For Teenagers Living With a Parent Who Abuses Alcohol/Drugs
162
For Teenagers Living With a Parent Who Abuses Alcohol/Drugs
162eBook
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Overview
Product Details
| ISBN-13: | 9781504036702 |
|---|---|
| Publisher: | Open Road Distribution |
| Publication date: | 05/03/2016 |
| Sold by: | Barnes & Noble |
| Format: | eBook |
| Pages: | 162 |
| File size: | 263 KB |
| Age Range: | 11 - 18 Years |
About the Author
Read an Excerpt
For Teenagers Living with a Parent Who Abuses Alcohol/Drugs
By Edith Lynn Hornik-Beer
OPEN ROAD INTEGRATED MEDIA
Copyright © 2013 Edith Hornik-BeerAll rights reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-5040-3670-2
CHAPTER 1
Alcoholism and Other Substance Abuses
If alcohol is a drug why list it separately from other addictive drugs?
Alcohol can be obtained legally and without a prescription. Social drinkers or people who occasionally have one or two drinks are usually not affected adversely.
What is alcoholism?
Alcoholism is a disease of the body, mind and spirit. Alcoholics are as sick as people who have tuberculosis or diabetes. People who are alcoholics are excessive drinkers. They cannot always stop at one or two drinks. Most alcoholics start out with the same intentions as the nonalcoholic: to have no more than one or two drinks. The nonalcoholics, or so-called social drinkers, can stop when they choose. Alcoholics cannot. For alcoholics, drinking becomes a compulsion. They are victims of their own compulsion. They will drink to quiet their nerves, their unhappiness, or to avoid making an important decision.
My father drinks only on weekends. Is it the number of times a person drinks each week or the quantity of alcohol consumed that describes an alcoholic?
Neither. There may be periods — weeks or months — when an alcoholic does not drink. The important point is that when alcoholics drink they lose control of their actions. The drinking may eventually damage them physically and mentally. It can keep them from performing their job and from getting along with family and with neighbors.
If alcoholics know they can't drink, why don't they just get hold of themselves and stop drinking?
It is a physical and not a moral illness. The body metabolizes the alcohol poorly, but the mind tells the alcoholics that they can drink. Their spirits tell them they need to drink to handle their fears and anxities.
I feel if I could just keep my father from seeing alcohol he would give it up. Should I throw out all the bottles in the house?
Teenagers have wanted to throw out the liquor in the house or ask friends not to drink in the alcoholic's presence. This will not solve the problem. You cannot prevent the alcoholic from coming close to alcohol any more than you can prevent a diabetic from seeing sweets. The problem is within the person and not in that bottle of alcohol.
How does drug addiction start?
Drug addiction can start in several ways. Sometimes it can start by taking prescription drugs for other reasons than for what they were prescribed. For instance a doctor may prescribe codeine after a painful surgery. The patient may like the dreamlike sensation and continue to take the prescription when no longer needed. I know of one woman whose mother was dying of cancer. The daughter "shared" her mother's pills. By the time the mother died the daughter had become addicted to pills.
A person may become an addict if she takes drugs regularly to forget a problem, to quiet unpleasant, nagging feelings, to calm nerves or to feel more adequate in social or work situations. Addicts become nervous and unhappy and lose control over their lives and actions. Whatever the reason they are unable to stop at will.
If the alcoholic or a drug addict needs help, why doesn't she go to a doctor?
In the early stages of addiction, addicts are usually not aware they are ill. Addiction is a progressive illness. Even when the addict becomes aware that all is not well, she may still be the last one to connect the illness with drug taking or drinking. It is this denial that keeps the addict and her family locked into the illness.
Why do some people vomit when they take drugs or drink alcohol?
Alcohol and drugs may irritate the lining of the stomach. It is this irritation that causes the gagging, nausea, and vomiting. There also can be an effect on the vomiting center in the brain.
