Read an Excerpt
CHAPTER 1
Learning to Observe to determine Enneagram Types
You can take an Enneagram test, but that may not be definitive. Further, some of the tests available are poor examples of how to accurately determine your type. In addition, none of these tests discusses ways for you to type another person without that second person taking the test. You can study the Enneagram, but learning to determine another person's Enneagram Personality Type requires observation and/or an interview as well as observation. Typing is critical in anyone's understanding of the Enneagram. It enables a whole host of ways of understanding yourself as well as other people you successfully type. What wouldn't be great about being able to walk into a group of people and simply identifying their types based on observation? After reading this book, you'll be more comfortable with your ability to type people simply through observation.
Observing means observing characteristics or cues about a person's personality. Use the identifiers in this book as well as the different understandings of Enneagram personalities embedded in the following chapters to determine the cues and characteristics of each type.
A tip on typing: There are three body-oriented types, One, Eight, and Nine. These types tend to be more in their bodies and feel their bodies more or use their bodies when interacting with others. Eights use their bodies to communicate even more than Ones or Nines.
There are three heart types — also known as feeling types — the Two, Three, and Four. There are three mental types: Five, Six, and Seven. Mental types use their minds more than other types. Sometimes, one can narrow down the person whose type you are trying to figure out into one of these three categories. If the person is outwardly emotional or feeling oriented, through the process of elimination, you might identify the person as a heart type. If they seem to use their minds to respond to questions, or you, for example, observe them being thoughtful and thinking their responses rather than responding with feelings, you can narrow down the possibilities to one of the mental types. Further, Eights are very physical people with a lot of their energy in their bodies. This is not a foolproof way of observing type. Anyone can use body language to communicate. But if you observe the physical way an Eight communicates, you can then do your typing interview by focusing on the type Eight questions and identifiers that are listed in this book. Again, with feeling types, narrowing down the possibilities means you can focus on asking questions of the Two, Three, or Four types. Another good way to narrow down type possibilities is to just ask the person you are interviewing whether he or she is a feeling type of person or a mental one. (Body types don't always identify as body types the way feeling and mental types identify as feeling and mental types.) That is based on my experience with Types.
For example, some people can be typed simply by how they use or don't use body language. Have a conversation with someone who has a large physical presence; he uses his arms to emphasize his points, and he comes across as a little bit intimidating and forceful. If you can observe a person using body language in strong ways as part of how they communicate with others, you're on track for determining the type of that person to be an Eight. Similarly, if the person you want to type seems quiet and hesitant to talk to others, perhaps sits in the corner, is a bit aloof, and responds with his head or his mind, then he may be a Five. Perhaps he nods a lot; perhaps you can tell that when he interacts with others that he is thoughtful when he responds. If you notice him bouncing a leg up and down repeatedly, that is a telltale signature body movement of a Five. No other types bounce their leg the way Fives do. Here we have two examples of how to observe and still successfully type. A note about observing to determine type — you aren't just looking at and listening for body language. There are other parts of the Enneagram (such as passions, fixations of attention, energy, energy structure, identification with language used by the person being typed by you, and core values of the different types) that you need to develop an ability to observe. So, a Five bounces his leg. That's his energy, located in the legs, that causes him to bounce. This is a trait of Fives. And the Eight comes across in a challenging confrontational manner; seeing the Eight's energy pick up when he uses his body language is yet another way of observing energy on the Enneagram. Each type has its own Enneagram energy structure, and that manifests in the way they communicate. This book will talk about how to observe in general, what to observe, and how to use those observations to determine type.
A second way to determine Enneagram type is to ask others questions about themselves. This doesn't have to be a test at all. It can simply be a friendly desire to understand the other person by asking some questions in order to bring out their personality type. This way of typing requires you to have decent Enneagram knowledge about each type. You can get that knowledge from other Enneagram books or workshops in addition to this book. You can also do a proper typing interview using the different identifiers or statements in this book. The chapters of the nine types of personalities in this book are designed for you to not only better understand the Enneagram in general but also to be used as a way of determining Enneagram personalities by asking questions. Use the identifiers in this book by turning them into questions to conduct a proper interview.
