Last Minute Speeches and Toasts

by Andrew Frothingham

Overview

In Last Minute Speeches and Toasts, Andrew Frothingham gives you useful tips and ideas on how to make a winning last minute speech or toast. You'll find helpful advice and reassurance including:

• Tips on how to choose and use quotes and jokes within the speech or toast.
• Six last minute resources to use.
• Little-known tricks of toasting.
• Killer openers to launch your speech or toast in the right direction.
• Seven facts that can spice up almost any speech (really).
• Easy-to-use event-specific material.

Whether it's an awards banquet toast or a keynote speech, whether it's serious or funny, or anywhere in between, Last Minute Speeches or Toasts is your lifeline, your key to a perfect presentation.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781601634603
Publisher:	Red Wheel/Weiser
Publication date:	10/27/2000
Sold by:	Barnes & Noble
Format:	eBook
Pages:	160
File size:	706 KB

Read an Excerpt

CHAPTER 1

Part I: About Speaking

How to Use This Book

If you have time, read the relevant section of Part I to get some tips on speaking.

If, however, you are in a super-rush, go straight to Part II and skim the category that best describes the occasion at which you will be speaking. In most cases, the right category will be obvious. If you are speaking at a reunion, go to Reunions (page 126). If you are speaking at the dedication of a library, go to Library (page 101).

In some cases, you may have to be a little creative. If you are speaking at a party in celebration of a divorce (a rare kind of party, so we haven't made it a category), you could go to Weddings (page 154) and find a quote to disagree with. You could also find a joke in Dispute (page 70) to use.

You should try to find three gems you like and use them at the beginning, middle, and end of your speech. If you can find only one gem you like for the occasion, use it at the beginning, and end your speech with the biggest, most sincere "thank you" you can muster.

How to Choose and Use Quotes

Using a quote can add authority to almost any point that you are making. However, a quote only helps if it is both relevant to what you're saying and appropriate to your audience.

That does not mean the quote has to be perfectly on point. You can often use a quote on the right topic, but which expresses the wrong point of view. We once wrote a speech for the head of a sales force that began:

"I've been thinking about Alfred Lord Tennyson's famous lines about the Charge of the Light Brigade:

'Theirs not to make reply,

Theirs not to reason why,

Theirs but to do and die.'

I realized that this is the dumbest set of orders I've ever heard.

It's no wonder the Light Brigade got slaughtered. My charge to you is the exact opposite. I want you to reason why — and I want you to live and thrive, not die."

Some pointers when using quotes

» Use quotes to reinforce your message, not to show off your knowledge.

» Quote people whose names the audience is likely to recognize. The quotes in this book come, for the most part, from well-known people. There are many wonderful quotes from obscure people, but the odds are you don't have time to learn who they are or to explain who they are to your audience.

» Name the author only if you know how to pronounce his or her name. You can always introduce the quote with a phrase like "An author once wrote ..." or "It's been said that...."

» Use the shorter version of a name when possible. It's fine to say Mark Twain without adding that his real name was Samuel Longhorne Clemens. Use one name if that's how an author is best known. Say "Milton," rather than John Milton, and "Shakespeare," rather than "William Shakespeare."

» Mention the date of the quote only when it makes the quote more meaningful. For people who think that temperance is a new fad, it's interesting that the phrase "Moderation in all things" was said by Terrence in the 2nd century BC. On the other hand, the fact that Charles M. Schultz came up with the book title Happiness Is a Warm Puppy in 1962 doesn't add much. For this reason, we've included dates after only a few names.

» Quote accurately. Even if you abbreviate your own notes, it is still a good idea to write out any quotes in full.

The 3-Step Fail-Safe Structure for a Speech

Ask salespeople to name the "3 Ts" and they will recite:

> Tell 'em what you're going to tell 'em;

> Tell 'em;

> Tell 'em what you told 'em.

This structure works as well in speeches as it does in sales pitches.

In speeches, repetition is not only okay, it's good. A speech is very different from a book. Because a listener can't go back and review, it's important that you repeat your main points.

In the first part of your speech, tell the audience your major points in outline form. ("Tell 'em what you're going to tell 'em.")

