Notes on Love: Being Single and Dating in a Marriage Obsessed Church

by Lauren Windle

Overview

In this delightfully witty and uplifting book, thirty-something Lauren Windle shines a light on the trials and tribulations - and sometimes also the triumphs - of the world of Christian dating.

This is not a how-to guide.

Like having a coffee with your mates while you pore over your profile matches, heartbreaks and hilarious mishaps, Notes on Love draws on Lauren's own experiences of being single and dating in the Church to offer a funny, insightful and open-hearted collection of musings on the absurdity, messiness, pain and joy of it all.

With notes on 'How to first date' and 'A million ways to meet people' to 'Disappointment' and 'Schrodinger's boyfriend', as well as looking at how you can find true love with yourself, your friends and family and above all in Christ, Notes on Love is a thought-provoking exploration of Christian relationships in the Church today.

This is a book for anyone who has struggled with dating in Church, or who has asked themselves how to be single as a Christian only to discover there's no right answer. Warm, generous and honest, Notes on Love is an invitation to laugh, cry and know that whether you are male or female, single, coupled up or somewhere in between, you are not alone.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9780281085569
Publisher:	SPCK Publishing
Publication date:	07/15/2021
Sold by:	Barnes & Noble
Format:	eBook
Pages:	200
File size:	274 KB

About the Author

Lauren Windle is a public speaker and journalist, published by Mail Online, Huffington Post, The Sun Online, Fabulous Digital, Marie Claire, The Star, Church Times and others. On 22nd April 2014 she got clean and sober from a cocaine and alcohol addiction and became a Christian five days later. She has a Masters in Addiction Studies, runs a charity recovery course for people struggling with addition and in 2018 gave a TEDx Talk about her personal story of addiction and recovery. She is also the proud owner of a Blue Peter badge and has her grade four ice-skating. You can connect with Lauren @_lauren_celeste on Instagram and Twitter. Notes on Love is her first book.

Table of Contents

Not another Christian dating book 1
Part 1
SINGLE FILE
Things we shouldn't say to single people 11
Singled out in the Church 13
The Church: a roast 19
Running out of time 25
Being single: pros and cons 31
Are you ready to date? 35
The 'perfect' relationship 47
Idolatry of romance: love addiction 51
Part 2
UP TO DATE
I kissed dating hello 61
Dating through the ages: a to-do list 65
Caught out there: Christian v. secular dating 71
Lonely hearts would like to meet 77
Who to date? 79
A million ways to meet people 85
Should you dating app? 93
How to dating app 97
Date adviser 103
Asking and being asked out: a user's guide 107
Schrodinger's boyfriend 111
How not to first date 119
How to first date 121
Disappointment 125
Calling it a day 135
The exception that proves the rule 143
Part 3
TRUE LOVE
In relationship with yourself 147
In relationship with your friends 151
In relationship with your family 155
Community in the Church: solutions not problems 161
In relationship with Christ 163
And finally... 165
Acknowledgements 171
Bibliography 175

Editorial Reviews

‘This is a book on singleness today, written with honesty and skill, that is, by turns, wonderfully insightful, uncomfortably challenging and hilariously amusing. If you are single or in any way involved with single people, this is a deeply helpful and inspiring resource. Well done, Lauren!’

J John

‘The wider conversation about how church leaders and church communities view marital status is overdue. Marriage has long been held up as the gold standard, with anything else falling short. Lauren Windle offers a window into the world of singleness in church culture, and this book is a helpful tool for leaders and the wider church community to begin to see someone's marital status through their own eyes and lens, which may or may not put marriage on a pedestal.’

Genelle Aldred

‘Lauren cuts through all the standard Christian fluff and stock phrases with her honesty, wisdom and sharp humour. She blends experience, studies and scripture to reframe the way the Church needs to approach singleness. This book is practical and insightful. It’s warm and witty but packs a punch.’

Jon Brown

‘I wish I’d had this book years ago. I couldn’t put it down. Largely because it’s hilarious and brilliantly written, but also because of how boldly it addresses the complex and often stigmatic topic of navigating dating and relationships in the Church – particularly as a woman. Regardless of your gender or relationship status, you need to read this book and take serious note of Lauren’s insights and sage advice. She is a pioneer and I can’t recommend Notes On Love enough!’

Persia Lawson

‘Honest, pithy and relatable. Lauren has written a much needed anthem for a generation of lost single people in the Church.’

Tola Doll Fisher

‘Lauren’s Notes on Love provides a fresh perspective on the challenges that single Christians face. Whether you are dating, looking to date or wanting to stay single, Lauren combines great straightforward advice and amusing, uplifting anecdotes based on her own experiences, together with research gathered from published sources, such as the “Single Living” survey, conducted by Single Friendly Church. Many churches in the UK don’t focus on their single members and if anyone is struggling with being a single Christian, then this book explains how you can learn to understand and value your worth as a single person, whether or not you are looking to be in a relationship. Through weaving in and analysing relevant biblical references, Lauren helps to provide a framework for single people of all ages and stages.’

Amelia Gosal

‘Lauren writes with disarming humour, courage and passion, and I believe Notes on Love will connect with a whole generation of single Christian people. A heartfelt wake-up call to the real challenges facing single Christian people today. Notes on Love is both a reality check and a road map to something better.’

Revd Will Van Der Hart

Notes on Love is a humorous and heart-felt look at being single and dating in the Church for a generation of Christians wrestling with what it means to love and be loved today.

From the Publisher