Opening the Can of Worms, Complications in Couples and Couple Therapy

by Ronald Mah

Overview

The therapist must anticipate complications- anticipate uncovering a "can of worms," that confuse and overwhelm the partners and therapy. Issues arise or intrude that ignite intense emotional reactivity from beneath the psychic surface to make easy living difficult if not impossible. Often minor issues become major issues over time and/or with other contributing factors. The therapist is tasked to uncover how issues interact in complex, nuanced, and fluid ways to influence emotions, thinking, psychology, spirituality, and behavior. Therapy must adjust to discovering that the direction of lower emotional reactivity to reduce problematic behavior although appropriate is complex to activate. Therapy can direct clients how their emotional reactivity including as expressed in bipolar disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder, developmental trauma disorder, sexual trauma, self-medication, and personality disorders function as third partners in the couple that cause seemingly illogical behavioral changes. PTSD not just in warzones but also in family experiences, developmental trauma disorder, and the Predator-Prey-Witness triangle (aka Combat PTSD Trinity) are examined in particular for how they complicate later relationships. Gottman's Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse along with other theories of psychodynamic, attachment, family systems, and family-of-origin help direct important psychoeducation, therapy, and the partners' change. The therapist is guided how to anticipate and use inevitable therapeutic failures as well as issues of chronicity, grief, loss, and self-medication due to high emotional reactivity to hone and adjust the conceptualization, strategy, and direction of therapy.

Product Details

BN ID:	2940045300339
Publisher:	Ronald Mah
Publication date:	09/23/2013
Series:	Challenges in Couples and Couple Therapy , #1
Sold by:	Smashwords
Format:	eBook
File size:	745 KB
Age Range:	18 Years

About the Author

Therapist, educator, author and consultant combine concepts, principles, and philosophy with practical techniques and guidelines for effective and productive results. A Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist (licensed 1994), his experiences include:

Psychotherapist: individual, child and teen, couples, and family therapy in private practice in San Leandro, California- specialties include challenging couples, difficult teenagers, Aspergers Syndrome, Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder, learning disabilities, cross and multi-cultural issues, foster children, child development, parenting, and personality disorders;

Author: twenty-one project/books on couples therapy for a doctoral program, including substantial work on major complications in couples and couples therapy (including depression, anxiety, domestic violence, personality disorders, addiction, and affairs); articles for the Journal of the California Association of Marriage & Family Therapist (CAMFT) on working with teenagers, elder care issues affecting family dynamics, and assessing dangerous clients, online courses for the National Association of Social Workers- California chapter (NASW-CA) on child abuse prevention, legal and ethical vulnerabilities for professionals, and difficult children, “Difficult Behavior in Early Childhood, Positive Discipline for PreK-3 Classrooms and Beyond” (Corwin Press, 2006), “The One-Minute Temper Tantrum Solution” (Corwin Press, 2008), and “Getting Beyond Bullying and Exclusion, PreK-5, Empowering Children in Inclusive Classrooms,” (Corwin Press, 2009); Asian Pacific Islander Parent Education Support (APIPES) curriculum for the City of San Francisco Department of Human Services (1996), 4th-6th Grade Social Science Reader, Asian-American History, Berkeley Unified School District, Berkeley, CA, (1977), and trainer/speaker of 20 dvds on child development and behavior for Fixed Earth Films, and in another time and career three arts and crafts books for children: two with Symbiosis Press (1985 &1987) and one with Price, Sloan, and Stern (1986);

Consultant and trainer: for social services programs working with youth and young adults, Asian-American community mental health, Severe Emotional Disturbance (SED) school programs, therapeutic, social support, and vocational programs for at risk youth, welfare to work programs, Head Start organizations, early childhood education programs and conferences, public, private, and parochial schools and organizations,

Clinical supervisor: for therapists in Severe Emotional Disturbance (SED) school programs, child and family therapists in a community counseling agency, Veteran Affairs in-patient clinician working with PTSD and dual diagnoses, foster care services manager for a school district, manager/supervisor for the Trevor Project-San Francisco, and therapists in a high school mental health clinic;

Educator: credentialed elementary and secondary teacher, Masters of Psychology instructor for Licensed Marriage & Family Therapy (LMFT) and Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor (LPCC) track students, 16 years in early childhood education, including owning and running a child development center for 11 years, elementary & secondary teaching credentials, community college instructor, and trainer/speaker for staff development and conferences for social services organizations including early childhood development, education, social work, and psychotherapy.

Other professional roles: member Ethics Committee for six years and at-large member Board of Directors for four years for the California Association of Marriage & Family Therapist (CAMFT), and member Board of Directors of the California Kindergarten Association (CKA) for two three-year terms.

Personal: married since 1981 after dating since 1972 to girlfriend/wife/life partner with two wonderful strong adult daughters, and fourth of five American-born children from immigrant parents- the older of the "second set" of children.