fathermothergod: My Journey Out of Christian Science

by Lucia Greenhouse

Overview

“A courageous and finely crafted portrait of a young woman struggling with her family, her faith, and that awkward space between being a child and growing into adulthood.”—Star Tribune (Minneapolis)

“Unimaginable . . . As much an indictment of Christian Science as it is a memoir of her family’s experience of loss.”—O: the Oprah Magazine
 
Lucia Ewing had what looked like an all-American childhood, but when it came to accidents and illnesses, her parents didn’t take their kids to the doctor’s office—they prayed and called a Christian Science practitioner. As a teenager, her visit to an ophthalmologist created a family crisis, and she was a sophomore in college before she had her first annual physical. In December 1985, when Lucia and her siblings, by then young adults, discovered that their mother was sick, they came face-to-face with the reality that they had few—if any—options to save her. Powerless as their mother suffered, they were grief-stricken, angry, and confused. 
 
In this haunting, beautifully written book, Lucia pulls back the curtain on the Christian Science faith and chronicles its complicated legacy for her family. At once an essentially American coming-of-age story and a glimpse into the practices of a religion few really understand, fathermothergod is an unflinching exploration of personal loss and the boundaries of family and faith.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9780307720931
Publisher:	Crown Publishing Group
Publication date:	08/28/2012
Pages:	320
Product dimensions:	5.34(w) x 7.80(h) x 0.73(d)

About the Author

LUCIA GREENHOUSE, a graduate of the Emma Willard School and Brown University, lives with her husband and four children in Westchester County, New York. This is her first book.

Reading Group Guide

Please consider the below discussion questions to enhance your reading of fathermothergod by Lucia Greenhouse.

Readers' Guide for fathermothergod

1. How successful would you say the author was in conveying the doctrine of the Christian Science Church, (starting from the point of view of a child)?
 
2. As a young girl Lucia thinks about the dichotomy between Christian Science and the real world as being like the Venn diagrams in math class, wondering if the two circles overlap at all.  Does this metaphor apply to your own religion or that of others?,Does it apply to other conflicting aspects of a child’s life?
 
3. What were Lucia’s parents’ motivations in embracing Christian Science? Lucia’s grandfather and uncle were prominent physicians.  What are possible explainations for her mother’s rejection of medicine?
 
4. Is there a time in your own life when you’ve had to make an extremely difficult choice between adhering to your own beliefs and respecting those of close friends or family members? How have you dealt with that conflict?
 
5. The Christian Science church has often been viewedas a more or less mainstream--if small-- Protestant religion. What was your understanding of the church, and how has that understanding changed?
 
6. Freedom of religion is a fundamental principal of American democracy.  Are there limits to the free exercise of religion? Should there be?
 
7. Lucia and her siblings had been raised in the Church, and indoctrinated from a young age.  Even though they never fully embraced Christian Science, its grip on them remained tight, even paralyzing. But the same cannot be said about some  of Lucia’s other family members who remained silent after they learned about Joanne’s illness.  What kept them from acting?  Filial loyalty?  Religious tolerance? Fear?
 
8. What would you have done, had you been in Lucia’s shoes? 
 
9. Where should the line between personal choice and legal interest be drawn  (like assisted suicide) ?
 
10.At one point Lucia says that her grandmother may be the only person capable of forgiving her father, and only because her own faith dictates it.  What role has forgiveness played in Lucia’s life and that of her family since the events of 1986?
 
11. Do you think Lucia loves her parents?
 
12.What is the lowest point in the story?           
 
13. Regardless of one’s feelings about Mary Baker Eddy’s theology, she was an early feminist, who founded a religion and started The Christian Science Monitor..  What will her legacy be? 
 
14. What do you think attracts people to Christian Science?
 
15. What is the difference between a religion and a cult?
 
16. Lucia’s sister, Olivia, said to Lucia near the end of the book, “I just want you to know, you, Sherman and I: we had three very different sets of parents.  Your story is not mine.”  Is Olivia’s comment a universal truth?
 
17. Sibling dynamics around family secrets are always complicated.  How is what happened in fathermothergod similar or dissimilar to the way families handle other secrets, such as alcoholism and other addictions? 
 
18. Which character in fathermothergod do you most identify with and why?
 
For more information visit, LuciaGreenhouse.com, facebook.com/LuciaGreenhouse and twitter.com/LuciaGreenhouse.

