Everyone has issues. Some of us have more than others. Some of us mask our issues with fake smiles, shopping, and makeup. Some of us indulge in not so pleasant, pleasantries, such as drugs, alcohol, social media and the like. Literally the emotional currency to afford. Eventually the nostalgia wears off, and we are left defeated and deflated. Many of us look to others to fill the voice in our painfully, lukewarm existence and in the end, we only end up damaging others. I've been there, lived there, and attempted to love there.
My drug of choice has always been affection. It was the high I'd forever chase and the low I couldn't let go of. I wanted to love each and every person who I came in contact with. Unfortunately, there was a time that I didn't love myself, so how could I expect to love others? These are my confessions...
... CONFESSIONS OF A SERIAL DATER
We all have confessions
And still nothing to say.
Amused and abused
And still taken the wrong way.
In front of you
I can't be myself.
Alone,
I'm too broke,
A complete joke.
They look at me side eyed
And never with full face,
They can't believe
I'm such a disgrace.
A disgrace to my mother,
My family, and friends.
They won't give me a break
And the taunting never ends.
I was only looking for love
And found it in the wrong places.
My vision is cloudy
And I can't make out their faces.
I etched a sketch of you
In the back of my brain,
And there you will stay
Because of the pain.
