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Overview
In Finding the Shaman, Debra Hillary reveals her path to becoming Rainbow Medicine Woman. She tells of her lifechoices, how she came to create a blended family while she grew spiritually, much the same as an aging river “finds a different way…to flow naturally”. If you have met Hillary, you will hear her voice leap from the pages, encouraging us to “live our lives with love, integrity and passion.”
- Carolyn Nesbitt, PhD, Registered Psychologist
Product Details
| ISBN-13: | 9781950540532 |
|---|---|
| Publisher: | Toplink Publishing, LLC |
| Publication date: | 04/03/2019 |
| Sold by: | Barnes & Noble |
| Format: | eBook |
| Pages: | 86 |
| File size: | 3 MB |
About the Author
Read an Excerpt
Finding the Shaman
Spiritual Journey Back to True Self
By Debra Lee Hillary
Balboa Press
Copyright © 2016 Debra Lee HillaryAll rights reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-5043-6126-2
CHAPTER 1
In the Beginning-Training Ground
I chose a whole family unit, with great wisdom and knowledge of human conditions.
Strong willed parents, who would teach me to be strong and fight for me too.
My family was comfortably well off, yet hard working.
I was born in the early sixties, a great time of change was occurring on the planet.
A revolution was about to begin. ... a change in consciousness.
Many of the baby boomers came in awake, with open hearts and wanting to heal the damage from the past two world wars.
The language of this generation - was the music of pure genius by design, this would change the world.
It would instill a template for all the generations to follow.
Music has this affect on the young, to inspire, to question, to be themselves. To fight for what to believe in and what is the truth.
As leaders came in to power, these wise men and women stood up for change, they were also taken out of play just as quick.
The sixties was a volatile time, full of sorrow. The more we opened up and saw, the more we escaped into a world of love and color.
At this time there was a great mind and heart expansion happening too.
Drugs of all kinds were readily available to dive into another place and time. Escaping the pain and suffering that was all around us.
This was going on in the outside world and in my little world,
I witnessed pain and suffering from my parents generation, as they trying to forget the past ... through picket fences in the suburbs and cocktail parties every weekend.
Creating a microclimate of false protection and far from harmony.
It was some sort of coping with what they had experienced growing up post war.
They were the Fallout Generation and carried this in their DNA.
As, the 1970's rolled around more change, we moved to the inner city, big homes filled with kids, we were a small family of 4 kids, average was 8-10 kids per house.
On our street we had plenty of kids to play with.
Then the big world came to our street ... the FLQ October crisis 1970, we lived on a street in downtown Ottawa, with Members of Parliament and Senators next door, so the Army and Tanks and big guns arrived.
We thought it was cool, not really understanding, what it was all about. It was a very traumatic event in Canadian History. Our innocence of a wholesome land was shattered by horror and murder.
The following spring, another trauma occurred, my parents separated. After all the fighting, it was a bit of a relief.
I was learning and observing and coping with all of this unsettling information.
Luckily, my Grandparents were around, my mother's Mother was a healer and psychic. She recognized something in me and gave me her stone medicine collection to get me interested in the connection to the healing properties of the stones.
She would influence my life many years later, as I modeled how she lived and taught people how to enrich their lives through movement and art, health and wellbeing.
My father's parents, were also big influences, my Grandfather had show horses. I quickly connected with these beautiful animals in a spiritual sense.
Learned to listen to them, communicate with them, by watching him interact and talk with them. I had many teachers and mentors, of course not really knowing at the time, but was able to piece it all together later, understanding the knowledge that they were passing on to me was sacred and would awaken in me when the time was right.
We were fortunate that my Grandfather had purchased an island on a beautiful lake in Quebec, just outside of Ottawa, Hull region. The Algonquin Nation previously occupied this land.
It was a special place and would be the touchstone or constant in my young life to my adult life.
This is the place that I would awaken this gift of being connected to all of nature, Mother Earth and all her creatures.
Knowing at a young age that I felt the pulse or heartbeat of the Earth and all the creatures that live here.
Truthfully, I felt different and mostly misunderstood.
I would soon discover that the landscapes, and the spirits of sacred places that I would visit would begin to communicate with me and yes, awaken this inner knowing.
With all of the chaos in the family, there were moments of clarity. My parents brought us skiing every weekend to Camp Fortune in the Gatineau Hills.
Where, I became very focused on my physical expression of downhill skiing, it was a passion, and I channeled all my energy into it, going fast, than faster.
Where, I would excel and feel this sense of freedom like no other.
I also, stayed involved in horses for several years, as my father bought a farm, where I would further my connection to the land and animals and all that was involved in working a farm.
It was a great experience to be on the farm learning the fragility and beauty of life in balance. And, to feel the connection of the land and everything that lived from it.
I had experienced many aspects of life in these formative years, now I could put much of what I had learned to practice as I was coming of age.
I did experience and witness a lot of trauma in my family. I don't remember all the details, but my body has recorded much of what happened.
For an example, one day my father loaded us all up on the tractor for an adventure.
