In the Eye of the Hurricane: Skills to Calm and De-escalate Aggressive Mentally Ill Family Members

by Ellis Amdur

Overview

Individuals suffering from psychiatric or substance use disorders sometimes display any one of a number of frightening behaviors: verbal outbursts, physical threats and even violence. In this comprehensive guidebook, Ellis Amdur walks families through a multitude of strategies they can use to keep themselves, and their mentally ill family member safe. Amdur s focus is based on behavior rather than diagnosis. The first sections of the book discuss specific behaviors ranging from such relatively minor irritants as reluctance to complete tasks and obsessive concerns to more troubling, pervasive syndromes such as psychosis, mania and disorganization. In one very important section, he discusses interactions with manipulative individuals, people who present danger to the psychological and physical well being of everyone in your family. In the second major section of the book, he focuses on us: what we can do to achieve a state of integrity and powerful calm. Rather than abstract pronouncements, he offers specific strategies, including a method of breathing that is for the purpose of maintaining one s center in crisis situations. He then moves on to direct face-to-face encounters, covering situations that can occur anywhere: in the community, at your residence, on the street, or even your car. Instruction includes how to handle tense situations before they deteriorate into chaos, and how to manage a crisis once it has started, whether it concerns an adult or a young person. He instructs you on how to instantly recognize what mode of aggression the person is in, and then, well-trained and practiced, how to almost instantaneously shift into the correct de- escalation tactic that fits the aggression one is facing.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781718956629
Publisher:	CreateSpace Publishing
Publication date:	01/01/2011
Pages:	272
Product dimensions:	8.50(w) x 11.00(h) x 0.57(d)

About the Author

Ellis Amdur received his BA in psychology from Yale University in 1974 and his MA in psychology from Seattle University in 1990. He is both a National Certified Counselor and a State Certified Child Mental Health Specialist. Since the late 1960s, Amdur trained in various martial arts systems, spending thirteen years studying in Japan. He is a recognized expert in classical and modern Japanese martial traditions and has authored three iconoclastic books as well as one instructional DVD on this subject. Since his return to America in 1988, Ellis Amdur has worked in the field of crisis intervention. He has developed a range of training and consultation services, as well as a unique style of assessment and psychotherapy. These are based on a combination of phenomenological psychology and the underlying philosophical premises of classical Japanese martial traditions. Amdur's professional philosophy can best be summed up in this idea: the development of an individual's integrity and dignity is the paramount virtue. This can only occur when people live courageously, regardless of the circumstances, and take responsibility for their roles in making the changes they desire. Ellis Amdur is a dynamic public speaker and trainer who presents his work throughout the United States and internationally. He is noted for his sometimes outrageous humor as well as his profound breadth of knowledge. His vivid descriptions of aggressive and mentally ill people and his true-to-life role playing of the behaviors in question give participants an almost firsthand experience of facing the real individuals in question. His books are considered unique in that he uses his own experiences, often hair-raising or outrageous, as illustrations of the principles about which he writes, but it is also backed by solid research, and boots-on-the-ground experience.

Table of Contents

IN THE EYE OF THE HURRICANE – Table of Contents

Section I

1 It’s Hard to Stay Centered in a Hurricane

2 “I’ve Got All the Time I Need”

3 Enhancing Empathy

4 Honing Your Intuition

5 It’s Not Personal Unless You Make It So

6 Circular Breathing

7 The Intoxication and Joy of Righteous Anger

8 A Fair Witness

Section II

9 Communication with Concrete Thinkers

10 High Functioning Autism

11 Information Processing and Retention

12 Coping with Stubborn Refusals

13 Coping with Repetitive Demands, Questions, and Obsessions

14 The Need for Reassurance

15 Dealing with Individuals with Pronounced Mood Swings

16 Moving Past the Past

17 Coping with Lack of Motivation

18 Useful Tactics for Dealing with Symptoms of Paranoia and Persecution

Section III

19 Borderline Personality Disorder and Splitting

20 Recognizing the Strategies of Opportunistic and Manipulative Family Members

Section IV

21 Dealing with the Symptoms of Disorganization

22 Dropping Stones in a Well: Latency

23 Withdrawal from Intoxicating Substances

24 Psychosis

25 Communication with Someone Who is Experiencing Delusions or Hallucinations

26 Tactics for Dealing with Symptoms of Mania

27 Communication and De-escalation with Elderly Family Members

Section V

28 Why Would You Suspect Your Family Member is Suicidal?

29 The Essentials of Intervention with Someone You Believe Might Be Suicidal

30 The Four Questions

31 Further Discussion with Your Loved One When They are Suicidal

32 Self-Mutilation and Parasuicidal Behavior

Section VI

33 The Nature of Aggression

34 Why Would Someone Become Aggressive?

35 What Does Escalation Look Like?

Section VII

36 Core Principles of Intervention with Angry People

37 Physical Organization in the Face of Aggression

38 The Tone and Quality of Your Voice

39 Preemptive De-escalation

40 Across the Spectrum of Anger

41 Essential Strategies for De-escalating Anger

42 Paraphrasing

43 Guidelines on Limit Setting

44 What Doesn’t Work

Section VIII

45 Communication with Potentially Aggressive Youthful Family Members

46 A Consideration of the Impulsive Child

47 Conduct Disorder

48 Explosive Kids

49 Opposition-Defiant Kids

50 PTSD in Young People

51 Pseudo–Nihilism

Section IX

52 Preface to Rage

53 Chaotic Rage

54 Terrified Rage

55 Hot Rage

56 Predatory or Cool Rage

57 De-escalation of Developmentally Disabled Individuals: Special Considerations

58 When Facing Violence

59 The Aftermath: What to Do Now?

60 Conclusion

Appendix I When Monitoring Medications is Part of Your Responsibilities

Appendix II Crisis Intervention Teams for Law Enforcement

Editorial Reviews

Just wanted to send a quick note of appreciation for your book In the Eye of the Hurricane. I’ve recommended it to a couple of clients, who have found it quite helpful. In both instances, these are people who are caretakers of abusive mothers- a phenomenon that will likely continue to grow. Last night, I met with three sisters, all in their 60’s, who brought in your book complete with highlights and post-it notes for assistance in creating the tools they need in dealing with their elderly mom, how has borderline personality disorder. Not only does this help them get through the day-to-day, more importantly, it gives them an opportunity to form a different relationship prior to their mom’s passing, something that is pretty cool.

Treina Aronson, LMHC

Following your de-escalation training for our Agency, I purchased In the Eye of the Hurricane for a co-worker. When talking to her today, she told me that your book had profoundly changed the way she interacts with her mentally ill family members. My coworker herself seems much less angry and volatile, now that she is handling the confusing actions of her family in a more positive manner. Thank you so much for the fantastic work that you do!

A Participant in a Grace Under Fire seminar on Worksite Safety

This book has solutions for almost any situation when you're dealing with a mentally ill family member. I am going to use this as my bible for dealing with a mentally ill sibling. Bravo Ellis Amdur for writing this book. You are a saint and that's the absolute truth. Thank you, thank you, and THANK YOU again!!!

Alabama Bridgette

From the Publisher