In the Presence of Grief: Helping Family Members Resolve Death, Dying, and Bereavement Issues

by Dorothy S. Becvar Phd

Overview

Illuminating the impact of loss and grief on our psychological and emotional lives, this book provides vital guidance to ease painful transitions and facilitate healing. The author emphasizes that dealing with the death of a loved one involves more than picking up the pieces and moving on: rather, healing is an ongoing journey on which grief is a constant companion. For those in a supportive role, the focus is on helping the bereaved to navigate the grieving process and, ultimately, to reclaim joy as well as sadness as an integral part of life. Filled with personal narratives and examples, the book demonstrates effective ways to help survivors cope with commonly experienced issues, problems, and concerns. This compassionate and hopeful work is essential reading for anyone working or living in the presence of grief.

The book begins with a clear overview of death, dying, and bereavement issues, interweaving contemporary clinical perspectives and research findings with evocative firsthand accounts. Described are the variety of contexts in which death may occur, as well as the unique ways that grief may be experienced. Chapters address such topics as the differences between unanticipated and anticipated death and challenges that may emerge around end-of-life issues and care of the dying. Included are in-depth discussions of different kinds of loss, including the death of a child, sibling, parent, spouse, or extended family member or friend. Each chapter is introduced by a personal account from an individual who has suffered that kind of loss, and concludes with a case example derived from the author's clinical practice. Throughout, innovative ideas are presented for helping individuals and families share their stories, find meaning in their experience, and create funerals and other rituals.

This book provides essential insights and strategies for practitioners working with families, including psychologists, family therapists, psychiatrists, social workers, and counselors; physicians and nurses in palliative care settings; and hospice professionals, as well as students in these areas. While written for professionals, the book's lucid, personal style and sensitive coverage of universal themes will also make it suitable for many general readers.

SHORT COPY
Illuminating the impact of loss and grief on our psychological and emotional lives, this book provides vital information to ease painful transitions and facilitate healing. The author emphasizes that dealing with the death of a loved one involves more than picking up the pieces and moving on: rather, survivors live indefinitely in the presence of grief. For those in a supportive role, the focus is on helping the bereaved to navigate the grieving process and, ultimately, to reclaim joy as well as sadness as an integral part of life. The book explores pathways to recovery from different kinds of loss, including the death of a child, sibling, parent, spouse, or extended family member or friend, as well as challenges that may emerge around care of the dying and issues at the end of life. Personal accounts and therapeutic case material are interwoven with practical suggestions for helping individuals and families share their stories, find meaning in their experience, and create funerals and other rituals. While written for professionals, the book's lucid, personal style and sensitive coverage of universal themes make it suitable for many general readers as well.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781572306974
Publisher:	Guilford Publications, Inc.
Publication date:	09/24/2001
Pages:	284
Product dimensions:	6.00(w) x 9.00(h) x 0.81(d)

About the Author

Dorothy S. Becvar, PhD, until her death in 2021, was a therapist, teacher, and trainer based in St. Louis, Missouri. She cofounded and directed the St. Louis Family Institute and later The Haelan Centers, a not-for-profit organization dedicated to promoting the growth and wholeness of clients in body, mind, and spirit. Dr. Becvar published extensively and presented workshops and courses nationally and internationally on a wide variety of topics. She served on the faculties of the University of Missouri–St. Louis, St. Louis University, Texas Tech University, Washington University, and Radford University.

Table of Contents

Contents
Foreword
Preface

I. The Contexts of Grief
1. Introduction
2. Understanding Death, Dying, and Bereavement
3. When Death Comes Unannounced
4. When Death Is Anticipated
5. When the Question of Euthanasia Emerges
6. When a Child Dies
7. When a Sibling Dies
8. When a Parent Dies
9. When a Spouse Dies
10. When an Extended Family Member or Friend Dies

II. Grief in the Context of Therapy
11. Creating Funerals, Ceremonies, and Other Healing Rituals
12. Searching for Meaning
13. Reclaiming Joy

Interviews

For practitioners working with families, including psychologists, family therapists, psychiatrists, social workers, and counselors; physicians and nurses in palliative care settings; and hospice professionals, as well as students in these areas.

