Building Love Together in Blended Families: The 5 Love Languages and Becoming Stepfamily Smart

Building Love Together in Blended Families: The 5 Love Languages and Becoming Stepfamily Smart

by Gary Chapman, Ron L Deal
Building Love Together in Blended Families: The 5 Love Languages and Becoming Stepfamily Smart

Building Love Together in Blended Families: The 5 Love Languages and Becoming Stepfamily Smart

by Gary Chapman, Ron L Deal

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Overview

Create a Loving and Safe Environment for Your Blended Family

Blended families face unique challenges, and sadly, good intentions aren’t always enough. With so many complex relationships involved, all the normal rules for family life change, even how you apply something as simple as the five love languages.

That’s why Gary Chapman, the bestselling author of The 5 Love Languages® andnational expert on stepfamilies, Ron Deal, join together in this book to teach you how the five love languages can help your blended family. They’ll teach you:

  • About the unique dynamics of stepfamilies
  • How to overcome fear and trust issues in marriage
  • How to develop healthy parenting and step-parenting practices
  • How the love languages should—and should not—be applied


You’re going to face many challenges, but with the right strategies and smart work, your family can be stronger and healthier together.


Product Details

ISBN-13: 9780802419057
Publisher: Moody Publishers
Publication date: 02/04/2020
Pages: 192
Sales rank: 137,387
Product dimensions: 5.50(w) x 8.50(h) x 0.42(d)

About the Author

GARY CHAPMAN, PhD–author, speaker, counselor–has a passion for people and for helping them form lasting relationships. He is the #1 bestselling author of The 5 Love Languages series® and director of Marriage and Family Life Consultants, Inc. Gary travels the world presenting seminars, and his radio programs air on more than 400 stations. For more information, visit his website at www.5lovelanguages.com.

RON L. DEAL is one of the most widely read and viewed experts on blended families in the country. He is founder of Smart Stepfamilies™, Director of FamilyLife Blended® for Family Life®, the author of numerous videos and books on stepfamily living including the bestselling The Smart Stepfamily, and is consulting editor for the Smart Stepfamily Series of books. Ron is a licensed marriage and family therapist, popular speaker, and host of the podcast FamilyLife Blended. He and his wife, Nan, have three sons and live in Little Rock, Arkansas. Find events and resources at RonDeal.org.

Table of Contents

About the Authors 9

Introduction 11

1 Blending Well, Loving Well 15

2 Understanding the Languages of Love 33

3 When Loves Compete and Conflict 65

4 Building Love Together in Your Marriage 83

5 Building Love Together in Stepparenting 97

6 Building Love Together in Sibling Relationships 117

7 Building Love Together in Grandparenting 133

8 Building Love Together in the Face of Rejection 151

9 Encouragement for the Journey Ahead 169

Epilogue 181

Acknowledgments 183

Notes 185

What People are Saying About This

From the Publisher

Praise for Building Love Together in Blended Families

“In this accessible and game-changing guide, Dr. Gary Chapman and Ron Deal delve into the real issues stepfamilies face but often don't know how to talk about. With a unique approach based on The 5 Love Languages model, they provide a practical and empowering path forward for parents and children alike.”
Lori Gottlieb
New York Times bestselling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone

“The complex emotional challenges often associated with stepfamilies have proven challenging for countless people—and the fallout can be incredibly painful. However, Gary Chapman and Ron Deal have good news: it’s more than possible for blended families to enjoy thriving relationships! Their new book brings together their combined and time-tested wisdom to show you how your own blended family can flourish amidst your “new normal.”  ”
Jim Daly
President, Focus on the Family

 
“What an incredible resource! Nobody but Gary and Ron, two world-class experts, could have written this powerful book. The wisdom they impart is priceless. Every couple in a blended family - and every extended family member connected to them - needs to read this valuable book. It’s engaging, grounded and immeasurably practical.” 
Les and Leslie Parrott
#1 New York Times bestselling authors of Saving Your Marriage before It Starts

“The blended family is a new norm in our culture and world. It involves so many difficult challenges and complexities in the search for ways to promote healthy parenting, love, safety, healing, and structure. Gary Chapman and Ron Deal have written the best book I have read on the subject. They are clear, straightforward, and practical in the steps and skills they provide, especially in how the five love languages apply tothe relationships. Chapter 1 alone is worth the price of the book. Highly recommended.” 
John Townsend
New York Times bestselling author of the Boundaries book series 
Founder, the Townsend Institute for Leadership and Counseling

