Table of Contents
I
Results Of The Polygraph: The Autobiography Of What If & When 1
Pretrial Conference in Chambers: Fogarty the D.A. & A. Tremble Richter the Inadmissable Private Eye 3
In Chambers: Local Law Enforcement Professionals 4
Voir Dire: Weed Out For Knowitalls 5
Voir Dire: The Aggrieved Address the Jury Pool 6
The Lineup @ 33 1/3 S. Latitude 7
Cubist Police Sketch: The One Who Held the Door 8
"In His Hands an Invisible Object": Stenographer's Error Anonymous Testimony 9
II
Deposition: Ms. Chapman's Phantom Cylinder & Willie Cornish on the Boat for Cuba 15
Oath Sworn or Gift in Bad Faith: The Deposition of Mélisande 16
Since I Fell for you": A Deposition 18
Deposition of the Corn-Toed E. R. Intern Confirms the Dangers of Affectation 20
Ivory Deposed In Braille: How Two Wrongs Equal Three Lefts 21
III
Character Witness: As Told to Indigo Wink & Silken Mask 27
Eye Witness to the Motive: The New Evidentiary Method as Reported in Science News "Chromatic Empiricism" 28
New Precedent from the Fifth Circuit: "It's as if Every Place were aware of all Other Places" 29
Autopsy Report: Objet Inquiétant I 31
Character Witness: The Prosecution's Coup: "It's not true that he couldn't": He Blind Herder of Moths & Executioner of Flies 33
Inadmissible Evidence: Coerced Testimory or "Pièces Froides" for Frau Frieda & The Veuve Noir De La Santé 35
IV
Contempt Of Court & Runaway Confession: "& Now that you are Mere Eye…" 41
V
Cross-Exmination: After the Read Back the D.A. Gets all Grinch-Cop / Bad-Cop 53
Affidavit from the Steinway Building: Betrothed & Bereaved & No Need for Applause 54
Confession of the Paid Expert: Five Reasons to try Children as Adults & Adults as if they're Already Dead 56
Attorney Client Privilege: Dress Rehearsal for Out-of-Key Testimony 58
Plea Bargain or Love Chant 59
Amicus Brief: Friends Who Know Don't Ask Anyone Who Asks Doesn't Really Want to Know Anyone Who Knows 60
VI
Jury Instructions: Judge Fogarty 67
Volume Twenty-One: A Murder Victim's Suicide Note or Attorney Client Privilege 68
Prosecution's Closing Argument: Warning: Objects In Mirror are Closer than they Appear in Retrospect 69
Scire Facias: Dr. Tchicai, Alias, Er from Beneath Beyond 71
Volume 22: Potshots at a Son-In-Law 72
Closing Address to the Jury the Defense Rests: "Four Pieces in the Form of a Pear" 75
Jury Deliberations For The Latecomer: Selected Queries & Aphorisms of Isidoro Capdepón Fernandez 77