Editorial Reviews

"Death and loss are the most profound challenges that families face, and are further complicated by agonizing dilemmas concerning end-of-life decisions. This timely volume brings clarity and wisdom to the issues confronting families and family therapists, drawing from the author's rich clinical experience as well as her own personal journey. Novice and experienced clinicians will find this book of enormous value in their practices and in the presence of grief in their own lives."—Froma Walsh, PhD, University of Chicago and Chicago Center for Family Health

"Becvar has succeeded in writing a humane and highly informative book. Her writing arises from personal as well as clinical experience, which contributes to the book's warm and engaging tone. In contrast to most existing works on the subject, the book includes many firsthand accounts that bring to life such themes as the search for meaning and the need to reclaim joy. These narratives inspire hope and show how we can grow as human beings from this universal form of suffering. I will not hesitate to make this book 'required reading' for clients in the midst of grieving, particularly those with few supports in their lives."—Dolores Gallagher-Thompson, PhD, ABPP, VA Palo Alto Health Care System and Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Sciences, Stanford University School of Medicine

"From a veteran family therapist and author, this book provides a wise, comprehensive, and sensitive approach to a universal human experience. Clearly illustrating the contemporary understanding that grief is never completed, Becvar emphasizes the uniqueness of the grieving process for each individual. She does not attempt to offer a laundry list or recipe for providing therapy, but instead offers a framework of understanding and rich examples of assistance and support that leave the way open for clinicians from various orientations to employ their own techniques. The role of spirituality among those from diverse value orientations is respectfully woven into the fabric of the book, as is attention to issues of gender and ethnicity. An unusually thorough guide for helping professionals, this book will also serve as a major source of understanding and healing for lay readers. In addition, it will be a useful text for graduate courses in family therapy, clinical psychology, social work, and counseling."—William C. Nichols, EdD, ABPP, Past President, International Family Therapy Association; Past President, American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy; Past President, National Council on Family Relations; Editor, Contemporary Family Therapy: An International Journal

"This is an intelligent, compassionate clinical companion—richly textured, humane, and moving. Beyond simply describing a narrative approach, the book embodies one. Becvar focuses on the ways that bereaved clients typically live in two realities: the presence of grief and the capacity to experience joy. She offers useful strategies, reflections, case vignettes, and therapeutic conversations that will be helpful to novice and seasoned clinicians from all disciplines."—Maureen Leahey, RN, PhD, Calgary Health Region Family Therapy Training Program, Calgary, Alberta, Canada

From the Publisher

"This is an excellent resource for clinicians, pastors, grief counselors, professors, and anyone else concerned with caring for those who grieve. It is uniquely thorough and insightful, well written, and admirably humane in its tone."

Family Ministry

Reviewer: Lisa Stepp, PhD, RN, APN, AOCN, CRNH (Private Practice)
Description: In 1989, healthcare professionals and the general population became more involved in discussion regarding end of life decisions. Patients and family members became interested in their treatment options and began to contemplate the quality and quantity of their lives. However, embarking on this new area of autonomy, individuals were faced for the first time with ethical and moral decisions that they felt unprepared to make. Furthermore, there was very little to support them through the grieving process.
Purpose: This book seeks to explore the impact of the death experience on our psychological and emotional lives. Those involved in patient care have long realized the importance of the holistic approach to patient treatment, but during end of life care we also recognize that our care must extend to all those who are affected by the death. The authors of this book provide a framework to help family members resolve bereavement issues. The author's narrative style demonstrates effective ways to complete this process. She draws from many years of experience to provide a compassionate insight to this difficult issue.
Audience: The vocabulary and writing style make this book most appropriate for clinicians. Other books that provide personal experiences may be more appropriate for patients and lay people.
Features: The topics covered range from basic mechanics of grief to ethical issues that surround the grieving process. Although there are numerous books that discuss grief, this book directly address the grief that surrounds the death of a child. The accounts bring a personal touch to the discussion and remind the reader that theory is useless unless it can be applied to actual situations and individuals.
Assessment: The book is easy to read and the author uses a framework of understanding that provides clinicians direction and interventions that have been successfully employed in the area of grief counseling.

Doody's Review Service

"All authors aspire to make an impact. A few succeed. Dorothy Becvar's work is an example of such an achievement. ...Clinicians will find many ideas that can be applied immediately in their day-to-day work with families and individuals. This book will help students at all levels understand the main issues of resolution and grief."

Death Studies

3 Stars from Doody