A Life Everlasting: The Extraordinary Story of One Boy's Gift to Medical Science

by Sarah Gray

Overview

A donor mother’s powerful memoir of grief and rebirth that is also a fascinating medical science whodunit, taking us inside the world of organ, eye, tissue, and blood donation and cutting-edge scientific research.

When Sarah Gray received the devastating news that her unborn son Thomas was diagnosed with anencephaly, a terminal condition, she decided she wanted his death—and life—to have meaning. In the weeks before she gave birth to her twin sons in 2010, she arranged to donate Thomas’s organs. Due to his low birth weight, they would go to research rather than transplant. As transplant donors have the opportunity to meet recipients, Sarah wanted to know how Thomas's donation would be used.

That curiosity fueled a scientific odyssey that leads Sarah to some of the most prestigious scientific facilities in the country, including Harvard, Duke, and the University of Pennsylvania. Pulling back the curtain of protocol and confidentiality, she introduces the researchers who received Thomas’s donations, held his liver in their hands, studied his cells under the microscope.

Sarah’s journey to find solace and understanding takes her beyond her son’s donations—offering a breathtaking overview of the world of medical research and the valiant scientists on the horizon of discovery. She goes behind the scenes at organ procurement organizations, introducing skilled technicians for whom death means saving lives, empathetic counselors, and the brilliant minds who are finding surprising and inventive ways to treat and cure disease through these donations. She also shares the moving stories of other donor families.

A Life Everlasting is an unforgettable testament to hope, a tribute to life and discovery, and a portrait of unsung heroes pushing the boundaries of medical science for the benefit of all humanity.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9780062438249
Publisher:	HarperCollins
Publication date:	12/15/2023
Sold by:	Barnes & Noble
Format:	eBook
Pages:	293
File size:	808 KB

About the Author

Sarah Gray is a donor parent; an organ, eye, tissue, and blood donation advocate; and a public speaker. She is the director of communications for the American Association of Tissue Banks (AATB) in McLean, Virginia, and regularly speaks around the country. She lives in Washington, DC, with her husband, Ross; their son, Callum; and their daughter, Jocelyn. SarahGray.com

Table of Contents

Prologue 1

Chapter 1 It Wasn't Supposed to Happen Like This 3

Chapter 2 Sophie's Choice, Backward at 100 mph 17

Chapter 3 Better Than Nothing 37

Chapter 4 Hello, Good-Bye 51

Chapter 5 Thomas's Ride 73

Eli's Story 85

Chapter 6 Transplant Envy 93

Chapter 7 An Accidental Quest Begins-Schepens Eye Institute 113

Chapter 8 The Quest Continues-Duke 123

Chapter 9 The Quest Continues-Cytonet 131

Chapter 10 Out of My Comfort Zone 143

Antalya's Story: Mortui vivos docent 159

Chapter 11 The Dance 173

Sue's Story 181

Chapter 12 The Quest Isn't Over Yet-The University of Pennsylvania 193

Chapter 13 Who Was Afraid and Why 203

Chapter 14 From Donation to Discovery 211

Mara's Story: A Sword and a Shield 229

Epilogue: Dreamworld 235

Abbreviations and Acronyms 245

Resources 247

Acknowledgments 273

About the Author 277

Editorial Reviews

06/27/2016
Gray, director of communications for the American Association of Tissue Banks, personally recounts how her six-day-old son’s death helped save countless lives, detailing the dogged purpose and exuberant hope that fueled her daunting journey into the world of medical research. Gray and her husband, Ross, knew months before she gave birth to identical twin sons that one of them, Thomas, had a lethal neural tube defect, and they quickly recognized its “higher purpose”: that his death would allow organ and tissue donations. Knowing only that Thomas’s liver was recovered for a study on liver cell preparation, that his umbilical cord blood would be used for genetic studies, and that his eyes would go to “a very special education research project,” Gray methodically tracks down the places that received the donations and the researchers who studied them. “In his short but treasured life,” she proudly writes, Thomas accomplished nothing less than a contribution “to the advancement of modern medicine.” Gray writes movingly of the loss of her son, the research it aided, and the career to which it led her at the AATB as an advocate for organ and tissue donation. With this remarkable account, Thomas’s legacy will continue to inspire. (Sept.)

Publishers Weekly

Both poignant and uplifting, A Life Everlasting is not just the story of Thomas Gray; it is also the story of researchers and donation facilitators. Most of all, it is a story of how science can give meaning to both life and death.” — Science Magazine

“An informative account of the various aspects of organ donation and an inspiring affirmation of the potential value of every life, however brief. ” — Kirkus Reviews

“Sarah Gray’s A Life Everlasting proves that it’s not tragedy that defines us; rather, it’s the way we handle tragedy that leaves an indelible imprint on the future.” — Matthew Logelin, New York Times bestselling author of Two Kisses for Maddy

“Sarah Gray’s memoir chronicles her journey toward healing after her newborn son’s death, as well as her fascinating quest inside the world of organ, eye, and tissue donation. This lovely book is a reminder that even the shortest lives can make a big difference.” — Anna Whiston-Donaldson, New York Times bestselling author of Rare Bird

From the Publisher

Sarah Gray’s A Life Everlasting proves that it’s not tragedy that defines us; rather, it’s the way we handle tragedy that leaves an indelible imprint on the future.

Matthew Logelin

Both poignant and uplifting, A Life Everlasting is not just the story of Thomas Gray; it is also the story of researchers and donation facilitators. Most of all, it is a story of how science can give meaning to both life and death.

Science Magazine

Sarah Gray’s memoir chronicles her journey toward healing after her newborn son’s death, as well as her fascinating quest inside the world of organ, eye, and tissue donation. This lovely book is a reminder that even the shortest lives can make a big difference.

Anna Whiston-Donaldson

2016-06-21
How the author gave meaning to the short life of her son, who was diagnosed with anencephaly, a fatal neural defect.Gray and her husband were jubilant to learn that they were to be the parents of identical twins, only to have their hopes dashed when a subsequent screening revealed that one of them had anencephaly and would live a few days at most. She writes poignantly of the remaining months of her pregnancy and the need to prepare for one baby joining their home while bracing themselves "for the heartbreak of losing a child at the same time." Online, she learned about a research program being conducted at Duke University in which researchers were seeking a cause or cure for the defect by analyzing the blood of the parents and the cord blood of both twins. The Grays decided that they would give some meaning to their tragedy by participating in the program and donating the body of their infant after his death, and the author organized the logistics of preserving and transferring his remains. At the time of her pregnancy, Gray worked in marketing for the National Industries for the Severely Handicapped, managing a speaker's bureau that enlists people with disabilities to themselves become advocates. She is currently employed as director of communications for the American Association of Tissue Banks as an advocate for organ, eye, and tissue donations. Inspired by the hope of finding out how her son's brief life took on meaning, she traveled to the various institutions where his tissues have been studied by researchers. She writes movingly not only of her own experience finding out how her dead son "was contributing to the greater good," but also of the positive emotional impact of her visits on the researchers themselves. An informative account of the various aspects of organ donation and an inspiring affirmation of the potential value of every life, however brief.

Kirkus Reviews