Memories in Dragonflies: Simple Lessons for Mindful Dying

by Lannette Cornell Bloom

Overview

Life—and death—may be hard; but joy is simple.
Lannette Cornell Bloom, a typical, overworked nurse, wife, and mom of two, was forty-three when her mother was diagnosed with pulmonary fibrosis. She quit her job and dove headlong into the familiar role of caretaking. This choice—to slow down and be present for the hardest year of her life—resulted in an awakening. In unexpected moments, as childhood memories flooded into the present, Lannette glimpsed bits of magic that existed just beyond the pain. Without knowing it, she was experiencing a mindful dying process with her mother—and it was a journey that would change the way she lived the rest of her life.
A touching and soulful memoir that gracefully uncovers the beauty that is often lost within the dying process, Memories in Dragonflies is a beautiful portrait of what it means to be human and a gentle reminder to enjoy every moment, because even the simplest ones bring lasting joy.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781631524691
Publisher:	She Writes Press
Publication date:	08/21/2018
Pages:	122
Product dimensions:	5.50(w) x 8.60(h) x 0.50(d)

About the Author

Lannette Cornell Bloom is a registered nurse, speaker, and author. She is passionate about bringing simple joys to others. As an RN and health practitioner of more than thirty years, she has seen firsthand the need to care for others, both emotionally and physically. She brings into focus the fragility of life and the importance of enjoying the simple joys that slip through our fingers if we’re not paying attention. Bloom currently lives in La Jolla, CA with her husband and two pugs. Learn more at SimpleJoys.com.

Table of Contents

1) The Diagnosis 11

2) Build Your Bridge 17

3) Take a Deep Breath 21

4) Ignore the Clock 25

5) Accept Authenticity 29

6) Let Them Lead 33

7) Be a Sanctuary 37

8) Remember to Look Up 41

9) Find Your Ritual 45

10) Maybe You Can't Walk but You Can Roll 49

11) Accept the Torch 53

12) Slow Down with Fast Food 57

13) Let Your Heart Speak to Other Hearts 61

14) Handle the Things You Can 65

15) Know Your Limits 69

16) Bring the Outdoors In 73

17) Let Go of Anger 79

18) Don't Miss the Small Stuff 83

19) Be Grateful for Each Day 85

20) Create a Family Symbol 87

21) Listen to the Bells Ring 93

22) Always Celebrate 95

23) Listen Without Distraction 101

24) Keep the Precious Moments Intimate 103

25) It's Okay to Let Go 107

26) Memories in Dragonflies 111

Editorial Reviews

2020 Eric Hoffer Award 1st Runner Up in Self-Help 2020 Eric Hoffer First Horizon Award Finalist 2019 Living Now Book Awards Gold Medal Winner in Caregiving 2019 Living Now Book Awards Silver Medal Winner in Grieving (Death/Dying) 2019 International Book Awards, Finalist, Spirituality: Inspirational “A lovely memory of life.” ―Nancy Fuller, Food Network Star and author of Farmhouse Rules “A relatable, tenderly observed account of the 'sacred joy' of tending to the dying.” ―Kirkus Reviews “Bloom has created an emotionally powerful story. The memories Bloom shares allow us to learn about the person her mother was and the person Bloom is; and we connect with both on a very human level. It should be required reading for nursing students.” ―Catherine M. Todero, PHD, RN, FAAN, Dean of Creighton University’s College of Nursing “In Memories in Dragonflies, Bloom takes us on a very personal and poignant journey. It is the author’s story of her mother and her experience helping her to die with dignity. Along the way her mother’s strength guides them both as they learn to comfort, love, and support each other every step along the way.” ―Iris Waichler, MSW, LCSW, author of Role Reversal: How to Take Care of Yourself and Your Aging Parents

From the Publisher

2018-06-06
A portrait of the author's late mother that focuses mainly on her decline in her final days.Debut author Bloom's mom suffered from a persistent cough, which was diagnosed as being caused by pulmonary fibrosis—a disorder in which the lungs fill with scar tissue. Four years later, at the age of 67, she was struggling with her memory and motor functions, so Bloom, a registered nurse, quit her job to be involved in her daily care. As her mother's condition worsens, the narrative slows to address one month per chapter, then decelerates further, dividing months among several chapters. This structure gracefully mirrors how a waning life slows down, forcing one to focus on small details. Bloom notes how gifts, such as a pedicure or eyeglass frames that hid a cannula, meant a lot to her mother and how using a cherry-red wheelchair and decorating a den like a Native American sweat lodge softened the sadness of immobility. The book also elegantly explores the past, showing how one memory transports the author into a related, older one. For instance, when Bloom's mother is confined to a hospital bed, it takes the author back to her own six weeks of bed rest during high school—which were only made tolerable by her mother's love. Bloom recognizes that her mother always "tried to teach me to pause" by arranging a beach trip to see a grunion run, for example, or finding time for a cup of tea with friends. The book's key message is that one should slow down and appreciate each remaining day. There's an effective recurring metaphor of a bridge as a crossing into death, and she tells of using dragonflies as a reminder to let go of anger. It's unfortunate, though, that there are so many clichés in such a short volume: "running on empty," pots boiling over, "the elephant in the room," and so on. That said, most chapters do offer pithy, useful pieces of advice.A relatable, tenderly observed account of the "sacred joy" of tending to the dying.

Kirkus Reviews