Table of Contents
PART 1: Our lifelong search for truth. 1 Caught unaware, 2 Preparing to grow. PART 2: Twenty truths and twenty choices that can transform. 3 Thoughts about our birth parents are innate, 4 Painful feelings about our adoption are normal, 5 Learning about adoption dynamics will help us relax, 6 It may often seem like no one 'gets it', 7 Share deep feelings only with "safe" people, 8 We can control our anger -- really!, 9 We can get unstuck from our painful past, 10 Many of us experience echoes of loss, 11 An Hour with a Fellow Adoptee Is Better Than Therapy, 12 False guilt shouldn't stop us from considering a reunion 13: Search and reunion may become a top priority, 14 We don't need to fear seeming ungrateful or disloyal, 15 We must give up being pleasers, 16 Taking concrete steps toward obtaining our pre-adoption history requires courage... we can do it!, 17 When we feel overwhelmed we must be gentle with ourselves, 18 Birth relatives may reject us, but there's someone who never will, 19 The word "rejection" may not be in the vocabularies of other birth relatives!, 20 Letting go of our birth mother's original decision will set us free, 21 Our footsteps are unique across the sands, 22 We can help others by being transparent, Appendix, Notes
