03/01/2022
The title of Jagger's second memoir (after Unbound: A Story of Snow and Self-Discovery) says it all—the author and her mother, who has dementia, go on the camping trip of a lifetime through the Rocky Mountains, starting in Montana. Jagger reflects on the meaning of memory—her mother's memory, and the author's memories of her mother—through the lens of the camping trip: the roads they traversed and the lush flora and fauna of the Rocky Mountain landscapes. As the trip and the memoir progress, Jagger opens up to her mother (and readers) and unravels deeper memories and family secrets and decides to confront them head-on, before it is too late. Readers will enjoy this elegantly written memoir of a mother and daughter's trip through beautiful terrain, with moments of heartwarming bonding; relatives of people with dementia or memory loss will be particularly touched. VERDICT This grounded, readable, and gracefully written memoir is an interesting take on the road trip genre, particularly relatable to people affected by dementia.—Kelly Karst
★ 2022-01-13
A memoir of Alzheimer’s and a mother and daughter’s journey across the Rockies and beyond.
In this follow-up to Unbound, Jagger chronicles the difficulties of coping with her mother’s Alzheimer’s, with which she was diagnosed in 2015. Growing up, her family members didn’t discuss their feelings. By the time Jagger was a teenager, she writes, “I developed a deep suspicion of emotions….I judged people who displayed them.” The author also contends that her parents treated her and her sister differently than her brothers. “I was handed the idea that my fulfillment, my eventual wholeness, was dependent on finding a nice guy,” she writes. As an adult, Jagger distanced herself from her mother, and for years, they moved in different directions. As a result, “I’d never really seen my mother…in her totality.” Following her mother’s diagnosis, Jagger decided that a trip could help their relationship. “This was not the first time I had run to Mother Nature looking for guidance,” she writes. With keen insight and thoughtful prose that captures both the emotions involved and the significance of the natural world in the author’s life, she recalls their journey across the Rockies, where they shared moments of loss, endured times of frustration, and found genuine joy in nature. Jagger also shares intimate details of the memories that began to surface as well as her reoccurring dreams, which allowed her to begin to make connections between her mother’s life and her own. During the process of trying to learn more about her mother, she realized that “this trip was never about unearthing the mystery living inside my mother, but the one that has been living deep inside of me.” Solemnly, the author acknowledges that, as her mother begins to forget her, she will be allowed to reclaim herself. “My focus shifted away from the loss,” she writes. “It felt, now, that there was much to be gained.”
A beautiful yet heart-wrenching tribute to the mother-daughter relationship.
Praise for Everything Left to Remember
"Jagger offers a beautiful reflection on love, memory, and inheritance in this heartrending account of a road trip she took through Big Sky Country.... This will cast a spell on fans of Cheryl Strayed and Glennon Doyle." —Publishers Weekly
"With keen insight and thoughtful prose that captures both the emotions involved and the significance of the natural world in the author’s life, she recalls their journey across the Rockies, where they shared moments of loss, endured times of frustration, and found genuine joy in nature.... A beautiful yet heart-wrenching tribute to the mother-daughter relationship." —Kirkus, starred review
“In this thoughtful and intimate memoir of a mother and daughter on a road trip, many destinations are reached - what it is to have Alzheimer’s, what it is to love someone with Alzheimer’s and who really is in the navigator’s seat. Wonderful addition to the genre.” —Gayatri Devi, author of The Spectrum of Hope: An Optimistic and New Approach to Alzheimer’s Disease and Other Dementias
"This book infuses a devastating topic with a generosity of spirit that makes the pages within it soar. It is a life-changing read that connects us to the greater truth that none of us are ever truly alone. A tribute to love and family and what it means to be human in this fleeting journey called life. Simply put, this book is exquisite, a classic of our time, a must-read if we are ever going to save the natural world and ourselves within it."
—Linda Sivertsen, host of the Beautiful Writers Podcast & author of Generation Green and Beautiful Writers
"Both soaring and intimate, this spellbinding book maps a daughter's journey into the wilds of herself. Using her mother— who is slowly forgetting herself through Alzheimer’s— as a codex, Jagger reconnects with the unspoken histories of her body and lineage, and somehow finds the language to share her journey with us. If you let it, Everything Left to Remember will unmake you… and then help you rediscover your path home."
