Read an Excerpt
ACT ONE
SCENE 1
A cross-dressed HAIRY GODMOTHER enters, holding a book.
HAIRY GODMOTHER
(opening book)
Once upon a time. . .
(beat)
What? What’s the matter? You’ve never seen a hairy godmother before?
(beat)
Maybe you were expecting someone -- a little different? Someone with a little less testosterone? Some sweet old grandma type with a blue cloak and a magic wand? A FAIRY godmother?
(beat)
Well, news flash: that was a TYPO!
(beat)
You can’t believe everything you read in fairy tales. Jack and the magic beanstalk? We’re talking genetically modified plants, here. And the three little pigs? They went on to become [Insert name of local development company].
(beat)
I hear what you’re saying: the whole point of a fairy tale is that everyone knows the story. Sure as the moon’s in the sky every night, Cinderella’s always gonna lose her glass slipper and Rapunzel’s always gonna have a grooming problem, and me, well, I’m gonna wave the wand around and sing “Bibbidi-Bobbidi-Boo.”
(beat)
But what if the moon WASN’T in the sky? Because THAT’S a story I bet you’ve never heard. . .
He walks off, revealing:
SCENE 2
LUNA, the moon, and her friends, STELLA and BELLA, are up in the sky, listening to the radio.
JOHNNY NOVA
Howdy folks, welcome back to the number one satellite radio show in the galaxy. I’m Johnny Nova, comin’at you so bright you better keep your shades on!
STELLA
Guys, guys! It’s on again!!!
JOHNNY NOVA
Now, let’s get back to some of those hit Nep-Tunes. . .
STELLA
Hey, Bella, does this dress make my asteroid look fat?
BELLA
Honestly, Stella, you KNOW you’re a heavenly body.
LUNA
People down there just don’t get it!
STELLA
Don’t tell me you’re spying again.
BELLA
Oh, stop being such a blue moon! Humans mess everything up.
LUNA
Seeing them throw away love makes me want to just stop glowing! Seriously, girls, why else are we here?
Bella and Stella look at each other and shrug.
BELLA
The universal health care plan?
LUNA
No! All those wishes on a falling star. All those kisses in the moonlight. But each night I see humans throwing away true love.
SONG 1: OVER THE MOON
LUNA:
When it comes to love, you shoot for the stars.
When it comes to love, no journey’s too far.
Love is worth waiting for.
Love conquers all
right from the moment you fall.
LUNA WITH STELLA AND BELLA:
Someday I will find the guy of my dreams.
Someday I will find a fella who seems
like he was meant for me,
a perfect pair,
and then a lifetime we’ll share!
CHORUS:
Every word he whispers
is a secret tune.
Every one of his kisses, I know,
will send me over the moon!
Maybe one day I will walk down a street,
and, by chance, our eyes will happen to meet.
And we will know right then
we’re meant to be,
forever after happily!
And we will know right then
we’re meant to be,
forever after happily!
JOHNNY NOVA
This one’s going out to all you lovers. . .
LUNA
That’s it! Girls, I’m leaving. If people on Earth can’t find true love, I’m going to find it for them!
© 2011 Jodi Picoult and Jake van Leer