What is meant by "passing out"?
Passing out is a loss of consciousness.
What causes this loss of consciousness?
Some drugs, including alcohol, sedate the brain and when taken excessively can cause a loss of consciousness and even death. Mixing drugs, including over-the-counter medication, can amplify the adverse effect.
The family of a drug abuser should be aware that mixing drugs can cause a person to pass out or, in some cases, death may result. For instance sleeping pills or tranquilizers, since their effect lasts longer when mixed with alcohol, can cause an alcoholic to pass out. Such a situation might be very serious even if he is used to alcohol. Furthermore, certain metabolic conditions such as diabetes or cirrhosis of the liver can cause unconsciousness even without alcohol or other drugs. It is good for everyone in the family to know if the substance abuser has such an illness so that if he were found unconscious, the family would be able to inform the attending doctor.
What is a blackout?
Some substances such as heroin or alcohol may cause temporary loss of memory.
For instance, when a heroin addict is in withdrawal, she may not remember the last four or five days.
In other cases, when a person drinks heavily and steadily and the brain becomes adapted to alcohol, she does not become unconscious as quickly as you or I would. In fact, she may act in a perfectly sober manner, but will have periods of time during which she has a loss of memory. Blackout is the term used to describe this temporary loss of memory.
Unless you have a reason to ask the addict if she remembers, you have no way of knowing whether she had a blackout. Sometimes the substance abuser will attempt to cover up for this memory loss because it is embarrassing. Usually the loss of memory is total and she will completely dispute the events that took place while the blackout was occurring.
While driving a car, the substance abuser may have hit another car and not remember the accident. If you know about blackouts, you will understand that this person is probably being as honest as she can when saying, "I don't remember." You will just have to accept this answer as the truth.
Do certain types of families tend toward substance abuse?
We know from studies that alcoholism and substance abuse may be hereditary. There are studies of children born to alcoholic families who were adopted as babies by nonalcoholic parents. Their rate of alcoholism was compared to children whose biological parents were not alcoholic, but were also adopted as infants. When these adopted children's adult years were carefully followed, it turned out that the children whose biological parents were alcoholic had much higher rates of alcoholism, even though they had not been raised by alcoholic parents.
Doctors are also gaining more insight into how we metabolize alcohol and other drugs. Some people metabolize drugs and alcohol more quickly than others. Furthermore, people have various levels of serotonin, a chemical related to our sense of energy, and dopamine, related to our sense of happiness. There are those who instead of exercising, socializing, or doing hobbies try to make themselves "feel good" and "raise the energy" with alcohol and/or drugs. Of course, we also hear of some in competitive sports who feel so tense that they take drugs to loosen up, feel better and perform better. Unfortunately, these substance abusers turn out to have problems with these chemicals.
Does this mean that I will suffer from substance abuse?
We are all susceptible to addiction. According to statistics, if you have at least one parent who is a substance abuser your chances of becoming a substance abuser is three to four times that of the general public, and that includes eating, gambling, and compulsive shopping. You need to be extra careful. It is similar to other diseases. Say you have a mother who became diabetic in her adult years, you will tell your doctor to check your blood sugar and you yourself will watch your diet.
Many young people simply do not experiment with any harmful drugs. They make friends with those who do not do drugs, because when you are around teenagers who abuse substances it's easy to copy those unhealthy ways to deal with feelings. Teenagers who refuse to do drugs meet people by joining groups that go hiking, dancing, do volunteer work, or are active in their church or synagogue. They join their drug-free friends' families for dinner and outings. This is discussed in greater detail in Chapters 9 and 14.
My parents are in treatment for addiction. My mother is a heavy marijuana smoker and my father likes to drink several six packs of beer in one evening. I went to counseling with them. My mother said she started smoking pot in high school and my father said that he started drinking beer in seventh grade. In my school I have noticed kids in fifth grade sniffing glue, and some smoking cigarettes. Are kids starting today at a younger age?