In the middle part of your speech, repeat your points, filling them out. ("Tell 'em.") At the end of your speech, say the points again. Announce that you are repeating, or recapping, or summarizing, so the audience doesn't think you are making a mistake ("Tell 'em what you told 'em."), but don't skip this step.

In emergencies, such as when the speaker before you uses up too much time and you get cut short, you can go straight to your wrap-up, the "tell 'em what you told 'em" part, and still get your points across.

The 3-T structure works like a charm. It makes it easy for your audience to follow, and believe, what you say.

Stick to 4 Points

One of the biggest mistakes speakers make is trying to say too much. That's understandable: A speech is a golden opportunity, so you want to say all you can. The problem is, the more points you make, the less likely the audience is to remember what you say. It's much better to limit yourself to four points and hammer them home. Ideally, the first two or three points should add up to make your last point seem almost inevitable.

The rule of sticking to four points applies to the question-and-an-swer session, if there is one, too. Answer only the questions that have to do with your four points. If a questioner wants you to talk about anything else, offer to discuss his or her question one-on-one after the group session.

5 Killer Opening Strategies

The first few minutes of a speech are the most important. That's when you need to grab the audience's attention. Here are five strategies that work well:

1. Compliment the audience.

People like to hear about themselves. One speaker I know starts her speeches by saying, "Wow, you are great." You may want to find a more clever way of saying this.

One great opening line for an emcee (MC), used by British speakers and later borrowed by an American president, is, "Being the MC here is like being the corpse at a wake. You can't start without me, but I'm not expected to do very much." I had a client who felt that this opener was too morbid, so we came up with "Being the MC here is like throwing out the first pitch on the opening day of the baseball season. I appreciate the honor, but I know that the real stars are the ones who will stand up when I sit down."

The next year, the same client wanted to say the same thing, only differently, so we suggested the line, "I feel like a referee at a pro basketball game. I am surrounded by giants."

2. Offer valuable information or opportunities.

People watch half-hour-long infomercials because they think they are going to get valuable information. The same motivation will get them to listen to you. We heard an executive start a speech saying, "I'm going to tell you what you have to do to get promoted and what you have to do to win bonuses." Everyone in the room paid attention.

Even if you can't promise to make people rich, you can often promise a chance for them to be known and remembered as someone who made a big difference in many lives. Or you may be able to promise people a chance for a once-in-a-lifetime experience.

3. Put the audience in a state of suspense.

If you start a speech by saying you'd like to give two cheers to a person, company, community, and so forth, your audience will pay attention so they can find out why you aren't satisfied enough to give three cheers. This is a great way to set up a speech in which you offer a few compliments, but challenge people to do better.

4. Scare the audience.

Preachers have long known that describing the terrors of hell can be more compelling than describing the pleasures of heaven. You may not want to preach fire and brimstone, but you can often catch an audience by describing what could befall the country, the community, the company, or an individual if the people in the audience don't heed your words.

Freshman orientation at many colleges starts with this kind of sobering thought: "Look at the two people to your left, and the two people to your right. The odds are one of them will not be here in four years."

5. Break the protocol.

Speeches are like ballet or opera. Audiences have strong expectations for how you will act. If you break the protocol, you grab attention. People sense that something unusual is happening.

One speaker we know likes to use a wireless microphone so he can start his speeches from the back of the room or even from the middle of the audience. Another likes to kick over the lectern and prowl around the front of the stage. A calmer speaker we know simply enters the audience to pay a friend a dollar he owes him.

6 Last Minute Resources

Even when you have totally blown it, have no time to do research, and your Internet connection is down, here are a few resources you can turn to (above and beyond this book, which will, almost always, do the trick).

Of course, if your Internet connection isn't down, you should have no problem finding great facts and quotes to add to your talk.

In addition, if you are comfortable quoting from the Bible, and if it is appropriate to quote the Bible to your audience, bibles are easy to find (thanks to the Gideon Society). Open to almost any page and you'll find an interesting passage.

