The Council of Dads: A Story of Family, Friendship & Learning How to Live

by Bruce Feiler

Overview

Facing his own mortality, bestselling author Bruce Feiler decided to ask six men — a COUNCIL OF DADS — to play various roles in his daughters’s lives, representing the different aspects of their father that they knew best. Here is the moving story of Feiler’s illness and recovery — and the men who promised to be him.

When bestselling author Bruce Feiler was diagnosed with a malignant tumor in his leg, he could only imagine all the walks he might not take with his daughters, the ballet recitals he would miss, the art projects left undone, and the aisles he might not walk down. Though his daughters would have plenty of resources in their lives, they wouldn’t have their Dad. He decided to write to six men who had been with him throughout his life- men who could become his voice and his daughters’ Council of Dads.

“Will you listen in on them?” he wrote. “Will you take them out to lunch every now and then? Will you go to a soccer game if you’re in town? When they get older, will you indulge them in a new pair of shoes? As time passes, will you invite them to a family gathering on occasion. Will you introduce them to somebody who might help one of their dreams come true?”

THE COUNCIL OF DADS is the intimate story of Feiler’s illness but it is also about the people who touched and shaped his life, and what it means to be truly known. But this is not just a document of one life that has been to the edge — rather it is a blueprint for how others can take Feiler’s experience and deepen their relationships with their own friends and leave behind a treasured legacy for their children.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9780062993908
Publisher:	HarperCollins
Publication date:	03/10/2020
Edition description:	Reprint
Pages:	272
Sales rank:	1,143,476
Product dimensions:	7.80(w) x 5.20(h) x 0.80(d)

About the Author

Bruce Feiler is the author of six consecutive New York Times bestsellers, including Abraham, Where God Was Born, America's Prophet, The Council of Dads, and The Secrets of Happy Families. He is a columnist for the New York Times, a popular lecturer, and a frequent commentator on radio and television. He lives in Brooklyn with his wife and twin daughters.

Hometown:

New York, New York

Date of Birth:

October 25, 1964

Place of Birth:

Savannah, Georgia

Education:

B.A., Yale University, 1987; M.Phil. in international relations, Cambridge University, 1991

Table of Contents

1 The Orange Sting-Ray 1

2 The Council of Dads 9

3 Twenty Fingers and Twenty Toes 14

4 Chronicles of the Lost Year: Volume I 24

5 Jeff: Approach the Cow 33

6 Twentieth-Century Two-thirds 45

7 Chronicles of the Lost Year: Volume II 55

8 Max: Pack Your Flip-Flops 64

9 The Lesson of the Dunes 74

10 Chronicles of the Lost Year: Volume III 86

11 David Don't See the Wall 93

12 Use Your Words 103

13 Chronicles of the Lost Year: Volume IV 112

14 Ben: Tend Your Tadpoles 120

15 Be a Collector 132

16 Chronicles of the Lost Year: Volume V 142

17 Ben the Second: Live the Questions 152

18 The Last Few Steps 164

19 Chronicles of the Lost Year: Volume VI 175

20 Joshua Harvest Miracles 186

21 Always Learn to Juggle on the Side of a Hill 196

22 Chronicles of the Lost Year: Volume VII 206

23 Take a Walk with a Turtle 217

24 Hug the Monster 227

Afterword: The Council Convenes 237

Say Please and Thank You 243

Editorial Reviews

Thoughtful....From other men close to him, Feiler gleaned the qualities of curiosity and the urge to travel and learn, of taking care of things and people that matter, of remembering those who matter and casting them in a positive light.

St. Louis Post-Dispatch

Candid and moving. The Council of Dads exemplifies the mysterious process by which bad news can alter our perspective and reorder our priorities, and it celebrates the ever-expanding level of emotional intimacy that men are increasingly free to engage.

Washington Post

A book that will touch many.

Booklist

Candid and moving. The Council of Dads exemplifies the mysterious process by which bad news can alter our perspective and reorder our priorities, and it celebrates the ever-expanding level of emotional intimacy that men are increasingly free to engage.

