I'm the Vampire, That's Why

by Michele Bardsley

Overview

Sink your teeth into the first novel in New York Times bestselling author Michele Bardsley's Broken Heart series.

Broken Heart is the city with the highest rate of divorce and highest percentage of single parents in Oklahoma. And I, Jessica Matthews, have been a member of that club ever since my husband dumped me for his twenty-something secretary and then had the gall to die in a car accident.

Now I’m not just a single mother trying to make ends meet in this crazy world...I’m also a vampire. One minute I was taking out the garbage; the next I awoke sucking on the thigh of superhot vampire Patrick O’Halloran, who’d generously offered his femoral artery to save me.

But though my stretch marks have disappeared and my vision has improved, I can’t rest until the thing that did this to me is caught. My kids’ future is at stake—figuratively and literally. As is my sex life. Although I wouldn’t mind finding myself attached to Patrick’s juicy thigh again, I learned that once a vampire does the dirty deed, it hitches her to the object of her affection for at least one hundred years. I just don’t know if I’m ready for that kind of commitment...

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781101647585
Publisher:	Penguin Publishing Group
Publication date:	09/05/2006
Series:	Broken Heart Series , #1
Sold by:	Penguin Group
Format:	eBook
Pages:	352
Sales rank:	409,414
File size:	419 KB
Age Range:	18 Years

About the Author

Michele Bardsley is the New York Times bestselling author of the Broken Heart series.

Read an Excerpt

Vampires suck.

 “Who else shared your blood?” I asked.
 The question surprised him. He settled into his chair, assuming his previous devil-may-care attitude. And he remained silent…;
 “What’s the matter, love? Are you jealous? Patrick’s voice was inside my head. Inside my freaking head! Well, if he could be in my mind, that meant I could be in his. No, I am not jealous! I sent out a scorching wave of fury right into his brain. I grinned in satisfaction when his head jerked as if he’d been slapped.
 His brows rose in either surprise or acquiescence. Only one other, he admitted, but I do not claim her. Before I could ask just what the hell that meant, the rear door to the gym squealed open and we all heard the slapping of flip-flops on the waxed floor. The hair on my nape rose and I felt a snarl catch in my throat.
 “Sorry, I’m late,” said the soft voice of a young woman. “My son—”
 Her voice choked off as I stood up and whirled around. The fury I’d just directed at Patrick was nothing compared to the rage burning inside me now.
 One more new vampire had joined our ranks. And it was the only person in town I’d want to see dead…;

Editorial Reviews

The Barnes & Noble Review
The hardships of single moms achieve new, comic heights in Michele Bardsley's paranormal romance. This is the story of Jessica Matthews, a soccer mom inadvertently turned vampire when she goes to take out the garbage. Turns out her hometown, Broken Heart, Oklahoma, has the highest rate of single parents -- and the highest population of vampires. Next thing you know, Jessica's sucking on the femoral artery of a red-hot Irish vampire, Patrick O'Halloran. She has officially joined the undead.

How Jessica manages to adjust to her new nonhuman nature, take care of her children by night and manage them remotely by day, come to terms with her late husband's infidelity, and find an eternal love is just part of the plot. Bardsley punctuates the story with Celtic Irish terms (there's even a glossary) and amusing references to The Princess Bride and the novels of Anne Rice. Ginger Curwen

When Jessica Matthews, a suburban divorcee and mother of two, gets savagely attacked one night by a werewolf, she awakens to find herself sucking blood from the thigh of 4,000-year-old vampire Patrick O'Halloran. He explains that the only way to have kept her from dying was to turn her into a vampire like himself. Now Jessica finds herself recruited to hunt the rampaging Lycan, who may be Patrick's brother, alongside Patrick and the mysterious paranormal organization called the Consortium. Bardsley has done considerable research into Celtic legends in order to create her vampire society, but her research doesn't make for a successful book. Rather than giving us, as the title would suggest, a satirical look at a soccer mom turned "sucker mom" attempting to balance normal daily life with a most abnormal nightlife, Bardsley focuses on Jessica's explicit sexual longing for Patrick and the mundane conflict between the Consortium and their evil counterparts, the Wraith. Though amusing at times, the meat of this vampire tale is oddly bloodless. (Sept.) Copyright 2006 Reed Business Information.

Publishers Weekly