1. The meeting invitation or program

Scour the invitation and program. You are bound to find something in them. Can you comment on whether the title of the meeting would have made sense 20 years ago? Are you honored to be following a particular speaker or on the same program with a particular expert? Can you comment about the city where the meeting is being held? We once heard a speaker start a speech in a hotel with the word sand in its name. He described how sand could be viewed as useless, but how people with vision can see that it contains silica, which could make glass or even silicon chips.

2. The dictionary

This is the oldest speaking trick there is, but it still works. If your topic is "Responsibility," and you find in your dictionary (The Random House Dictionary of the English Language, Second Edition, Unabridged, [New York: Random House, 1987] in this case) that the third definition is "a particular burden of obligation upon one who is responsible," you have a place to start. Read that definition and then go on to say that you think of responsibility as a pleasure rather than a burden.

Most hotels have a dictionary in the business office. Ask to borrow it.

3. The weather page or the weather channel

Get up and say, "Today, the high temperature for the nation is [x] in [city] and the low is [y] in [city], which makes me pretty happy to be here. It also makes me think that if people can tolerate that range of temperatures, they ought to be able to. ..."

4. Fortune cookies

Find the nearest Chinese restaurant and buy one or two dozen fortune cookies. Open them all and read the fortunes. Choose one or two to open with. If you get one that says, "You will soon meet interesting people" or "Good things will happen soon," go on to say that it's true, because you have just met this great audience.

5. The sports page

The sports page is always full of surprise victories, valiant efforts, and comebacks. Often you can get as much material from the losers as the winners. We once heard a speaker begin a speech to a dejected sales force saying, "This morning, the Chicago Cubs are in last place. In the cellar by five games. But do you think anyone on the Cubs has stopped trying? Do you think anyone on the team does not have a dream of how they could claw their way back up to the top? Of course not. They are pros. And so are you."

6. Your family

Your very last resort is to quote your family. Quoting something your late grandmother once said is a safe strategy. Few people are likely to argue with your citation.

A friend of ours captured a crowd by saying, "I'm not sure what I should say to you, but I know what my Uncle J. L. would say. He'd lean back, fix his cold blue eyes on you, and ask, 'Are you fixin' to get hit by the same truck twice?' He wouldn't blame you if someone took advantage of you. But if you let it happen a second time, he had no pity. We've been hurt. Here's what we need to do to make sure it doesn't happen again."

7 Facts That Can Spice Up Almost Any Speech

1. Communicate quickly.

Andrew Jackson's most famous battle, the Battle of New Orleans (January 8, 1815), was fought two weeks after the War of 1812 ended when the Treaty of Ghent was signed in Europe. Thousands died because of slow communications.

2. The experts are often wrong.

A studio executive looking at Fred Astaire's screen test said, "Can't act. Can't sing. Can dance a little." Hollywood producer Darryl Zanuck panned Clark Gable's screen test saying, "His ears are too big. He looks like an ape." Both of the people who were so rudely rejected went on to be big stars.

3. Averages don't matter.

You can drown in a puddle that has an average depth of six inches. Averages don't always tell the whole story. If the puddle is big enough, it could be one-inch deep for most of its surface, and also have a six-foot-deep sink hole. To really know what you are talking about, you have to deal with the most accurate, clearest, and most specific facts you can get.

4. Good works carry far.

The sun is about 93 million miles (150 million kilometers) away from the Earth, but it provides us with virtually all our light, warmth, and energy. You don't have to be on the scene to have a positive impact.

5. Things add up.

A dollar invested at 10 percent interest, compounded annually, almost doubles in seven years, and if the legendary $24 dollars paid for Manhattan in 1624 had been invested at 6 percent, compounded annually, it would be worth over $74 billion today. Every little difference you make today can contribute to changing the future.

6. We are all related.

Current genetic research indicates that all humans now on earth are descended from a few different females. If you are arguing with someone, think about the fact that you may well be arguing with a cousin.

7. It's worth trying.

In baseball, if you only strike out twice for each hit you get, you are hitting .333 and you are considered a batting champ. It doesn't matter if you miss now and then, as long as you are ready to take a swing.

Pro Tips

Have something to say.

Unless you are good looking enough to be on magazine covers, no one is there just to look at you. The audience wants you to have something to say — ideally something you feel strongly about.