When compared to thirty years ago, more young people are drinking and experimenting with drugs at an earlier age. Counselors have noted that most who end up with addiction start out with a cigarette, then try alcohol ("just a beer"), and continue on to marijuana and cocaine.
My parents' counselor said that my father's drinking was already excessive and acute when he was a teenager. What is excessive and acute alcohol use?
There are different drinking habits among teenagers. Some teenagers drink regularly. Other teenagers and youths may drink less regularly, but when they drink they tend to consume larger amounts. These large amounts (or excessive and acute alcohol use) cause acute problems ranging from traffic fatalities to other alcohol-related injuries. Furthermore, both the teenagers who drink regularly and those who drink occasionally but excessively make themselves sick and are often impaired and unable to concentrate. Their drinking habits may keep them from completing their education and reaching the goals they desire.
Is this binge drinking?
Binge is a spree, a nonstop drinking or drugging party. This is extremely dangerous and can cause death.
I experimented with some drugs and found I actually liked it. Does that mean I am at risk even though I was only experimenting?
Yes. Be aware that your compulsion to experiment is a biochemical risk. When you take alcohol or drugs because it makes you feel better, it will in the end magnify your pain and leave you feeling worse. If you are truly taking drugs or alcohol, join Alcoholics Anonymous, Narcotics Anonymous or one of the other groups listed at the end of this book.
Do all teenagers experimenting with pot and alcohol become drug abusers?
Some "mature out" and do not become problem drinkers or drug abusers. A recent study has shown that adolescents with "problem behavior" have a higher risk of becoming substance abusers as adults.
What is "problem behavior"?
Problem behavior may include alienation from school, teachers, religion, or positive moral beliefs. Other problems include use of alcohol and other drugs and inappropriate sexual behavior. Teenagers who seek help from counselors or religious groups in order to deal with their problems and set goals for themselves may change their whole life in a positive way. Sometimes teenagers whose problem behavior does not get them into grave consequences may not take their problems seriously enough.
I do smoke pot occasionally. Does that make me an addict?
Ask yourself the following questions:
1) Is drinking or drug abuse affecting your reputation in school?
2) Do the kids you hang around with use drugs or drink in order to have fun?
3) Do you take time from school and homework so that you can drink or do drugs?
4) Are you frequently absent from school because you are sleepy or don't feel well?
5) Do you drink or use drugs because you are shy with other people?
6) Do you ever drink or use drugs alone? Smoke pot alone?
7) Is there a special time you do drugs or drink, such as Saturday nights or after school?
8) Do you use drugs or drink to avoid worrying or to calm your anger?
If you are worried about your drug habits or answered yes to any of these questions you should see a counselor or seek out Narcotics Anonymous or Alcoholics Anonymous. For further information you may want to look up some of the groups on the Internet listed at the end of this book.
Is using alcohol with marijuana dangerous?
Using alcohol and marijuana together is twice as dangerous as only drinking. Tests have shown that abilities and health were more impaired with alcohol and marijuana combined than with either drug alone.
What about using marijuana alone? My parents said they used marijuana when they were in school and still do now on weekends. They say that marijuana has medicinal properties and should be legalized.
Marijuana is a complex Hemp plant. Its risks outweigh its benefits. People who are addicted to marijuana may rationalize that it has a mild anti-nausea effect and some properties that may counteract glaucoma. However, the inhaled dose cannot be controlled and the side effects are dangerous. Pharmacies have excellent anti-nausea medicine and prescriptions to control glaucoma with fewer side effects.
Isn't it true though that on the whole marijuana is better than alcohol?
No, marijuana does not leave the body quickly. Alcohol is water-soluble. One ounce of alcohol is completely metabolized to water and carbon dioxide in two hours.
The difference between an occasional drink and an occasional joint is that you know exactly what is in a bottle of alcohol and that it is a legal drug.
