44 Chapters About 4 Men

44 Chapters About 4 Men

by BB Easton
44 Chapters About 4 Men

44 Chapters About 4 Men

by BB Easton

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Overview

One woman's secret journal completely changes her marriage in this hilarious and biting memoirthe inspiration for the Netflix Original Series SEX/LIFE.   School psychologists aren't supposed to write books about sex. Doing so would be considered "unethical" and "a fireable offense." Lucky for you, ethics was never my strong suit.   Sex/Life: 44 Chapters About 4 Men is a laugh-out-loud funny and brutally honest look at female sexuality, as told through the razor-sharp lens of domesticated bad girl BB Easton. No one and nothing is off limits as BB revisits the ex-boyfriends—a sadistic tattoo artist, a punk rock parolee, and a heavy metal bass player—that led her to finally find true love with a straight-laced, drop-dead-gorgeous . . . accountant.   After settling down and starting a family with her perfectly vanilla "husbot," Ken, BB finds herself longing for the reckless passion she had in her youth. She begins to write about these escapades in a secret journal, just for fun, but when Ken starts to act out the words on the pages, BB realizes that she might have stumbled upon the holy grail of behavior modification techniques.   The psychological dance that ensues is nothing short of hilarious as BB wields her journal like a blowtorch, trying to light a fire under her cold, distant partner. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't, but in the end, BB learns that the man she was trying so hard to change was perfect for her all along.

To view a comprehensive content warning, please visit the author's website.

Product Details

ISBN-13: 9781538718322
Publisher: Grand Central Publishing
Publication date: 11/19/2019
Sold by: Hachette Digital, Inc.
Format: eBook
Sales rank: 106,813
File size: 2 MB

About the Author

BB Easton lives in the suburbs of Atlanta, Georgia, with her long-suffering husband, Ken, and two adorable children. She recently quit her job as a school psychologist to write books about her punk rock past and deviant sexual history full-time. Ken is suuuper excited about that.
BB's memoir, 44 Chapters About 4 Men, and the spin-off 44 Chapters novels are the inspiration for Sex/Life, a steamy, female-centered dramedy series coming soon to Netflix.
The Rain Trilogy, an epic apocalyptic love story, is her first work of fiction. Or at least, that's what she thought when she wrote it in 2019. Then 2020 hit and all of her dystopian plot points started coming true. If you need her, she'll be busy writing a feel-good utopian rom-com to see if that fixes everything.
You can find her procrastinating in all the following places:
Email: authorbbeaston@gmail.comWebsite: www.authorbbeaston.comFacebook: www.facebook.com/bbeastonInstagram: www.instagram.com/author.bb.eastonTwitter: www.twitter.com/bb_eastonPinterest: www.pinterest.com/artbyeastonGoodreads: https://goo.gl/4hiwiRBookBub: https://www.bookbub.com/authors/bb-eastonSpotify: https://open.spotify.com/user/bbeastonEtsy: www.etsy.com/shop/artbyeaston#TeamBB Facebook group: www.facebook.com/groups/BBEastonAnd giving away a free e-book from one of her author friends each month in her newsletter: www.authorbbeaston.com/subscribe

Table of Contents

Author's Note xi

Introduction xiii

Glossary xvii

1 The Husbot 1

2 Skeletor 6

3 Frenemies 12

4 Props 18

5 Condiments Are for Hot Dogs, Not Wieners 23

6 Enter the Evil Professor 35

7 The Notorious K.E.N. 42

8 Call Me Crazy 44

9 Lady and the Tramp 50

10 Ken, Meet Fantasy Harley 59

11 Inception-Style, Muthafucka! 76

12 More Like, Billy I-Don't 79

13 Knock, Knock. Who's There? Ding-Dong 87

14 My Tail Fell Off Again 95

15 Hocus Poke-us 100

16 Oh No, I Incest 103

17 Hoodie and the Blowjob 105

18 Hard Work (Pun Intended) 114

19 BB Suffers 118

20 The Worst 121

21 Somebody Call Oprah 125

22 Hansel and Metal 128

23 I Was in a Basement, Surrounded by Phantom Limbs 161

24 Bass Players Do It With Rhythm 166

25 Bonerversary 171

26 Guard Your Thighs 175

27 Skynet Has Become Self-Aware! Skynet Has Become Self-Aware! 180

28 When the SUV's A-Rockin' 183

29 Mark McKen 194

30 Mission(ary) Accomplished! 210

31 Stupid Safe Word 219

32 Leprechauns Love Anal 223

33 We Both Have Gmail Accounts. It's Like We Want to Get Fired 228

34 867-5309 233

35 Hasta La Vista, Knight 236

36 Roses Are Red, Violets Are Assholes 242

37 What a Difference a Year Makes 243

38 Sex on the Beach 245

39 Adieu 254

40 Haiku of Shame 257

41 What's Your Beef with Breakfast, Ken? 259

42 Take a Picture. It'll Last Longer 272

43 You Can't Always Get What You Want 277

44 Blue Balls 282

Epilogue: Actual Text Conversation with Dr. Sara Snow 285

Acknowledgments 289

Excerpt from Skin 295

About the Author 327

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