meets the Marx Brothers and the result is Salty, Mark Haskell Smith's riveting new novel of unquiet Americans on the loose in Thailand. Profane, endearing, and just absurd enough to be totally convincing, Salty is both a comic thriller and a thoughtful meditation on love, lust, and the American way." -Tom Drury, author of The Driftless Area "For Turk, saving the day is almost as impossible as staying monogamous. Luckily, being funny comes easily to screenwriter Smith, who writes like Carl Hiaasen, cheerfully skewering Homeland Security, heavy metal, compromised Hollywood morals, American arrogance, fetishes and anything else worth taking a shot at, i.e. . everything. Through it all, Turk rocks on. Smith just plain rocks." -Miami Herald "[Mark Haskell Smith's] characters include a not-so-usual suspect lineup of hustlers, sex addicts, supermodels, failed rock stars, wine-buff cops, psychos and flakes. Haskell Smith writes well, especially about sex and food, and the multilayered plots move so fast they feel fresh. Think Elmore Leonard meets Mario Batali." -Richard Rayner, Los Angeles Times "There is one word for this farce about a fat alcoholic rock star whose wife is kidnapped by Thai pirates: vulgar.. On further thought, a couple of other words describe this book - colorful, satirical, and hilarious!" --Library Journal "Smith alternates spoofy, lush travel-writer prose with dead-on dialogue and jibes at the lives of

Editorial Reviews

Publishers Weekly

Staking out uncomfortable territory between gonzo humor and something far more serious, this thrill-packed romp from novelist (Moist; Delicious) and screenwriter Smith is set primarily in Thailand. While vacationing, unemployed rock star Turk Henry, a recovering sex addict, tries to avoid the temptations of his many fans, a predicament sent up beautifully by Smith. Meanwhile, Turk's wife, Sheila, takes a group tour elephant ride—only to have her party kidnapped by Captain Somporn and his violent band of former narcotics policemen. The novel alternates between explicit sex scenes involving Turk and the fairly severe acts of violence against Sheila and her fellow tourists. As the situation turns deadly, Turk has to rouse himself to save his wife, a challenge that Smith manages to make more meaningful than just one man's waking from a cosseted cocoon. Humor and suspense rub up against each other uneasily throughout, but Smith's writing is sharp, and Turk makes a blundering, contradictory and very compelling lead. (June)

Copyright 2007 Reed Business Information

Kirkus Reviews

Thai pirates kidnap a chubby ex-rock star's supermodel squeeze. Turk Henry, Gene Simmons's psychic twin and former bassist for the chart-topping Metal Assassin, is vacationing in Phuket, Thailand, home to spicy noodles and spicier hookers. But the recovering sex addict is bored. Massively endowed and miniaturely-brained, Turk is a dolt for whom "ice cold beer" are the "three greatest words in the English language." He's in Thailand at the behest of Sheila, ex-Vogue girl crowding 30 and, partied out, now settling for security in a tolerably cheerless covergirl/rockgod marriage. They're dysfunctional yin/yang: He's comfortably numb; she digs Deepak and adventure. The latter arrives in the form of Captain Somporn, yeoman of a crew of Johnny Depp-style buccaneers and a hunk himself, a "beach bum Chow Yun Fat." He abducts Sheila for big-bucks ransom; she develops a Stockholm-Syndrome crush on the matey, who's no thug but a salacious aesthete, content to watch her bathe her alabaster tush. Yanked from torpor by a Galahadian impulse, Turk aims at rescue, contacting an American government flunkie who absurdly tells him that Uncle Sam won't negotiate with terrorists-and then makes off with the ransom. Also "aiding" Turk are his hilariously venal manager, various publicists who want the scoop for People and Turk's punky-chic, good-girl personal assistant, who eventually masters her lust for her boss via same-sex bliss with a hooker. Smith (Delicious, 2003, etc.) alternates spoofy, lush travel-writer prose with dead-on dialogue and jibes at the lives of the undeservedly privileged. A romp to relish. Agent: Mary Evans/Mary Evans Inc.

From the Publisher

“Graham Greene meets the Marx Brothers and the result is Salty, Mark Haskell Smith's riveting new novel of unquiet Americans on the loose in Thailand. Profane, endearing, and just absurd enough to be totally convincing, Salty is both a comic thriller and a thoughtful meditation on love, lust, and the American way.” —Tom Drury, author of The Driftless Area

“For Turk, saving the day is almost as impossible as staying monogamous. Luckily, being funny comes easily to screenwriter Smith, who writes like Carl Hiaasen, cheerfully skewering Homeland Security, heavy metal, compromised Hollywood morals, American arrogance, fetishes and anything else worth taking a shot at, i.e. … everything. Through it all, Turk rocks on. Smith just plain rocks.” —Miami Herald

“[Mark Haskell Smith’s] characters include a not-so-usual suspect lineup of hustlers, sex addicts, supermodels, failed rock stars, wine-buff cops, psychos and flakes. Haskell Smith writes well, especially about sex and food, and the multilayered plots move so fast they feel fresh. Think Elmore Leonard meets Mario Batali.” —Richard Rayner, Los Angeles Times

“There is one word for this farce about a fat alcoholic rock star whose wife is kidnapped by Thai pirates: vulgar…. On further thought, a couple of other words describe this book – colorful, satirical, and hilarious!” ––Library Journal

“Smith alternates spoofy, lush travel-writer prose with dead-on dialogue and jibes at the lives of the undeservedly privileged. A romp to relish.” ––Kirkus Reviews

“An exquisitely written thriller that is as entertaining as it is intelligent while also being confidently garnished by Smith with copious amounts of humor: a perfect prose concoction that is fit for any literary palate.” —Entertainment World

“No doubt about it, Smith knows how to spin a good yarn.” —Reviewingtheevidence.com

Salty is a loud, drunk, sexy party which, like its main character, reveals a golden heart.” —The Calgary Herald

Salty is a delicious blend of humor, intrigue and sexiness. … It’s rare to find such an intelligent thriller that balances action with humor.” —PopSyndicate

“Shady dealings, wry political commentary and a steady dose of humor make the romp a heady treat. Now giddily into its second printing, Salty is a bromide with a beat.”—Pasadena Weekly

Product Details

BN ID: 2940171286293
Publisher: Recorded Books, LLC
Publication date: 12/25/2015
Edition description: Unabridged
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