It was early spring and the fields were muddy and wet, my youngest sister was in the front loader and the rest of my siblings and I were scattered in different spots on the tractor.
All of a sudden there was a loud bang at the front of the tractor. My sister had fallen out of the loader and she was run over by the tractor. I thought she was dead, I flew 10 ft. in the air from the back of the tractor and picked her up from the mud and began running for the house. This was the Nervous system reaction of survival, run, run. You are not safe.
She was ok, she sunk into the muddy soil, she was 5 and I was 14. This was one of many scary events that happened to us.
There was definitely, Post-Traumatic stress affecting my Nervous System from early on, as it was passed down in the DNA of my Parents, Grandparents and generations before them as well.
Dangerous and daring deeds ... the need for speed and chancing the odds.
It was hard wired into my being. I was not afraid to go fast. Putting everything on the line for a feeling of losing control and than somehow pulling it back to barely in control.
Wow! What a fantastic feeling, lots of adrenaline pumping through my veins to get me from the top to bottom. Beating the fastest time to beat.
This type of activity requires some sort of blind faith.
Knowing that you are protected and excepting of the possible consequences too.
All of the sports I loved involved speed and skill.
Skiing fast became my drug.
I had a gift in this sport. I kept fine tuning it.
I competed in ski racing. I let go of all the others sports and began to fixate on the speed.
It was all I wanted to do. I would skip school and go skiing.
It was practical and compact I could go anywhere with this sport.
I started to work in the local ski shops to get equipment. I saw this as my ticket to anywhere. But I had to finish High School first. So, how could I expedite this?
I would find a way to fulfill my passion for skiing and escape the chaos and pain.
CHAPTER 2Full Connection to Disconnection
As, I was approaching eighteen, almost finished high school, I had my first out of body experience.
It seemed like a dream, but I was awake and flying around my room able to view my body as a shell. I did go somewhere, but returned back to my room, I was fearful that I might not come back to this body. This was extraordinary and unique, so I thought. Many of us have had this out of body experience, but discount it as a dream or a one of ... that never happens again. This is connection to something from the past. Something, very familiar, before we are born, our spirit soars so high through the sky. Waiting to be born again to experience this life as a human.
I was ready to begin this awakening as part of my journey ...
The very next week I was off to England to study at a University North of London as a credit course for my final year of high school. I was away for 4 months.
This was a solo journey that would change me forever.
When I arrived, it was very familiar. I recognized places and some people too.
My creative self stepped forward to open the door to another piece of me that I was unaware that was even there. The poetry poured out of me.
As, I travelled up country to an old part of England to visit some of Brittan's literary greats, final resting places. I encountered many spirits, ghosts and apparitions too.
They were everywhere I looked.
So, I began to drink more Guinness beer. Not really letting on what I had witnessed, no one would believe me.
Then I remembered, that I had experienced something like this when I was young, going to Camp in Algonquin Park, Ontario.
It was Native Spirits in the trees, bad ones, Fireballs.
No one else saw them but me.
I was connected to the Spirit world ...
I had not forgotten how to see, the spirits are there all the time. I was sensitive to this energy. Picking up on this would help me navigate my journey many times in my life.
As, I learned of my gifts, I kept them hidden and secretly locked away deep inside of my heart and soul.
Sometimes, revealing them through creative aspects, painting or dance. And channeled this energy into ski racing, my outlet, my soul speaking to the world.
I noticed, that as I grew older, so did the frustrating; the anger was building and not being channeled for the best possible outcome. I was short with everyone.
I had lots of groups of friends, but I moved around not really belonging anywhere, feeling freedom to roam in and out of this social reform, this suited my butterfly personality.
At Eighteen, I meet my first husband at a friend's end of year ski party and saw into the future, the knowing was so clear.
I told him that we would have children together. This knowing scared him into disappearing, for several years.
I disappeared too, out West to the Mountains, to fulfill my passion for skiing and connecting to the mountain energy.
I went to Banff, Alberta to fulfill this desire to be skiing everyday in the mountains, to feel that closeness to The Creator.
Where I felt safe and protected, I belonged somewhere.
Escaping the low vibration and be above it all.
And, I would come to Whistler on tour of the West with my ski Team.
Upon, arriving it felt like home, not wanting to leave this breathe taking place.
Knowing, that someday I would return here, gave me a sense of calm.
So, after 3 years of being away from home, skiing out west, I would return to support my mother.
She experienced a tragic trauma and loss of her boyfriend through a drowning.
I held her up, some how trying to heal the pain that she felt.
We went to university together to heal, replace the pain and gather knowledge.
I studies Mass Communications and Film at Carleton University in Ottawa. Than discovered the radio station at the university and connected my voice and creative expression with this outlet.
I had my own Motown show on CKCU 93.1 I really enjoyed this and found the other studies overwhelming.
But stayed to complete almost 2 years of study.
Than, a chance meeting, after my return from the mountains, four years later ... I reconnected with the boy I had met at that ski party.
We became great friends and travelling partners seeing many exotic places over the years before children. We travelled to Greece, Italy, Australia, and many more places around the globe.