Editorial Reviews

Moving . . . I am blessed to have read it.” —Andrew Cohen, The Atlantic
 
“fathermothergod is a heart-wrenching coming of age memoir about the implosion of a family when Christian Science dogma encounters a mother's grave illness. It's impossible to read this and not put yourself in the author's shoes—this will take your breath away.”—Lee Woodruff, author of Perfectly Imperfect and In an Instant

“A riveting and heart-rending memoir, fathermothergod: My Journey Out of Christian Science exposes the monstrous feats of neglect fostered by this strange American manifestation of religious fanaticism. Tracing her mother’s decline and its lacerating consequences, Lucia Greenhouse knows the truth about Christian Science, and she tells it with passionate, righteous indignation.”—Caroline Fraser, author of God’s Perfect Child:  Living and Dying in the Christian Science Church

“Lucia Greenhouse's book is a heart-breaking reminder of how nefarious religious zealotry can be. Her story drew me in and blew me away. This is an important addition to the genre of memoirs by children who escaped religious hucksterism and are now bravely exposing it.”—Julia Scheeres, author of Jesus Land

“[A] powerfully affecting memoir . . . Greenhouse’s skill in rendering family relationships under the intersecting stresses of illness and conflicting beliefs make the book worthwhile . . . reading. Wrenchingly courageous.”—Kirkus Reviews

“Through this memoir, readers will see how even those closest to us can remain a mystery.”—Library Journal

“A touching book that puts a human face on Christian Science.”—Booklist

“Rather than a journey out of a faith, this is the story of one woman’s questioning and anguish over her parents’ choices. . . . Teens wondering about their own faith, their parents’ expectations, and how to marry the two will find that this book resonates with them. It will also appeal to anyone wanting to know what it’s like to grow up in Christian Science. . . . Suggest that readers have tissues close at hand.”—School Library Journal
 
“[ fathermothergod] resonates with anyone wanting to understand another’s beliefs, or trying to understand his or her own.”—Las Vegas Review-Journal

“fathermothergod tells a uniquely complex tale of a family torn apart, disastrously so, by a startlingly dangerous faith. . . . A captivating, heartbreaking work that will leave readers wondering what else they don’t know about the hidden pockets of the faithful world.”—Twin Cities Daily Planet

From the Publisher

One afternoon just before she turns eight, Greenhouse returns home from school to find her older sister, Olivia, curled up asleep on the couch, covered with little red spots. Lucia anxiously asks her mother if Olivia has the chicken pox. Her mother stiffly replies that Olivia is not sick, because Olivia is God's perfect child. In this one moment, her family's deeply seated beliefs in Christian Science become crystal clear to little Lucia, and she wrestles mightily with these teachings in the pages of this often gripping, sometimes melodramatic memoir. Greenhouse's struggles come to a head when her mother falls gravely ill with cancer; in the early stages of her illness, Greenhouse's parents seek the aid of Christian Science healers. As her mother's health deteriorates rapidly, she is moved to a hospital for treatment, but this move is too little, too late. Greenhouse very weakly tries to resolve the tension between her own beliefs and the Christian Science teachings that she never embraced, and she never works out the anger and resentment she has toward her father for what she believes are his misguided and unloving actions toward her mother. (Aug.)

Publishers Weekly

In her memoir, Greenhouse writes of being the child of parents who practiced Christian Science and her eventual falling away—she herself was never a member of the church. In recounting growing up in this household, she writes in the first-person present, so readers feel her confusion over the church doctrine that considers sickness and even death as "error." Her father's faith was strong enough that he becomes a Christian Science practitioner who treated other Christian Scientists through prayer. Greenhouse and her brother, not sharing the faith (an older sister did) rebelled in various ways. Despite their disagreements with their parents, the siblings agreed not to tell their extended family when their mother fell seriously ill. Greenhouse's mother finally agreed to be taken to a hospital, where she rallied for a short while before dying. Her death created rifts in the family, some that never fully healed. VERDICT Through this memoir, readers will see how even those closest to us can remain a mystery. Greenhouse's book is unlikely to be read by many practicing Christian Scientists. Those curious about the faith and those interested in stories of life's challenges, though, may find this a gratifying read. [See Prepub Alert, 2/7/11.]—Eric Norton, McMillan Memorial Lib., Wisconsin Rapids

Library Journal

In this powerfully affecting memoir, ex–Christian Scientist Greenhouse tells the story of how her parents' fervent adherence to their religion tore the family irrevocably apart.

From the outside, the author's comfortable Minnesota childhood seemed perfect. She and her two siblings grew up going to the best schools surrounded by a host of loving relatives. Unlike the other members of their extended family, however, the Ewingclan was different. They were Christian Scientists who did not believe in taking medicines of any kind, including aspirin. From an early age, the author was all too aware "of the difference between the way my family does things and the way other people do [them]," and of the irony that her mother was a doctor's daughter. Over time, her parents' beliefs deepened. Soon after the author's 13th birthday, the family moved to London so her father could become a Christian Science practitioner (or faith healer) and her mother a Christian Science nurse. Four years later, they returned to New Jersey where they found a home near a Christian Science care facility. Greenhouse became more openly rebellious, expressing her defiance by buying a pair of much-needed eyeglasses. When her mother became sick with a mysterious illness—a "little problem" later identified as cancer—underlying family tensions came to an explosive head. Both parents vehemently denied her mother's rapidly deteriorating condition. For nine horrific months, the author stood helplessly by as her mother fought her disease armed only with the belief that all illness was error. With its meditations on the many whys of this event, the narrative reads like a personal exorcism, but Greenhouse's skill in rendering family relationships under the intersecting stresses of illness and conflicting beliefs make the book worthwhile—but difficult—reading.

Wrenchingly courageous.

Kirkus Reviews