—Maia Toll, award-winning author of the Wild Wisdom series
“Steph Jagger’s Everything Left to Remember deftly grips both sweetness and rage, recognition and refusal. Jagger treads cultural oceans, the performance of childhood, cinders of inheritance, and how much of who we are is in what we cannot let go. Everything Left to Remember is a reminder that what we commit to forgetting, we also commit to memory.” —E. J. Koh, award-winning author of The Magical Language of Others and A Lesser Love
“This memoir is a gift. Steph Jagger writes with a combination of crisp humour, grace, and clarity that takes my breath away. This book shows us how to accept the steady parenting of Mother Nature, and how to open our heart to her love and magic — even when we are facing the impossible.”—Sarah Selecky, award-winning author of Radiant Shimmering Light
Everything Left To Remember left me breathless in many moments — suspended in between pages because the feelings, inner experiences, and emotion captured through Steph’s narrative were so viscerally felt within me. Steph has captured the complexity, grief, and beauty of mother-daughter relationships, as well as the depth from which they are born, in such a way that will leave readers captivated, reflective, and ready to step more fully into their own relationships, lives, and selves. This memoir holds within it a balance of tenderness and humor, grit and grace, mystery and meaning, all weaving together to create a story that I believe all of us can somehow find ourselves in. Everything Left To Remember showcases the brilliance and magic of Steph’s writing, all while generously sharing such an intimate and powerful adventure of how both connection and loss can allow us to see others, ourselves, and the natural world more clearly. I’ll be reflecting on it for a long time to come.
—Lisa Olivera, author of Already Enough
I loved Steph’s first book, Unbound, so I knew I’d devour Everything Left To Remember. What I didn’t foresee was the spectacular growth she’s undergone as a writer between her first and second memoirs. Writing into the intersection of love, motherhood, and dementia takes bravery, strength, and insight — all of which Jagger exhibits in Everything Left To Remember. It is raw, honest, and beautifully crafted. The text glistens with truth, humor, and honesty, making each page feel like an embrace from a friend. Everything Left To Remember is the heart-guidebook our generation needs to navigate dementia. Jagger’s intuition, wisdom, and wit make her a leading voice of our generation. If you have a mother, read this book.
—Charlotte Austin, award-winning travel journalist
Flowing with poetic prose, Jagger’s gorgeous depiction of memory, motherhood, and what it means to love and lose the people we care about the most will leave you feeling tender and wondrous. This gift of a book is about what it means to be real and to be human.
—Claire Bidwell Smith, author of The Rules of Inheritance
Steph Jagger takes us on a heartbreakingly beautiful mother-daughter journey that will inspire reflection, remembrance, and our own courage to take the journey home to Mother.
—Kylie McBeath, Host of Zura Health Podcast
Narrator Andi Arndt brings this heartrending yet inspiring memoir to life. When Steph Jagger’s mother, Shelia, is diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, Jagger plans a camping trip through three national parks, a last opportunity to connect and uncover her mother’s stories. As Steph, Arndt’s voice is filled with love, patience, and moments of frustration as Shelia repeats questions over and over, trying to make sense of who she is, where she is, and who her traveling companion is. Arndt also lets us hear Shelia’s mixed moments of lucidity, confusion, and frustration as the journey progresses. Nature gives her time and space to recall and share stories long buried. This audiobook is a touching testament to the power of stories, nature, and love to sustain and connect us. N.E.M. © AudioFile 2022, Portland, Maine
Narrator Andi Arndt brings this heartrending yet inspiring memoir to life. When Steph Jagger’s mother, Shelia, is diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, Jagger plans a camping trip through three national parks, a last opportunity to connect and uncover her mother’s stories. As Steph, Arndt’s voice is filled with love, patience, and moments of frustration as Shelia repeats questions over and over, trying to make sense of who she is, where she is, and who her traveling companion is. Arndt also lets us hear Shelia’s mixed moments of lucidity, confusion, and frustration as the journey progresses. Nature gives her time and space to recall and share stories long buried. This audiobook is a touching testament to the power of stories, nature, and love to sustain and connect us. N.E.M. © AudioFile 2022, Portland, Maine