A bottle of alcohol is labeled under government regulations with all of its ingredients.
The grass that comes from Mexico is different than grass from Asia or grass grown in the United States. Therefore, you are at the mercy of the one who sells or gives you the joint. Very often the seller or someone who gives you a joint has no way of knowing what strength or what type of grass is offered. You also don't know what pesticides were sprayed on the leaves.
Marijuana stays for days in your fatty tissues, including in your reproductive organs and the brain. Marijuana can impair your ability to drive a car, study, work, and in general reduces your energy. Marijuana draws people into an altered lifestyle and a dependence on a drug lifestyle. T.H.C., is the main active chemical in marijuana, accounts for most of marijuana's psychoactive/mind-altering effects. When marijuana is taken frequently there is a high accumulation of T.H.C. in the body since a single dose of T.H.C. takes thirty days to be completely eliminated.
Marijuana has more than four hundred known chemical toxins, and when burned, still other toxic compounds are produced. Tests have shown that chronic marijuana smoking can cause cellular damage. Tar from marijuana painted on the backs of animals has caused cancer. Marijuana can damage your immune system. It produces chronic irritation of nasal and lung passages. It suppresses the sex drive and can lead to erectile impotence.
If you are feeling down is it less dangerous to take prescription tranquilizers?
All drugs can be dangerous and addictive unless carefully prescribed by a physician. One physician in the field of substance abuse has called careless pill taking "eating your drug abuse."
My mother takes tranquilizers. She has been in car accidents and tends to sleep most of the day. It's like living with someone who isn't "completely here." I phoned my aunt, who said my mother's physician is prescribing mild pills while she is going through her divorce and is in counseling. I don't know what to do.
First of all your mother may have pills from more than one doctor. She can go to an internist and say, "I am sleeping poorly. I am sure it is just temporary." She may repeat the same statement to her gynecologist and her psychiatrist. She may be filling her prescriptions in different pharmacies. And she may not even be keeping them in her bathroom medicine cabinet. Try and notice when your mother's mind is clear — perhaps when your mother wakes up from her nap or in the morning. You may then want to tell her that you are worried about her. Tell her that you miss her old self. You may also want to phone each of her doctors and tell them what you have noticed and see if she is getting more than one prescription. You are for the moment not getting the parenting you need. You should discuss this with your own counselor who may suggest that you move in temporarily with your father, aunt, or whoever can provide you with a supportive home. You can get further aid by picking one of the help resources such as Narcotics Anonymous listed in the last chapter of this book.
What can one do if one feels bad? What is wrong in taking a tranquilizer to feel better?
Any tranquilizer needs to be administered carefully by a physician to make sure the patient does not become addicted to the prescription. Furthermore, the patient needs to find out what is making him feel bad. Is there a physical problem caused by a biological imbalance?
(Continues...)
Excerpted from For Teenagers Living with a Parent Who Abuses Alcohol/Drugs by Edith Lynn Hornik-Beer. Copyright © 2013 Edith Hornik-Beer. Excerpted by permission of OPEN ROAD INTEGRATED MEDIA.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
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Table of Contents
Contents
Preface,Introduction,
Editor's Note,
1. Alcoholism and Other Substance Abuses,
2. Are You Sure You Have a Substance Abuser in Your Family?,
3. Blackouts, Unkept Promises, Unfair Criticism, and Family Arguments,
4. Drug Dependencies and Your Parent's Job,
5. Problems Faced by Your Sober Parent,
6. Let's Take a Good Look at Ourselves,
7. Your Responsibility to Yourself and to Your Family,
8. It's Your School Life and Future,
9. Friends and Dating,
10. Can Addiction be Cured?,
11. When a Parent Stops Drugging and/or Drinking,
12. Counseling for the Teenager,
13. Alateen and Other Programs,
14. Internet and Helpful 800 Numbers,
Epilogue,
Acknowledgments,