I worked in Real Estate for a few years and than worked in the High end Jewelry business for years, before we decided to have children.
This human experience would soon reveal that there is work to do and through relationship I would learn hard and fast on heartbreak, overwhelm and what co-dependency looked like.
We had both experienced trauma and dealt with it differently.
Mine would be outwardly and his was inwardly.
We married in 1988, I gave birth to our first son, (1990) and this was a very happy time.
I was in my glory with a beautiful happy healthy child, going through the motions of my patterning from my child hood.
I had a template similar to my parents.
Fairly, good coping skills socially and with family.
But, suffered in silence as I began to notice that my husband was not doing as well with the pressure of life, family and responsibilities.
The wheels of the cart began to get wobbly and break down. The cart was about to explode.
The frustration started to mount and create a distancing within the partnership.
As, I was trying to hold it all together with band- aids. It really takes two to make it work or not work.
Sometimes, we cling to something that no longer serves us for our best and highest goodness.
This was one of those times. Out of fear, I was clinging to this relationship, knowing deep down this would become destructive for both of us.
And then, my second son was born (1992). I had two beautiful healthy boys.
It kept the obvious from happening for another year.
This was a very hard and difficult emotional time in my life. I felt very alone and sad.
I blamed myself and saw this as a huge failure.
But, once the shock of it wears off, you start to see the truth.
Making the decision to leave lifted a great weight of my shoulders.
I was not responsible for someone else's healing.
And I could let go of trying to fix someone else.
For the first time, I recognized my own strength and walked away with confidence in my actions.
Knowing that this was the right thing to do.
As, I let go I knew that I had to do this for my boys as much as I needed to do it for myself.
To stop the patterning and programming from continuing on through to the next generation.
CHAPTER 3Fresh Start in The Gatineau Hills
The boys and I would start a new life in the Gatineau Hills. Close to the ski hills and nature. I had friends and a support system in place.
I taught the boys how to ski and they loved it. They were 1 and 3 years old at the time.
We would ski almost every weekend and every night, they had night skiing at Camp Fortune.
I transitioned into being a single parent with small children. I would then start my spiritual awakening, away from trying to fix someone else.
The focus would shift me, into supporting my children the best way I could.
There would be lots of learning and growing in this period, (1994-1998) four years of letting go and becoming self sufficient.
Self-reliant, stronger and more empowered with the direction that my life would take, to assist in also guiding my two sons in the right direction for them to connect to their intended life paths.
This is where the soul starts to activate the memories and gifts, knowing what path to take.
Usually, when you are up against the wall, so to speak.
Life intensifies the need to use your instincts of survival.
Listening to the guidance of our own being and wisdom within. What is truly for our best and highest good will appear and reinforce the true path of existence.
During, this expansive spiritual growth period, I would start to connect with my power and creative gifts and see more through my intuition (Third Eye Chakra).
I would have more awakenings and visions, as this time frame was a portal of Universal energy and knowledge that was coming through to a few light beings that could handle this frequency.
I began to see my path more clearly.
I had experience with the jeweler business and decided to delve more into to the Holistic side of the jewellery business.
I started a small company to support my family with the Native Inspired Gemstone Jeweler creations with healing properties.
Moonstone Jewellery would uncover the stories and legends of many aboriginal cultures.
Including my own heritage. As, I would make and create the jewellery at night as my boys slept.
Most of these neckpieces were made from natural gemstones that had unique healing properties to heal people on a very slow vibration.
My Grandmother had passed the stone medicine on to me to share.
So, I knew what most of the gems were used for intuitively, and would channel the sequence and combine the stones, which had a specific vibration or frequency for healing the bearer of theses items.
Each piece had a name and story with it, to increase its potentency and vibration.
This jewellery line was well received by Museums and Galleries across Canada and people from all over the world purchased these one of a kind pieces. Some people would recognize the name or frequency in each piece as the key to their healing journey.
This is how I supported my boys and I for four years.
Lots of sleepless nights and having to travel to get the purchase orders took a toll on my energy level and my physical wellbeing.
I suspected that on a sub-conscious level, I was preparing for a huge shift.
My being felt the rumblings of something big was going to take place soon.
And there would be no going back to the way things use to be ...
(Continues...)
Excerpted from Finding the Shaman by Debra Lee Hillary. Copyright © 2016 Debra Lee Hillary. Excerpted by permission of Balboa Press.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.
Table of Contents
Contents
Foreword, ix,Preface, xi,
Chapter 1 * In the Beginning-Training Ground, 1,
Chapter 2 * Full Connection to Disconnection, 7,
Chapter 3 * Fresh Start in the Gatineau Hills, 13,
Chapter 4 * Relocation to the West (Returning Home), 17,
Chapter 5 * Teachers Appear, 23,
Chapter 6 * Meeting My Life mate, 30,
Chapter 7 * Balancing Act, 40,
Chapter 8 * Wide Awake, 47,
Chapter 9 * Wisdom Teachings, 52,
Chapter 10 * With Much Gratitude, 56,
About the Author,