The New York Times Book Review - Curtis Sittenfeld
…spending time in the company of Yoli, a 40-something woman alternately busy with the work of caring for various family members and screwing up her own life, was the main reason I loved the book…All My Puny Sorrows is irresistible. The flashbacks to Yoli and Elf's childhood in a rural Mennonite community are vivid and energetic. In both the past and present, Toews…perfectly captures the casual manner in which close-knit sisters enjoy and irritate each other. The dialogue is realistic and funny, and somehow, almost magically, Toews gets away with having her characters discuss things like books and art and the meaning of life without seeming pretentious or precious; they're simply smart, decent and confused…All My Puny Sorrows is unsettling, because how can a novel about suicide not be? But its intelligence, its honesty and, above all, its compassion provide a kind of existential balm—a comfort not unlike the sort you might find by opening a bottle of wine and having a long conversation with…a true friend.
Publishers Weekly
★ 09/15/2014
Elfrieda’s a concert pianist. When we were kids she would occasionally let me be her page-tuner for the fast pieces that she hadn’t memorized.” This sentence, in the voice of the younger Yolandi, crystallizes the dynamic of the two sisters in Toews’s (Summer of My Amazing Luck) latest novel. While Elfrieda is the genius and the perfectionist, it is the practical, capable Yolandi on whom she depends. Over the course of this tender and bittersweet novel, Elf tours the world while Yoli stays put, has two kids with two different men but stays with neither of the fathers. It is Elf’s debilitating depression and suicidal tendencies that keep the two urgently close as Yoli, for decades, does everything she can to help Elf ward off her psychological problems. The prose throughout the book is lively and original and moves along at a steady clip. Though there are some underdeveloped aspects (their upbringing in a Mennonite household, Yoli’s experience of motherhood), the novel is a triumph in its depiction of the love the sisters share, as Yoli tries, just as when she was a page turner, to stay a few beats ahead. (Nov.)
From the Publisher
Irresistible… its intelligence, its honesty and, above all, its compassion provide a kind of existential balm-a comfort not unlike the sort you might find by opening a bottle of wine and having a long conversation with (yes, really) a true friend.” —Curtis Sittenfeld, The New York Times Book Review
“In the crucible of [Miriam Toews'] genius, tears and laughter are ground into some magical elixir that seems like the essence of life.” —Ron Charles, The Washington Post
“[A] wrenchingly honest, darkly funny novel. (Grade: A)” —Entertainment Weekly
“Bold, brash and big-hearted.... Toews writes from the point of view of Yoli, whose interior monologue reads like a cross between David Foster Wallace and Robin Williams if both were, in fact, a 40-something Mennonite woman with authority issues. She's a smart aleck with heart, a philosopher with a comic's timing.” —The Dallas Morning News
“Toews (Irma Voth) does a wonderful job with her characters, none of whom are perfect, which makes them all the more real. It requires a talented author to take a serious subject and write such an engaging, enjoyable work.” —Library Journal (starred)
“Touching and unexpectedly humorous.” —Marie Claire
“The novel, which is essentially about complex family relationships, is heartbreaking and ultimately forgiving, as Yolandi wonders what courage is needed to end a life versus the courage it takes to endure. You'll want to call your sister or your mom after finishing.” —Bustle
“[A] sad, wise, often funny and very good novel.” —Milwaukee Journal Sentinel
“'All My Puny Sorrows' is a bittersweet story about those who survive and those who can't fight the current.” —Minneapolis StarTribune
“[A] triumph in its depiction of the love the sisters share.” —Publishers Weekly (Starred Review)
“[A] masterful, original investigation into love, loss and survival.” —Kirkus (Starred Review)
“All My Puny Sorrows by Miriam Toews: The premise of Toews's sixth novel, released to critical acclaim in Canada earlier this year, is simple and devastating: there are two adult sisters, and one of them wants to die. She's a wildly successful and in-demand concert pianist, but she longs for self-annihilation. It's a premise that could easily be grindingly unbearable, but Toews is a writer of considerable subtlety and grace, with a gift for bringing flashes of lightness, even humor, to the darkest of tales.” —The Millions
“Funny and irresistibly warm” —Isaac Fitzgerald, BuzzFeed
“A harrowing and often very funny novel ... Every page yields a surprise, a laugh, or a line that will make your breath catch in your throat.” —Dan Kois, Slate
“As jagged and ripped open as a freshly torn heart.” —The Boston Globe
“Thanks to the prodigious talent of author Miriam Toews, "All My Puny Sorrows" is an off-kilter, frequently funny and begrudgingly life-affirming romp through, well, death…. a novel with such wincingly painful honesty and mordant humor.” —Los Angeles Times
Library Journal
★ 11/01/2014
Sisters should always want what is best for each other, but what if what one sister really wants is to end her life? This is the dilemma Yoli faces when her ethereal sister, Elf, attempts suicide. The beautiful Elf is a world-renowned pianist who's in a loving relationship and about to start an international tour, but having it all doesn't matter to her when she is drowning in despair. Yoli, as she rightfully points out, is the one struggling; she's twice divorced, with children by two different fathers, and after having achieved some success as a YA series author (though she has nothing like Elf's gifts), her career has stalled. But though she and Elf are close—the bond they forged while growing up in a conservative Mennonite town in Canada is central to the narrative—depression is hard to understand from the outside. VERDICT Despite the topic, this is not a dark novel. In fact, its gloom comes in the form of dark humor, and Toews (Irma Voth) does a wonderful job with her characters, none of whom are perfect, which makes them all the more real. It requires a talented author to take a serious subject and write such an engaging, enjoyable work.—Shaunna E. Hunter, Hampden-Sydney Coll. Lib., VA
Kirkus Reviews
★ 2014-07-24
A Canadian writer visits her older sister, a concert pianist who's just attempted suicide, in this masterful, original investigation into love, loss and survival. "She wanted to die and I wanted her to live and we were enemies who loved each other," Yolandi Von Riesen says of her sister, Elfrieda. Toews (Irma Voth, 2011, etc.) moves between Winnipeg, Toronto, and a small town founded by Mennonite immigrants who survived Bolshevik massacres, where the intellectual, free-spirited Von Riesen family doesn't share the elders' disapproval of "overt symbols of hope and individual signature pieces." Yoli looks back over time, realizing that the sisters' bond is strengthened by their painful memories. The girls' father baffles neighbors by supporting Elf's creative passions and campaigning to run a library. His suicide and absence from their adulthood make him even more important to his daughters as their paths diverge. Elf travels around Europe, emptying herself into Rachmaninoff performances; Yoli writes books about a rodeo heroine, feeling aimless and failed. Elf's husband appreciates her singular sensitivity as a performer, but this capacity for vulnerability dangerously underpins her many breakdowns and longstanding depression. Yoli's men are transient, leaving her with two children. Toews conveys family cycles of crisis and intermittent calm through recurring events and behaviors: Elf and her father both suffer from depression; Yoli and her mother face tragedy with wry humor and absurdist behavior; and two sisters experience parallel losses. Crisp chapter endings, like staccato musical notes, anchor the plot's pacing. Elf's determination to end her suffering by dying takes the form of a drumbeat of requests for Yoli to help her commit suicide. Readers yearn for more time with this complex, radiant woman who fiercely loves her family but cannot love herself. "Sadness is what holds our bones in place," Yoli thinks. Toews deepens our understanding of the pain found in Coleridge's poetry, which is the source of the book's title.