If you don't believe what you are saying, your audience certainly won't either. Let them know why you are talking. Tell them why they should care about the topic. If you're giving a sales pitch, don't forget to ask for the order. If you're talking about disaster relief, ask the audience for their prayers, and perhaps their money.

Be yourself.

Dr. Benjamin Spock's legendary advice to parents, "You know more than you think you do," is also good advice to speakers. You know how to speak. You've been in audiences, congregations, or classes. You know what works and what doesn't. Use your common sense and do what is most comfortable.

Forget the fact that you're speaking to a crowd. Imagine you're speaking to a close friend. Use the words that you would normally use, not the big impressive ones you find in the dictionary. If you normally use big gestures, use even bigger ones when you speak.

If you are really comfortable, leave the lectern and walk around. Walk into the audience. Sit on the stage. The more comfortable you are with the audience, the more comfortable they will be with you.

Take control.

The first two minutes of a speech are the moments when you have to grab your audience's attention. Remember: You are talking to people who do most of their viewing and listening with a remote control in their hand, ready to surf past anything that doesn't grab them within six seconds. You have to know your greeting and your first three sentences cold so you can look straight into your audience's eyes as you deliver your opening.

Your greeting is important. If you were personally introduced, start with a short thank you while you are looking toward the person who made the introduction. Don't bother to thank videotaped introductions. Next, with your head up and eyes to the audience, give them a hearty "Good morning" or "Hello there." Don't go for one of those long "Ladies and gentlemen, distinguished guests, esteemed colleagues and brothers in the Distinguished Knighthood of Turtles" openings unless tradition demands it. The point is to establish a dialogue with the audience.

If you want the audience to talk back to you, now's the time to get the process started. If they don't say hello back, clear your throat and say hello again with an expectant look. When you get an answer, say, "That's better."

If you didn't like how you were introduced, correct the introduction in the first five minutes. We saw a speaker catch a fading audience by saying, "I was introduced as the president of a company, but that shouldn't mean anything to you. My real credentials are that I was a field salesman for 20 years. My right arm is longer than my left from carrying a bag. I still have 1,200 mini-bottles of hotel shampoo to go through. The only difference is that now I have to be more careful about my expense reports, to set a good example."

(Continues…)

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Excerpted from "Last Minute Speeches and Toasts"
by .
Copyright © 2001 Andrew Frothingham.
Excerpted by permission of Red Wheel/Weiser, LLC.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.

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Table of Contents

Introduction,
Part I: About Speaking,
How to Use This Book,
How to Choose and Use Quotes and Jokes,
The 3-Step Fail-Safe Structure for a Speech,
Stick to 4 Points,
5 Killer Opening Strategies,
6 Last Minute Resources,
7 Facts That Can Spice Up Almost Any Speech,
Pro Tips,
Questions to Ask,
Your Fallback: Speak About Speaking,
The Art of Using AV,
The Tricks of Toasting,
Proper Roasting,
What's a Keynote?,
Being the MC,
Dealing with Future Speaking Invitations,
Part II: Gems You Can Use,
Addiction, Substance Abuse, and Moderation,
America,
Animals,
Anniversaries,
Art,
Awards — Accepting,
Awards — Presenting,
Babies,
Bachelor,
Banquet,
Baseball,
Beauty,
Birthdays,
Bride,
Challenge,
Change,
Charity,
Children,
Civil Rights,
Community,
Conventions,
Criticism,
Dispute,
Drinking,
Education,
Environment,
Ethics,
Faith,
Family,
Farewell and Retirement,
Fathers,
Friendship,
Fund-raising,
Future,
Golf,
Grace,
Graduation,
Guests and Hosts,
Health and Illness,
History,
Justice,
Leadership,
Library,
Love,
Medicine,
Memorial and Funeral,
Military,
Mothers,
Music and Recital,
Neighbors,
Parents,
Peace,
Politics,
Pride,
Prosperity,
Protest,
Reunions,
Roast — Giving,
Roast — Being the Target,
Sales,
School,
Science,
Sports,
Teamwork,
Tennis,
Theater,
Tragedy and Misfortune,
Travel,
Tribute,
Volunteerism,
Voting,
Weddings,