Observing and interviewing are the two primary ways of determining another person's Enneagram type. Observing can be seen as a skill learned through practice. You can learn to observe body language, facial expressions, energy pickups (meaning when a person's energy seems to increase and come out of them), energy structures (like the Five bouncing his leg), language used, and word choices coupled with energy pickups. Learning to observe what another person identifies with can be a difficult task and a bit confusing at first. Further, one can combine observations with questions.
For example, "Do you identify with x?" Therefore, we have making observations, doing a typing interview, and what I like most — observations coupled with questions.
When you ask people questions that are aimed at determining their Enneagram type, the best thing to do is to see if their answers to these questions are coming from the person's heart. If they start to get interested in the question or topic, if their energy picks up in excitement or interest, if they identify with the question or the answer, and if they agree with it in a way that reflects that their feelings go that way, you've made a great leap into figuring out their Enneagram type.
One exercise you can try is to ask questions of those whose Enneagram type you already know. Watch how their responses reveal their type. Learn to observe what they identify with. What questions are you asking that cause them to come out and become more interested in your conversation? Watching a person's energy pick up when asked certain questions can reveal which Enneagram Type they are. By practicing on someone whose Enneagram type you already know, you are learning what questions and answers resonate with that Type.
If a person agrees with having an inner critic, but does so in a lukewarm way, it is best to keep going through the other types before concluding with certainty that the person is a type One. It may be the case that a person being interviewed by you agrees with many parts of type One and type Two. The way to give more certainty to figuring out their type accurately is to watch and observe what kind of way they are responding to questions. Meaning, again, watching for excitement, or their feelings coming out on a particular topic or identifier. If their feelings come out more when asked a Two question/identifier, then they are more likely to be that type.
This isjust an introduction to how you will learn to determine the type of people in your life. We'll go through each type and articulate ways of observing them. In the end, I hope you will use this book to determine the type of people in your life and/or anyone at all you encounter.
Doing a proper typing interview is the final way of figuring out someone's Enneagram type. The final chapter in this book discusses how to do that in a systematic way.
As I have said above, figuring out the Enneagram type of another person correctly and quite quickly creates a level of acceptance. If you have some knowledge of the Enneagram, then you immediately accept that their type is to do, feel, and act on certain characteristics of the type. For example, knowing that your friend is a type One immediately makes you accept that their criticism of themselves and others, their desire for correctness, to do the right thing, is part of who they are and not necessarily something that you should feel badly about or judge. That acceptance is the genius of the Enneagram. Understanding that type One has an inner critic that is often critical of themselves can help you to have compassion and empathy for type One. They suffer from their inner critic and respond or react to it more than other types do.
Another good point to raise about typing others is that the grip that the Enneagram Personality Type has on us is strongest in our twenties and thirties. As we get older, this grip lessens even though we primarily identify with only one Enneagram type. When asking questions of prospective types, it can be helpful to ask them if a particular issue or subject was more prominent for them in their twenties and thirties.
CHAPTER 2
Type One
Go through this chapter and the chapters that follow and turn the bullet point lists of identifiers into questions.
Ones are known as perfectionists. It makes sense since they are often trying to do the right thing. Again, the One may not see themselves as a perfectionist at first, but once you can see them being correct or correcting others and doing this as a way of relating to the world around them while at the same time noticing how frequently the One tries to fix the wrong in the environment, you can help that One understand themselves as a perfectionist.
• It can be good to just ask the prospective types whether they see themselves as a perfectionist.
The One has a fixation of attention that looks for error as well as correctness or incorrectness in their external and internal environments. The One watches out for the opportunity to correct themselves or others. If you find a person correcting errors in their surroundings, that person could be a One. Determining Enneagram type is a bit like making an educated guess. It is not a science; rather, it is an art. See if you can figure out the fixation of attention for the One by watching what he or she pays attention to. If you can see errors in your own environment and then see if the prospective One corrects the error, you're probably going to see correctly that the person is type One.
• A great question to ask the One is if he or she experiences an inner critic frequently talking to them. All Ones have an internal critic telling them in their thoughts what should or shouldn't be done. They are critical people who think in terms of correctness. You might say that everyone has an internal critic, but for type Ones, this is something they strongly identify with. Everyone can think in terms of criticality or correctness, but the One does this as a way of relating to the world around them. Thus, Ones identify with their inner critic as being part of their internal selves more strongly than other types do.
