Conflict 101: A Manager's Guide to Resolving Problems So Everyone Can Get Back to Work

by Susan H. SHEAROUSE

Overview

Learn how conflict is created, how to respond to it, and how to manage it more effectively so that your team can get back to doing what it does best: producing top results for your organization.

From mild disagreements to major personnel blowouts, conflict in the workplace is unavoidable. Conflict 101 employs research, humor, and relatable anecdotes to help readers more deeply understand:

• what it takes to build trust,
• harness negative emotions,
• encourage apologies and forgiveness,
• use a solution-seeking approach,
• and say what needs to be said in the workplace to move past conflicts.

Whether it's a fight over resources, a disagreement about how to get things done, or an argument stemming from perceived differences in identities or values, the manager's role is to navigate relationships, build compromises, and encourage better collaboration.

In doing so, you'll not only become a stronger manager--you'll build a much stronger team.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9780814417119
Publisher:	AMACOM
Publication date:	05/11/2011
Pages:	272
Sales rank:	1,000,815
Product dimensions:	5.90(w) x 8.90(h) x 0.80(d)

About the Author

SUSAN H. SHEAROUSE has served as Executive Director of the National Conference on Peacemaking and Conflict Resolution and on the Advisory Board of the Institute for Conflict Analysis and Resolution at George Mason University. Her clients have included Lockheed Martin, Philip Morris, the IRS, the US Environmental Protection Agency, the US Army Corps of Engineers, and many others.

Read an Excerpt

Overview of the Book

Part I sets the stage for understanding conflict, beginning with this chapter.

Chapter 2, “What Gets in Our Way?” explores what happens when a working relationship has gotten off track—how fear, assumptions a blame, and habits get in the way of resolving conflicts.

Part II, “Understanding the Dynamics of Conflict,” provides an analysis of the dimensions of conflict, which points to the tools to understand differences and avoid needless contention. Chapter 3, “What We

Need: The Satisfaction Triangle,” describes three necessary components of satisfactory solutions. In Chapter 4, “Where We Are: Levels of Conflict,” you will see how resolving conflict at the earliest opportunity is easiest—and strategies for dealing with conflicts that have escalated.

Chapter 5, “How We Respond: Approaches to Conflict,” enables you to gain a clearer understanding of your own approaches to conflict, and the approaches others around you use. From there, you learn strategies for beginning to change those approaches when they are not useful and to deal more effectively with other approaches you encounter at work.

Chapter 6, “Who We Are: Cultural Considerations,” explores cultural differences and the role these differences play in creating and resolving conflict. Chapter 7, “What We Are Arguing About Matters:

Sources of Conflict,” analyzes five sources of conflict in the workplace:

information, interests, structural conflicts, values, and relationships—

with a guide to using that understanding to resolve conflict more effectively.

Part III, “Keys to Resolving Conflict,” introduces five concepts managers can use to create a more positive climate for workplace relationships.

Chapter 8, “Building Trust,” considers behaviors that build or wreck trust and how to rebuild trust that has been broken. Chapter 9,

“Apology and Forgiveness,” addresses the role that apologies and forgiveness play, and provides steps to take to apologize effectively and to move toward forgiveness. Chapter 10, “Rethinking Anger,” explores the physiology of anger, as well as ways to manage your own anger or respond to others’ anger. Chapter 11, “A Sense of Humor,” focuses on the importance of keeping the ups and downs of working relationships in perspective;

and Chapter 12, “Time,” reflects on the importance of time in decision making and the resolution of conflict.

Part IV, “Putting It All Together,” brings together concepts explored in earlier chapters, providing specific conflict-resolution tools and communication skills. Chapter 13, “Reaching Agreement: A Solution-

Seeking Model,” delineates a process for addressing differences, presents a solution-seeking model, and shows how to use it. Chapter 14,

“Listening Is the Place to Start,” focuses on listening skills and explores how managers can listen more effectively. Chapter 15, “Saying What

Needs to Be Said,” gives a guide and some tips for raising concerns and addressing issues so that others are more likely to hear your message.

Chapter 16, “The Challenge of Electronic Communication,” explores how to use electronic communication effectively in addressing workplace conflicts.

Each of the concepts and skills presented here will enable you to resolve conflicts more quickly and effectively, which will have an immediate impact on morale, productivity, and ultimately the bottom line.

Table of Contents

Contents

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

PART I

INTRODUCTION

CHAPTER 1 THE JOY OF CONFLICT

Conflict Defined

Conflict in the Workplace

Drawing from My Own Experience

How We Think About Conflict

Overview of the Book

CHAPTER 2 WHAT GETS IN OUR WAY?

Fear as a Stumbling Block

Blame as a Stumbling Block

Assumptions as Stumbling Blocks

Habits as Stumbling Blocks

PART II

UNDERSTANDING THE

DYNAMICS OF CONFLICT

CHAPTER 3 WHAT WE NEED:

THE SATISFACTION TRIANGLE

Substance Satisfaction

Process Satisfaction

Emotional Satisfation

CHAPTER 4 WHERE WE ARE:

LEVELS OF CONFLICT

The Five Levels of Conflict

Strategies for Each Conflict Level

CHAPTER 5 HOW WE RESPOND:

APPROACHES TO CONFLICT

Avoiding

Accommodating

Directing

Compromising

Collaborating

CHAPTER 6 WHO WE ARE:

CULTURAL CONSIDERATIONS

Culture Defined

Five Dimensions of Cultural Difference

Power and Culture

CHAPTER 7 WHAT WE ARE ARGUING

ABOUT MATTERS: SOURCES OF CONFLICT

Information

Interests

Structural Conflicts

Values

Relationships

PART III

KEYS TO RESOLVING CONFLICT

CHAPTER 8 BUILDING TRUST

Components of Trust

How to Wreck Trust

How to Build Trust

How to Rebuild Trust

CHAPTER 9 APOLOGY AND FORGIVENESS

Apology Offered

Forgiveness Granted

CHAPTER 10 RETHINKING ANGER

The Physiology of Emotions

How to Manage Your Own Anger

How to Respond to Someone Else’s Anger

Anger and Violence in the Workplace

CHAPTER 11 A SENSE OF HUMOR

Keeping Things in Perspective

As Simple as a Smile

Cautions on the Use of Humor

CHAPTER 12 TIME

Patience Is a Virtue

Time to Process Feedback

Time as a Face-Saving Tool

Time to Check It Out

The Right Time

PART IV

PUTTING IT ALL TOGETHER

CHAPTER 13 REACHING AGREEMENT:

A SOLUTION-SEEKING MODEL

A Four-Step Process

Prepare

Discover

Consider

Commit

CHAPTER 14 LISTENING IS THE PLACE TO START

What Keeps Us from Listening?

The Three C’s: Calm. Courage. Curiosity

What Are You Listening For?

The Listener’s Tools

CHAPTER 15 SAYING WHAT NEEDS TO BE SAID

Know Yourself First

Frame the Situation Accurately

Speak to Be Heard

More Powerful Persuasion

What to Avoid When You Are Talking

CHAPTER 16 THE CHALLENGE OF ELECTRONIC

TEXT COMMUNICATION

The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

When Not to Use Electronic Communication

How to Write an E-Mail

A Word About Social Networking

BIBLIOGRAPHY

INDEX