“I cannot think of a better layer to add to the blended family conversation than the understanding of how each of us view the world. We all have a different lens with which we see the world—our circumstances and situations. We each have our own “language” that is uniquely ours or uniquely theirs. As we begin to understand one another’s language, we can better understand how to recognize and meet each other’s needs. From parents to children. I cannot think of a more dynamic duo in this blended conversation than Ron Deal and Gary Chapman.”
Sandi Patty Peslis
Artist and mom to a beautiful blended family

“To the thousands of families I’ve worked with who didn’t feel so much blended as busted? This. This is the book we’ve all been waiting for. Gary Chapman and Ron Deal have cracked the code for those of us who are living with other people’s children and are longing to love them with honesty and compassion. Not only will the words within these pages strengthen your family, they will ground your marriage in new and deeper ways. This book is essential reading for any stepparent.”
Kathi Lipp 
Bestselling author of the Husband Project and coauthor of But I’m Not a Wicked Stepmom
 

“So often two families are put together without being prepared for the challenges ahead, Building Love Together in Blended Families is a great tool for preparing everyone involved. It allows you to reach for the others in the family that is to be. To love the way another most powerfully feels loved is the foundation of a blended family.”
Stephen Arterburn
Author and Founder of New Life LIVE!

“Creating a loving home is why couples form a blended family. But the process takes time and purpose. As a social researcher, I’ve seen that all parties—parents, stepparents, the children themselves—long for great relationships. I’ve also seen that understanding each other is the missing link. I can’t think of two experts better suited to help you do that than Ron Deal and Gary Chapman. This is a fantastic book, and is the essential guide all blended families need.” 
Shaunti Feldhahn
Social researcher and bestselling author of For Women Only, For Parents Only, and The Kindness Challenge

“Ron Deal and Gary Chapman are absolutely the perfect blend to enrich your blended family relationships. With over three decades of experience, Ron is THE leading authority globally on blended families. None better. And Gary, he is one of the top writers of our day. This is destined to be a bestseller and a classic for blended families everywhere.” 
Dennis Rainey
Cofounder, FamilyLife

“In our work with married couples, we’ve found that many of the most complicated issues facing modern marriages stem from blended family dynamics. In this powerful and practical new book, Gary Chapman and Ron Deal draw on their unparalleled expertise to masterfully unravel the complexities of blended family dynamics. Every chapter felt like a master class for spouses, parents and stepparents. This book will be a game-changer for every blended family!” 
Dave and Ashley Willis
Authors of The Naked Marriage and hosts of The Naked Marriage podcast

“When you love someone, you can’t help but show and tell about the people you love. But the realities of life and complexities of blended families can take their toll in living it out. This book, by two highly regarded relationship experts, will help you love your family more completely and with greater wisdom than ever before. You’ll love it and grow because of it, too!”
David Robbins
President and CEO of FamilyLife

 
“When I think of the most outstanding authority on marriage I know, I think of Gary Chapman and when I think of my go-to person on blended families, I think of Ron Deal. This book is a combination of the best of both of these two incredible writers and communicators. I loved every page in this most helpful book.”

Jim Burns
President, HomeWord; author, Doing Life with Your Adult Children

“Stepfamilies and first families are inherently different. The same rules just don’t apply. Adapting The 5 Love Languages to fit blended family life? Brilliant! This is the book every remarried couple needs to read—together!”
Brenda Ockun
Founder and publisher, StepMom Magazine

“Step families need a common language to build trust, connection, and new attachments. Building Love Together in Blended Families provides a path to “speak love” mutually so each family member can accept the love they need to grow closer. This is a wonderful hands-on resource.”
Gil and Brenda Stuart
Authors of Restored and Remarried

“This book offers valuable insight on how to apply the well-known principles of the five love languages in blended family relationships with those who may—or may not—seek to receive love or offer love in return. It’s practical, realistic, and inspiring. If you’re in a blended family, you need this book.” 
Gayla Grace
Author of Stepparenting with Grace: A Devotional for Blended Families

“The 5 Love Languages has had such a major impact on our marriage and The Smart Stepfamily gave us a roadmap to navigate blended family life. But Ron Deal and Gary Chapman’s collaboration in Building Love Together in Blended Families really gave us a blueprint for building long, lasting, loving relationships in our home.” 
Lamar and Ronnie Tyler
Speakers and cofounders of BlackandMarriedwithKids.com

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