Publishers Weekly
12/11/2023
According to this canny debut guide, today’s singles are hampered by beliefs that have become outdated in a technological age marked by increased choice, an expanded dating pool, and impersonal, round-the-clock communication. Among other myths, dating coach Hoffman debunks the idea that one must rely on an elusive “spark” for connection (readers should instead work on improving communication on- and offline), the tendency to seek a laundry list of ideal qualities in a potential match (it’s smarter to prioritize three must-haves and one dealbreaker), and the hope for one true soulmate, which “prevents us from moving into a fulfilling, committed relationship.” Offering plenty of useful nuts-and-bolts advice (including 10 “texting commandments” and tips for virtual dates), Hoffman strikes a tone that’s sympathetic but not patronizing. She reassures readers that “even if it feels like you’ll never meet your person, statistically speaking you probably will,” though it might “take a little longer than it took your parents or grandparents and your partnership may look different than theirs.” Those who’ve grown sick of aimlessly swiping will find hope. Agent: Joanna Volpe, New Leaf Literary. (Jan.)
From the Publisher
Damona Hoffman is an absolute genius because she makes us realize how to help ourselves not stay stuck and gets us on a path to understanding ourselves better. And when we clear the cobwebs of one-sided expectations and societal myths, she helps us get the clarity to move forward in a reality that is beautifully tailored for ourselves. It is a pragmatic and self-respecting place of hope with an actual road map.”
—Drew Barrymore
“Hoffman’s practical advice will serve as a balm for the occasionally soul-crushing or maddening experience that is dating."—Shondaland
“As a therapist deeply invested in human relationships, I loved reading F the Fairy Tale. Hoffman shakes up conventional narratives and invites readers to take control of their love stories with relatable anecdotes, wise insights, and actionable tools to help anyone looking for authentic connection navigate the modern dating landscape.”
—Lori Gottlieb, New York Times-bestselling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone and co-host of the Dear Therapists podcast
“Hoffman’s F the Fairy Tale is the cold shower and cup of warm tea every single needs in today’s toxic swipe culture. Not just a no-BS approach to love and dating, but also a manual that deserves a spot on every therapist’s bookshelf, to maneuver through the process and make smart decisions to set you up for a relationship with legs.”
—John Kim (The Angry Therapist), author of Single On Purpose
“If you’re serious about finding love, this is the book for you! Drawing on her deep expertise in the world of online dating and written with her signature wit and candor, Hoffman provides a clear and concise guide to modern dating.” —Logan Ury, author of How to Not Die Alone and director of relationship science at Hinge
“In the 1980s when I began broadcasting the radio program Loveline, my goal was to help people navigate the complex biological reality of sex and relationships. Today, people confront some of the same persistent myths, as well as many new social, cultural, and interpersonal shifts that have made the romantic landscape far more complex. In a very intelligent and readable book, Damona Hoffman outlines these challenges as well as the pillars for establishing healthy connection. Based on years of her experience working with singles, this book is the compendium of what she has learned through helping people in a real-world context. Entertaining, smart, and fun; the reader will find something here that speaks to them and enhances their dating lives.” —Dr. Drew Pinsky
“Offering plenty of useful nuts-and-bolts advice… Hoffman strikes a tone that’s sympathetic but not patronizing… Those who’ve grown sick of aimlessly swiping will find hope.” —Publishers Weekly