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Bill The Vampire: A Comedy of Undead Proportions
THERE ARE REASONS WE FEAR THE NIGHT. HE'S NOT ONE OF THEM.
Loud-mouthed gamer Bill Ryder thought the dice had finally rolled in his favor when he met Sally. Sadly, his triumph quickly turned into a critical failure - leaving him at death's door with his throat torn out.
Now he's a vampire, trapped in a world of monsters that are stronger, deadlier, and a hell of a lot cooler. They're giving him just ninety days to prove he has what it takes to be an apex predator of the night, assuming he doesn't give them a reason to dust his ass sooner.
This game isn't over yet, though. Turns out a vamp like Bill hasn't been seen in centuries. He's got a few tricks up his sleeve, unexpected allies, and an attitude that's too obnoxious to quit. He'll need all that and more if he doesn't want to end up even deader than last time.
Join him in this hilarious tale of bloodthirsty beasts, gory mayhem, and an unlikely hero who's still at the bottom of the food chain.
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Bram Stoker meets The Big Bang Theory in Bill The Vampire - book one of The Tome of Bill, the vampire comedy series that'll leave you thirsting for more.
Perfect for fans of Shayne Silvers, Steve McHugh, Jim Butcher, and What We Do in the Shadows, this hilarious horror comedy will keep you entertained from start to finish.
Don't miss out on this bloody good time! Grab your copy of Bill The Vampire now and prepare to sink your teeth into a world of undead mayhem and gut-busting humor.
Content Warning: adult language, violence, gore, sexual situations, sophomoric humor
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Bill The Vampire: A Comedy of Undead Proportions
THERE ARE REASONS WE FEAR THE NIGHT. HE'S NOT ONE OF THEM.
Loud-mouthed gamer Bill Ryder thought the dice had finally rolled in his favor when he met Sally. Sadly, his triumph quickly turned into a critical failure - leaving him at death's door with his throat torn out.
Now he's a vampire, trapped in a world of monsters that are stronger, deadlier, and a hell of a lot cooler. They're giving him just ninety days to prove he has what it takes to be an apex predator of the night, assuming he doesn't give them a reason to dust his ass sooner.
This game isn't over yet, though. Turns out a vamp like Bill hasn't been seen in centuries. He's got a few tricks up his sleeve, unexpected allies, and an attitude that's too obnoxious to quit. He'll need all that and more if he doesn't want to end up even deader than last time.
Join him in this hilarious tale of bloodthirsty beasts, gory mayhem, and an unlikely hero who's still at the bottom of the food chain.
----------
Bram Stoker meets The Big Bang Theory in Bill The Vampire - book one of The Tome of Bill, the vampire comedy series that'll leave you thirsting for more.
Perfect for fans of Shayne Silvers, Steve McHugh, Jim Butcher, and What We Do in the Shadows, this hilarious horror comedy will keep you entertained from start to finish.
Don't miss out on this bloody good time! Grab your copy of Bill The Vampire now and prepare to sink your teeth into a world of undead mayhem and gut-busting humor.
THERE ARE REASONS WE FEAR THE NIGHT. HE'S NOT ONE OF THEM.
Loud-mouthed gamer Bill Ryder thought the dice had finally rolled in his favor when he met Sally. Sadly, his triumph quickly turned into a critical failure - leaving him at death's door with his throat torn out.
Now he's a vampire, trapped in a world of monsters that are stronger, deadlier, and a hell of a lot cooler. They're giving him just ninety days to prove he has what it takes to be an apex predator of the night, assuming he doesn't give them a reason to dust his ass sooner.
This game isn't over yet, though. Turns out a vamp like Bill hasn't been seen in centuries. He's got a few tricks up his sleeve, unexpected allies, and an attitude that's too obnoxious to quit. He'll need all that and more if he doesn't want to end up even deader than last time.
Join him in this hilarious tale of bloodthirsty beasts, gory mayhem, and an unlikely hero who's still at the bottom of the food chain.
----------
Bram Stoker meets The Big Bang Theory in Bill The Vampire - book one of The Tome of Bill, the vampire comedy series that'll leave you thirsting for more.
Perfect for fans of Shayne Silvers, Steve McHugh, Jim Butcher, and What We Do in the Shadows, this hilarious horror comedy will keep you entertained from start to finish.
Don't miss out on this bloody good time! Grab your copy of Bill The Vampire now and prepare to sink your teeth into a world of undead mayhem and gut-busting humor.
"Many times, I found myself smiling if not outright chuckling at the witty one-liners that his characters presented as well as the situations that they found themselves in as the story unfolded." - J.L. Whitehead from Examiner.com
"Rick Gualtieri brings something to the vampire genre that has not been seen before and I love it!"
"There are many parts throughout the series that had me cracking up"
"I would definitely suggest this to those who like raunchy, nerdy, vampire stories. As in, go read and/or listen to this! "
"This is freaking hilarious! "
"His quips and remarks remind me of Ash from Army of Darkness or Jack Burton from John Carpenters Big Trouble in Little China."
"The characters are amazing, the writing is solid, and the books have had me laughing out loud at times."
"This is one of the funniest thing I have ever read. I had tears running down my face. "
"I'm not sure if I'm exaggerating here, but it's been a while that I've been this excited after reading a first book in a new urban fantasy series."
"If this doesn't get turned into a movie I will give up on Hollywood forever."