Washington Post

…Feiler's conversations with his potential stand-ins are candid and moving. The Council of Dads exemplifies the mysterious process by which bad news can alter our perspective and reorder our priorities, and it celebrates the ever-expanding level of emotional intimacy that men are increasingly free to engage.
—The Washington Post

Michael Lindgren

In 2008, bestselling author Feiler (Walking the Bible) learned he had a rare, life-threatening tumor in his left leg. Fearing what his absence would do to the lives of his young daughters, Feiler asked six close friends ("Men who know my voice") to help raise them. Feiler chronicles his battle with cancer, from diagnosis to recovery, as well as his sentimental but moving journey to recruit friends who can carry out his wish to teach his daughters to travel, dream, and live life to its fullest. Feiler's intimate bond with his friends makes them unusually expressive and communicative (if lacking in humor), and their own biographies lend further inspirational dimensions to the story. Though his letters to friends and family can get ornate ("The Brooklyn Bridge...is looking fresh-faced and handsome overhead, its famed promenade glittering like the pot of gold at the end of a long journey to come"), it's hard not to get swept along and cheer Feiler on as he fights for his life and his daughters'.
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Publishers Weekly

Candid and moving. The Council of Dads exemplifies the mysterious process by which bad news can alter our perspective and reorder our priorities, and it celebrates the ever-expanding level of emotional intimacy that men are increasingly free to engage.” — Washington Post

“Thoughtful....From other men close to him, Feiler gleaned the qualities of curiosity and the urge to travel and learn, of taking care of things and people that matter, of remembering those who matter and casting them in a positive light.” — St. Louis Post-Dispatch

“Reading The Council of Dads made me wonder at the great opportunity we miss....I’d like my daughters to have a Council of Dads, a Council of Moms...to remind us which values we value most, and help us make sure we transmit them.” — Time magazine

“It’s hard not to get swept along and cheer Feiler on as he fights for his life and his daughters.” — Publishers Weekly (starred review)

“Feiler tackles personal hardship with inquisitive and heartfelt eloquence.” — Kirkus Reviews

“A book that will touch many.” — Booklist

“Moving.” — Daily News

“Wonderful.” — Savannah Morning News

“Feiler’s council brings us all closer.” — Sun Herald (Sydney, Australia)

“A thoughtful, candid story of how the humdrum of everyday life can suddenly give way to upheaval, and of coming face to face with mortality....A triumph.” — The Age (Melbourne, Australia)

From the Publisher

A thoughtful, candid story of how the humdrum of everyday life can suddenly give way to upheaval, and of coming face to face with mortality....A triumph.

The Age (Melbourne

A book that will touch many.

Booklist

Reading The Council of Dads made me wonder at the great opportunity we miss....I’d like my daughters to have a Council of Dads, a Council of Moms...to remind us which values we value most, and help us make sure we transmit them.

Time magazine

Wonderful.

Savannah Morning News

Moving.

Daily News

Feiler’s council brings us all closer.

Sun Herald (Sydney

After being diagnosed with cancer in 2008, Feiler (America's Prophet: Moses and the American Story, 2009, etc.) asked his closest male friends to provide guidance, wisdom and love to his children, should he not survive. The author chronicles the daunting process of enduring a life-threatening condition, creating an amalgam of travelogue, family album, personal memoir and portrait of a marriage. With the same measured, down-to-earth voice that distinguishes his popular explorations of historical landmarks and religious figures, Feiler describes the men in his life who have shaped him, including his father, both grandfathers and the men he chose to fill his fatherly shoes in case his extensive surgery and chemotherapy treatments proved unsuccessful. By reverently marveling at the achievements, sorrows and credos of his male role models, the evolution of his deepest friendships and his wife's courage, the author looks beyond his own lifetime, putting the struggles of the present into a philosophically astute and humble context. Through regular letters to loved ones, he offers snapshots of his "Lost Year," bluntly recounting the ravages of aggressive procedures, the impact of his weakened state on his daily life and the moments of joy, connection and grace he still finds within the anguish. His contemplative candor, fortitude and wry humor come through in the simplest of phrases: "No one aspires to be the person who handles this kind of situation well." Addressing his daughters, the author writes about "the great paradox of parenting: Even as we come to feel we can't live without you, our primary job is to prepare you to live without us. Our task, in a sense, is to make ourselves obsolete."Feiler tackles personal hardship with inquisitive and heartfelt eloquence. Author tour to Atlanta, Chicago, New York, Raleigh-Durham, Savannah, Washington, D.C.

Kirkus Reviews