A certain amount of the Enneagram involves unconscious behavior that someone may not be fully aware of. For example, the person who is a One but doesn't realize they have a fixation of attention that watches for errors or incorrectness is typical of that person before he or she comes into the Enneagram material. Once shown their fixation, they can develop an ability to observe their own fixation of attention. Asking the Ones if they pay attention to error in their environment may or may not bring out their type's energy or intelligence. Instead, showing the person their fixation of attention is to pay attention to error is a way to educate the person you want to type about his or her internal selves. If you can observe a One's fixation of attention, you can then bring it out of the One. Point it out right after the One corrects something. When it happens again, point it out again. The fixation of attention is a repeating pattern; it keeps happening and not infrequently. It happens throughout the day, each day, for that person's entire lifetime.
• Ones are judgmental and critical people. Ask if they identify with being this way.
• Ones experience themselves as good people, trying to do what is correct, just, or moral. This is another identifier for type One.
Their passion on the Enneagram is anger; it does not mean they are angry people or get angry frequently. What it means is that anger, often in subtle ways, comes out of them through their criticality and judgmental selves. A tinge of anger accompanies their critical statements. See if you can observe their anger when they get critical. Ones are sometimes a little bit angry; their anger leaks out of them. You aren't looking for an outburst of anger; rather, you're observing slight anger through criticality. This criticality can be towards themselves or others.
• If the One has an outburst of anger, the next internal step for the One is tojudge that anger. Ask prospective Ones whether they judge themselves after getting it wrong (anger being a "wrong" emotion). Ask Ones whether they judge their anger after getting angry. This is an example of self-criticality.
• Ones seek to improve the world in various ways; they are also called reformers. They try to reduce disorder in their environment. Ask if they do this. Something to note: many people might identify with the statement that they try to reduce disorder in their environment. A way to narrow it down to type One is to ask if they do this on a frequent basis and whether they feel part of their personality is to improve the world in various ways. Also, remember to ask if the person identifies as doing this more so in their twenties and thirties (when the grip of the Enneagram Personality Type is strongest).
• Integrity, being good, and doing good are values that the One has. Ask them if these values resonate with them. Also, they have a self-image of being sensible, moderate, and objective. Ones reinforce their self-image by trying to live their lives in accordance with their conscience and reason. They are highly ethical and self-disciplined and possess a strong sense of purpose and conviction. Truthful and articulate, they teach by example, putting aside personal desires for the greater good. Ask the One if these statements resonate. If yes, you can conclude that they are likely to be type Ones.
• Ones may sometimes feel they are wasting time if they are not improving themselves and their environment in some way.
• Ones have intuition regarding doing the right thing. They have an ability to know how to do the right thing, particularly regarding moral values.
• Ones frequently engage in self-criticism. They can be very sensitive to their inner critic, feeling as though they need to measure up to it.
• Ones care deeply about being good people and are moved into action by wanting to do something about the problems they see around them. This might manifest as wanting to save the environment, alleviate poverty, or do something for those less fortunate. Ones firmly believe they can make a difference.
Acceptance
Knowing that Ones have a serious inner critic can lead you to have more love, compassion, and acceptance of a type One. You know that they are suffering from their inner critic and basically just trying to do the right thing. Their point of view on the Enneagram is to be a perfectionist. If you see their perfectionist behavior as part of their way of relating to the world, you can navigate these people better. You can say to yourself that the criticism they make of others is coming from a desire to make improvements and make things better. You might also find compassion knowing that the One is hard on himself and suppresses his desire for pleasure by being critical of himself and others. You might also understand the passion of the One is anger, and if you notice his criticality coming with some anger directed at you, you can forgive that anger since you know is just part of the One's personality structure. His passion makes him angry, and he expresses that anger through criticism or criticality. Ones are hard on themselves. Their inner critic makes it this way. Talk to the One about his inner critic and bring out his feelings and thoughts about his inner critic. You will open up to each other. You will develop love, acceptance, and forgiveness by just having an in-depth conversation about the One's inner critic.
(Continues…)
Excerpted from "How to Determine the Enneagram Personality Type of Others"
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Copyright © 2017 Josen Kalra.
Excerpted by permission of Balboa Press.
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