A Dutiful Boy: A Memoir of Secrets, Lies and Family Love

by Mohsin Zaidi

Overview

WINNER OF THE 2021 LAMBDA LITERARY AWARD FOR GAY MEMOIR/BIOGRAPHY

A Guardian Best Book of the Year
A GQ Best Book of the Year
A New Statesman Best Book of the Year

A Dutiful Boy is Mohsin's personal journey from denial to acceptance: a revelatory memoir about the power of love, belonging, and living every part of your identity.

An inspiring and hopeful coming of age memoir about growing up queer in a strict Muslim household

Mohsin grew up in a poor pocket of east London, in a devout shia Muslim community. His family were close-knit and religiously conservative. From a young age, Mohsin felt different but in a home where being gay was inconceivable he also felt very alone. Outside of home Mohsin went to a failing inner city school where gang violence was a fact of life. As he grew up life didn't seem to offer teenage Mohsin any choices: he was disenfranchised from opportunity and isolated from his family as a closet gay Muslim. But Mohsin had incredible drive and became the first person from his school to go to Oxford University. At university came the newfound freedom to become the man his parents never wanted him to be. But when he was confronted by his father and a witch doctor invited to 'cure' him Mohsin had to make a difficult choice. Mohsin's story takes harrowing turns but it is full of life and humor, and, ultimately, it is an inspiring story about breaking through life's barriers.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781529112207
Publisher:	Penguin Random House UK
Publication date:	09/01/2021
Edition description:	Second edition
Pages:	288
Sales rank:	536,666
Product dimensions:	5.25(w) x 8.00(h) x 0.80(d)

About the Author

Mohsin Zaidi grew up in a devout Muslim community in East London. He was the first person from his school to go to Oxford University where he studied law. Mohsin has worked at a UN war crimes tribunal in The Hague and at the UK's Supreme Court. Today he is a criminal barrister at one of the top chambers in the country and works on a number of high profile cases. He is an advocate for LGBT rights, BAME representation and social mobility. He is on the board of Stonewall, the UK's biggest LGBT rights charity and is a governor of his former secondary school. Mohsin appears as a commentator on Sky News and has previously written for Newsweek.

Editorial Reviews

07/05/2021

Zaidi, a criminal attorney in Britain, debuts with a deeply affecting account of growing up gay in a devout Muslim household. For Zaidi, Shia Islam was an “all-encompassing world” that dictated, namely, that as a Muslim (and the eldest son of Pakistani immigrants), he would cultivate an abiding faith, support his parents, and find an acceptable wife. He details his life with his family in public housing in the ’90s in an East London neighborhood prone to gang violence. There, Zaidi, a soft-spoken, bookish kid tormented by bullies, threw himself into his studies and set himself apart from his peers. He also realized he was different in other ways: at age 13, after catching a glimpse of the TV show Queer As Folk, he knew he was gay. From that moment, Zaidi traces his struggle to reconcile his identity as he attended Oxford and, later, became a successful lawyer. After years of wishing he could trade his success for being “normal,” Zaidi eventually found self-acceptance and love, both in the form of romance and the support of his parents, who went from hiring a witch doctor at one point to “cure” him to fully embracing his sexuality. Zaidi’s story promises hard-earned catharsis, especially for readers struggling to claim their identity. (Sept.)

Publishers Weekly

"His engaging memoir of his long road to happiness and acceptance by his family is moving and inspiring." - Bookseller

"A deeply-moving account...a must-read." - Tatler 

"Zaidi's writing is underpinned by compassion and an understanding that acceptance can be a slow process, even for those who love you" - Guardian, *Books of the Year*

 "A remarkable memoir...an incredibly moving read. I had to put the book down several times to cry...it's a book that will save lives." - Sathnam Sanghera, author of The Boy With The Topknot

From the Publisher

2021-06-25
A prominent British barrister's account of growing up gay in an immigrant Pakistani family in which their Shia Muslim religion “was an all-encompassing world.”

Though he was “an English-born child,” Zaidi realized early on he “did not live in the England I saw on TV.” His corner of London was “overrun with fried chicken takeaways, halal butchers and Asian clothes shops.” His mother pushed him to excel academically and win scholarships to the private schools that would ensure success in the family’s adopted country. Zaidi threw himself into his studies, less to please his parents and more to avoid ruminating on his sexuality and the fact he was a living in a world rife with anti-Muslim sentiment. He applied to Oxford and, against his expectations, was admitted into a highly competitive jurisprudence program. Though he was overjoyed to be accepted to such a prestigious institution, Zaidi prayed to Allah to trade his place at Oxford for a “cure for my homosexuality,” which he believed would bring his parents shame. His student days at Oxford were as much a revelation intellectually as they were socially. While hoodies made his White friends look “sporty,” they made the brown-skinned author look “threatening.” At the same time, the freedom of college life helped Zaidi embrace his sexuality and loosen ties to his faith and its proscriptions. When the author tried to come out to his parents, his father attempted to “cure” him with visits from a healer who was “no real doctor but a man who peddled stories of black magic and jinn possession.” Zaidi went on to become a successful barrister and fall in love with a White Irishman who forced him to confront his own prejudices about loving across lines of color and culture. Both moving and thoughtful, this debut memoir engagingly explores the meaning of belonging and celebrates how love and acceptance can transcend race, class, and sexuality.

A fulfilling reading experience about relevant topics.

Kirkus Reviews